Hollywood Here We Are
by sarahandkate
Summary: Sequel to BC:HELLO&GOODBYE. Bella, Rose, Alice & Serena are now the popular group, "Toxique". Four years later, she and Edward are reunited. Will they pick up from where they left off? Or will more drama ruin their relationship? AH/OOC. Suck@Summaries.
1. Sober

**The sequel you've all been waiting for is here! :)  
(Sorry for the long wait, we had some trouble with the computer but were able to send it to another.)  
Um, we haven't exactly come up with the summary but to all of you who read Beverly Hills Academy,  
We're pretty sure you have an idea of where they left off and such. Also, the name of the story will just be temporary until we think of a better one.  
One more thing: Congrats to our winner Jenny, from our contest in the other story (:**

**DISCLAIMER: We do not own the Twilight characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyer. Anything you may come across this story that is in real life; we do not own either. We just own the computer, the plot and the character Serena Welsford. Kthnks :)  
**(There's also a disclaimer on our profile; we forget to add them sometimes)

**

* * *

**"Wakey wakey girls!" Our manager, Carly came bursting into our room.

I groaned and threw a pillow over my head. "10 minutes!"

"Girls, it's already 4:00 in the afternoon! You have to be ready by 6:30 and walk the red carpet at 7. Then your premier starts at 8 sharp!"

We were so busy, I forgot the premier of our new movie, Beverly Hills, was tonight. Our dad, Charlie, who's a famous director was so happy the girls and I were now part of the industry, he wanted to create a movie about how we became the popular pop group, "Toxique" And guess where it all started? The second we arrived at Beverly Hills Academy and we each played our own parts. It was so tough re-acting everything. And the hardest part was working with Robert Pattinson, who played Edward. He was only 2 years older than me. He looked exactly like Edward Cullen. I couldn't stop looking at him. It made me so frusterated.

Edward wouldn't pick up his phone whenever I called. Or respond to any of my emails. I stopped calling and emailing after a few weeks. So I haven't spoke to him for the past four years. Yep, we were now 20 and living in LA in a big white mansion. But I still thought about him every second of the day. I wore the bracelet he gave me back when I left the academy, everyday. I only took it off when I showered or went to bed. It was my good luck charm.

"Come on girls! Up, up, up!" Carly clapped her hands. You know, I loved Carly as our manager but as a friend, she was so annoying waking us up like this. She was 24 years old. That's what made her so fun. She was young and understood everything.

"Alright! I'm up!" Rose groaned and sat up on her bed.

I burried my face into my pillow. "Carly did you say it was 4? And we had to be ready by 6:30?" Alice asked.

"Yes, I did."

Alice jumped. "Ah! We only have two and a half hours to get ready!"

You see, for Alice, you'd have to wake her up 5 hours earlier. She says you don't rush art. Typical Alice, right? And why does she need five hours just to put on an outfit, do her hair and make up?

"Well girls, I'll be downstairs with the rest of the crew." Carly said and walked out.

Alice hopped out of bed and ran to her closet. "Guys what are you wearing?"

"Sweats." I grinned. I knew how much she hated when I wore sweats. She'd give me a lecture about how I'd get made fun of just by wearing sweats to a party. Psht, we all have our different tastes. But no, Alice will be Alice and force you into a dress.

"Bella!" she hissed.

"Joking!"

"I'm wearing that red strapless dress," Rose yawned. "and gold pumps. I'm not going overboard like pixie over there."

"Hey!" Alice shouted from behind her closet door.

"What about you Bella?" Serena asked. She was still lying on her bed.

"I don't know," I shrugged. "What do you wear to a premier anyway?"

"Um, like the hottest dress in the world!" Alice came out with a hot pink bubble dress.

I sighed. I might as well wear a dress. Knowing Alice, she'd rip off whatever I was wearing and replace it with something more 'exquisite'. "I'll wear that silver one I bought a week ago."

"Ooh, yeah you should. It's gorgeous!" Serena clapped her hands.

I rolled my eyes. Yep, she was definitely another Alice. "Alright well I'm going to take a shower."

I got up and walked to my closet. I pulled out the silver dress. It was two shades, a light shade of silver and a darker shade of silver. The straps were dark and made a sweetheart neck and the thick stripe connected in the middle, then parted underneath where my chest was suppose to be and ended at my sides. The rest of the dress was light shaded and the dress ended mid-thigh. I was going to wear my silver pumps with the dress and curl my hair. I took two towels out of the cabinet and went into our bathroom. And let me tell you, our bathroom was the size of my room back in the academy. It was huge! I was definitely living a dream.

* * *

We arrived at the red carpet exactly at 7. We had an hour to kill until the movie premiered. We got out of the limo and immediately, our fans started screaming our names. I laughed and waved to everybody.

The four of us linked arms and started walking down the carpet. We posed for the photographers and paparazzi. We all dispursed among the crowd.

"Bella over here!" A few boys shouted. I laughed and went up to them. We were seperated by a rope divider. The boys held out posters and pictures of me. I signed a few of them and saw my co-star, Robert Pattinson. He waved to me and I quickly blushed. My audience seemed to notice because the next thing I heard was, "Ooh, Bella and Rob!"

"We love you Bella!" They all shouted as I walked towards Robert.

Rob was signing a few autographs but he turned around the second I said hi. He came to my side and put his arm around my shoulder. He leaned in and kissed my cheek- why did everyone suddenly like to do that? "How are you?" he asked in his sexy British accent. Oh, how I adored the accent. I liked his American accent even better though. Which he spoke in during the movie.

"I'm great! I can't wait to see our big movie!" I grinned like an idiot.

He chuckled. I swear my heart died a little. His chuckle was the sweetest sound. "Same with me."

We posed for the paparazzi for the millionth time. We had people coming to the set and asking us if they could have a picture with us. I didn't mind but come on, I bet there's over a thousand pictures of us on the internet.

An interviewer came up to me and asked if I had some time. "Sure," I said then turned to Rob. "Save me a seat?"

"Of course." He nodded and took his hand off my shoulder. I walked with the lady.

She spoke into the mic. "We're here live in Hollywood, I'm here with Bella Swan who stars in the movie everybody's been buzzing about, Beverly Hills," she turned to me. "So, Bella, how did you feel when you're father asked to direct a movie about your life in Beverly Hills?"

I ran a hand through my hair, something I did a lot during interviews. "Um, I was quite excited actually. Like, a movie based on how I came to Hollywood? It was fun to visit _some _of moments and act them out again."

"So every scene in the film is actually real? They made no changes whatsoever?"

I shook my head. "Um, they kept everything realistic. To the first time I met Edward and to the arguements I had with Tanya. Everything is in the movie."

"So, what's the deal with you and Edward? Since everything is based on real life, you and Edward were a thing?"

That was too personal but everyone knew already. "Yeah, actually. He's Alice's brother in real life. Um, we met at the academy and we had our ups and downs but in the end we realized we loved each other. It's all in the movie."

"Do you still speak with him?"

I frowned but I didn't make it obvious. "Um, no. Not really."

I could tell she knew I didn't want to talk about it anymore. "Well, that's all the questions I have for today. I'm very anxious to see the movie, which will start in about 40 minutes. I'm Trisha Chong and this is Bella Swan live from Hollywood."

She thanked me and I walked back onto the carpet, signing more autographs and posing for more photographers.

It became closer to 8 so I decided to take my seat in the theatre. I looked for Rob who was already seated. I sat down beside him. "Hey."

"Oh hey, I was just looking for you." he said.

"Yeah, sorry I had to sign some more autographs. You know how it is."

"Yeah, crazy isn't it?" he chuckled and ran a hand through his crazy, messy bronze hair. It hadn't faded since we started filming.

We talked for a few more minutes until the movie finally started. I was crying throughout the whole movie. Robert noticed. He kindly lent his shoulder for me to cry on. Ugh, this was embaressing! I just couldn't watch it. Filming it was already enough.

The movie was almost over. We were at the part where I was leaving the academy and Edward called my name and gave me the bracelet. We used the real one for the movie. Then it showed us arriving at Hollywood and then, the end!

Everybody around us clapped and commented about the movie. "Are you okay?" Rob whispered in my ear.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I gave him a reasuuring smile.

We got up from our seats and he put his arm around my shoulder again. He reminded me like Edward so much. We walked out of the threatre and back onto the carpet. I looked up at the sky and saw one bright shining star. I closed my eyes and made a wish. A wish that I've said over and over again every 11:11.

Rob and I posed for a few more minutes and signed some more autographs. Everyone squealed his name. One girl shouted, "I love you!" and he shouted, "really?" This one girl asked him to marry her and he said, "sorry, I've already asked Bella that." I blushed to the extremes!

"So Bella, how'd you feel when Rob asked you to marry him?" a report asked.

I looked up at Rob. "You can't joke around like that!" I hissed but only to a tone he could hear.

"Who says I was joking?" He whispered.

"Rob!"

"I was joking." He laughed.

"Well Bella?" the report was waiting impatiently. They get annoying everytime.

I decided to play along with it. "I was so flattered, I mean, Robert Pattinson? Woo!"

I quickly pulled Rob by the wrist so we could get away from the reporter. We saw Kellan Lutz, the guy who played Emmett so we walked over to him.

"Bella! Rob! My favourite couple on earth!" he was in between us and pulled us closer to him.

"Couple?" I raised my brow at him.

"Uh, well, you know what I mean... couple as in friends as in, oh got to go!" he let go of the two of us.

"What's his deal?" I asked.

"He's Kellan." he shrugged.

Talk about akward moment...

* * *

We came back home earlier than usual. It was 2:30 in the morning. I was so tired but I was use to coming home later.

I changed into my comfortable PJs and jumped onto my bed. "So Bella, you and Rob eh?" Rose winked at me.

I gasped. "Why is everyone saying that?!"

"You didn't tell me he asked you to marry him!" Alice frowned.

"What?! OH MY GOSH YOU'RE ENGAGED TO ROBERT PATTINSON?!" Serena dropped her toothbrush.

I rolled my eyes. "No it's just a joke."

The three of them rolled their eyes. "Mmmhmm."

Just in time, Carly came in before they could say anything. "Bella, you have an interview tomorrow with Rob down at MTV at 11."

"In the morning?!"

"Yes. You'll have too get up early."

I groaned. "Joy."

"After that, the cast will be going to the Ellen DeGeneres studio and will be guest staring at her show." she read from her clipboard.

"You girls have a big day tomorrow! Lots of interviews this week and it all starts tomorrow!"

We all groaned. "Joy!"

"Now get a good night's sleep. You'll need it."

We all complained for another minute before tucking in ourselves.

"Night!" I yelled out.

"Night!" they shouted back.

* * *

I was just on time for the interview with Rob at the MTV studio. We said hi to each other and sat down in front of the camera. Our interviewer, Larry, introduced himself and started throwing questions at us.

"Bella why did you think Charlie wanted to direct a film on your point of view?"

"Well my dad thought I went through an interesting time. Um, I guess he just wanted to show that we were also your average teenagers. You know, going to school everyday, hanging out with our friends, and just having normal high school lives. Like encountering drama. We all go through it at times. I don't know I guess it's just some people out here believe that everyone gets it so easy. Like they make our lives seem perfect when really they're not."

"So Rob, tell us about your character."

Rob ran a hand through his hair for like the billionth time today. "Uh...uh...well I play a guy named Edward Cullen...he's uh...I don't know he's just your average american teenager who likes to use girls for entertainment...uh..." it was so cute when he struggled with what he was going to say. "but when Bella comes in the picture he uh, sees how different she is from the girls he's been with. So he tries to win her heart but she notices how much of a jerk he is," He chuckled, "but later on he explains that he's really not a jerk so they become friends and have their ups and downs and he's left alone in the end." he shrugged.

_Wow, Rob,_ I thought. _Way to explain the love of my life's situation, 'and he's left alone in the end.' _

"So Bella, we know that you play your own part, what was it like to go through those moments again?"

"Um, it wasn't easy explaining the story to our script writer and co-writing it. Not to mention actually acting it out again. It was really difficult for me but you know I didn't want to let everyone down. Everybody goes through difficult times. We all have our stories, so why not share mine?"

"Yeah she would cry during scenes so Charlie would have to stop filming and we'd have to wait until she was good to go again." Rob added.

Larry nodded. "I can't imagine what you went through. You were very brave to be doing that again."

"Yeah." I just nodded.

"Many of your fans are asking, what's your chemisty like on screen and off?"

I hated when this question popped up. "Um," I looked at Rob who was running his hand through his hair. "I guess you could say we're pretty close off screen. We hang out and all."

"And on screen is basically the chemisty Bella and Edward had."

"And we heard that Rob here proposed to you? Is that true?"

Rob burst out in laughter. "Yeah, I asked her on set this one time."

I laughed at the memory. "Yeah, we were just in one big group roll playing the scene where I was about to leave and Rob gets down on one knee and goes, 'Bella marry me!' and I go, 'Yes of course!' But like it wasn't even part of the script. We were just fooling around."

Larry laughed. "Seems like you two are more than close to each other."

I immediately blushed. "She's blushing!" Rob pointed at me and laughed.

"Shut up!"

"Anyway, so, in the movie there is one big competition scene, did you do that at the academy or was it just an added part?"

"Yeah, it was real. It was just sort of a Bella vs. Tanya thing just to like humiliate her so she could finally get some sense and leave me alone. It was really pointless."

"Did your plan work in the end?"

My mind shot back to the moment I saw Edward and Tanya. "Um, not really. She got back at me when I least expected it. It's all in the movie."

"Ah yes, the ending. Rob why do you think fans love Edward Cullen so much?"

Poor Rob. His questions were always referring back to Edward. "Uh I don't know. I guess it's his looks," he laughed. "I really don't know," he cocked his head to the side, thinking. "I guess it's just the way he cares for Bella. He would take a bullet for her. I guess it's just girls don't see that in guys these days. Then Edward was introduced to them and," he shrugged. "Yeah."

"And to Rob, your fan girls are asking, will you marry them?"

Rob laughed but before he could answer, I responded. "Sorry girls, I beat you to the cake." I laughed.

We all laughed. "Well thank you for coming out here today. I look forward to more interviews later on."

"Yeah, no problem."

We said good bye to him and went into a limo which was going to take us to the airport and take a plane to the Ellen DeGeneres studio. I breathed in deeply, one long ride with Robert Pattinson to the airport and on a plane to the studio. Wow.

* * *

We arrived at the studio just in time. We signed a lot of autographs and posed for pictures again. I was use to that, it was a daily thing for us. Everyone was here, the family was back again. Rose, Alice, Serena, Kellan, Jackson, Robert.

We joined Ellen on the sofas. She was such a fun, outgoing person. We talked for a little bit more until the camera started rolling. She asked us the same questions we got before but some of them were new.

"What was the craziest fan reaction you've encountered?" Ellen asked.

Serena laughed. "Oh my gosh, there's like so many! But I remember this one time I was just walking back to my car and I found so many post-its sticking on my window with all these guys numbers!"

We all laughed. "Did you call any of them?"

"Sadly, no," she shook her head. "Only because I didn't know any of them so you know, just to be on the safe side."

"What about you Jackson?"

He blew a big puff of air. "Um, actually, at the premier, this one girl asked me to sign her chest," we all gasped. "No, no, it wasn't like that. She was wearing this V-neck shirt so she asked me to sign where the opening was, I was sort of um, surprised but you know, at least she didn't pull her shirt up." he laughed.

"Oh wow. That must of been one hell of an experience! I mean, I didn't think girls actually had the guts to go up to you guys like that. And when they actually go and ask Rob to marry him? Rob how are you feeling about that?!"

Gah! The marriage question just keeps popping up! He ran a hand through his hair. "I think it's crazy! I don't even know any of them! Tell me how that works!"

Then Ellen asked what the deal was between me and him. I quickly looked down trying to hide my face. Who knows how many shades I was blushing this time. Rob kept looking at me the whole time. Which made things feel even more akward.

Ellen asked us some more questions then asked me and Rose to have a dance competition. Since we took classes when we were younger. A DJ came out and played some mixed songs. I hated freestyling but I guess I was sort of good so I didn't mess up too badly. Rose and I tied since they couldn't decide which twin was the best dancer.

Then came the belching contest. The crew set up a table in front of us and gave us each a cup filled with coke. We were allowed only one sip. I took the biggest sip possible and set my cup down. I opened my mouth and a loud burp flew out. "Holy crow!" Ellen laughed. I was beaten by Kellan in the end.

I have to say, out of all the interviews I've done, this has got to be the funnest. "Well thank you for coming down at the studio today. Your fans submitted so many entries begging to have you guys down here so we're glad to have you here."

The audience started screaming and lifted up their posters. We waved goodbye and exited through the doors. I said my goodbyes to everyone. We met our managers by each of our limos.

"So you and Rob huh?" Serena poked me.

"We're just friends S."

"Right," she rolled her eyes. "That's what you said about Edward."

I immediately looked down to my bracelet. My heart still skipped a beat whenever someone would say his name or mention him. "Just shut up." I layed back onto my seat and stared at the window wondering what he was doing right now. I missed him so much.

* * *

**Let us know what you think :)  
We were kind of unsatisfied with the chap but decided to give it a chance anyway.  
Thanks (:**


	2. Just Dance

**Thank you for all the reviews.  
****NOTE:**** We're not using Robert Pattinson's name. Instead his character which is the actor who plays Edward,  
will be named Shane Cruz (It was rushed) so, again, instead of Robert his name is Shane. Thanks :)  
Enjoy!**

Disclaimer: We do not own the characters from Twilight. However we do own the characters Serena Welsord and Alexis Dwyer.

* * *

"Ok girls, you have a photoshoot with Exquisite magazine first thing tomorrow followed by an interview it's just you girls since Ashley," Ashley was the actress who played Tanya, "couldn't make it and then, I cleared out your schedule for your Christmas break but, of course interviews will start again after. Also, you'll be starting your tour for you new CD release in mid January." Carly read off her clipboard again as the four of us layed dead on the sofas. "I'll be back first thing tomorrow. Have a good sleep ladies." She said goodbye and helped herself out the door.

Ah, Christmas. My favourite time of the year. Though Rose and I couldn't spend it with Charlie. He was off somewhere in New York. But Rose had her own plans. She was going to spend it with our mother, Renee and Phil, our step dad. I didn't like him very much. I was happy for the two of them, really but, I don't know. There was something about him I didn't like. Rose convinced me to come with her and I told her I didn't want to. She knew not force me into anything so it was just her, Renee, Phil and Alexis. Alexis was our baby sister. I was shocked when I found out too. She was turning two on January 4th. She had Phil's hazel eyes and Renee's straight light brown hair. She was so adorable. I was glad to have a little sister like her. Though I didn't see her often. I sort of had an arguement with Renee a while back. It wasn't one of my favourite stories to tell.

"Bella why don't you come spend Christmas with me? Carlisle and Esme would love to see you!" Alice's eyes lit up. It happened often when she wanted something. "Plus Emmett will be there."

It would be nice to see Carlisle and Esme again. I haven't see them since their New Year's party last year. I spoke to Emmett probably once a week. I missed him a lot. We'd have to make up another day the next time I see him. Thing Trios was getting old. "Gee I don't know Alice." I wanted to go but then what if Edward decided to show up this time? Alice told me Edward hadn't showed up for Christmas since he graduated and went off to collage. She hasn't seen him for two years now. I was glad to know he was doing fine though.

She shot me a pleading look. "Oh come on Bella. You know you want to. What else are you going to do?"

"Bella I would go if I were you. You never know who you could bump into." Serena winked.

"Do you really think he would show up?" I wondered.

Rose nodded. "Yes because fate will fight to keep you two together."

Then why has fate turned against me all these years? "I guess I could go." I really wanted to see him.

"Yay! I can't wait to tell them!" Alice started dialing numbers on her phone. Even if she was 20, she still acted like a 9 year old. She skipped off into another room.

I got up and went into the kitchen. I wondered what Dave and Carl, our personal chefs, were making for dinner today. They always made the best meals. I could almost taste the sweet delicious smell as I sat down on one of the stools. "Hey Dave, Carl."

"Ah, Miss Swan. Your food is ready soon." Carl had a polish accent. It was pretty cool.

I leaned over the counter. "Nah, ah, ah," Dave shook his finger at me. "No peeking!" He grinned.

"But!" I frowned.

He cut me off. "We will have Belinda to bring it to you when it's finished. Go on about your buisness Miss Swan." Dave grinned.

"Fine." After all, chef's need their time and space to create a perfect meal right? I got up from the stool and went back into the living room joining the girls.

"Hey I called Esme. We're going there tomorrow after the photoshoot and we'll be there until January 3rd." Alice said.

Wow we had a longer break than usual. "Okay. Rose when are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow. My flight's an hour and a half after the photoshoot."

"What about you S?"

"Ugh!" She threw her hands up in the air. "I forgot! I can't make it to the shoot. My flight is at 3:30 in the morning! That was the only time I could get."

"Did you tell Carly?" 3:30? That was so early!

"No I better call her now. I completely forgot." She got up and went upstairs.

"So I guess it's just us three then." I shrugged.

"Yeah but family comes first. So what movie are we watching?" Rose picked up a few DVDs from the pile in front of her.

"Oh! A Walk to Remember! I love that movie!" We all shouted then laughed.

Rose put the DVD in. "Belinda! Can you get us some popcorn please?!" Alice shouted in her angelic tone.

"Of course Alice." Belinda shouted back. Belinda was our housekeeper. She was more like a friend to us. Everyone in this house was our best friends. They just cleaned up...and cooked...for us.

We all hoped onto our theatre seat sofas. They were really good for action movies. The chair would vibrate or move around so it actually feels like you're in that movie. We've got some pretty sick furniture.

Serena joined us in a matter of minutes. She told us Carly got mad at first but then let her off the hook since it was Christmas and family always came first.

I cried during the end. I loved the chemisty between them. A Walk to Remember was one of my favourite movies. I've watched it more than a million times and I still cried each time. I could never get tired of this movie.

We helped Serena pack afterwards. She was going to be there until January 4th. To us it seemed like forever.

We went with her to the airport. Her flight was about to leave in half an hour. We already said our goodbyes.

"S, we'll be back here to pick you up." Rose gave her a hug.

"Okay, I'll see you guys in two weeks!" She picked up her carry on bag.

"We'll miss you!" We yelled after her.

She turned around and waved back at us.

"And then there was three." I sighed.

Alice and Rose put their arms around my shoulder. "It's just two weeks Bells. Come on, I've got an idea." Alice grinned. Oh boy. Her and her ideas!

* * *

Alice ended up taking us to a night club. She knew that I would be perfectly healthy when I entered but drunk when I left. Ever since I turned 18 and finally got my driver's liscense I was going to clubs nonstop. It was a bad habit of mine. Drinking seemed to calm my mood and just make all my problems go away. I ended up on almost every cover of every magazine or newspaper. Carly was getting upset with me. So she sent me to rehab for 6 months. I got out last Febuary. I haven't had one drink since then. But, I was introduced to a new friend of mine, the white and brown sticks we like to call, ciagarettes. I only smoked once in a while when I was stressed out or bothered by something. Rose, Alice, Serena and Carly tried slapping some sense into me and forcing me to quit. I told them nothing or no one can stop me. So for the past 10 months, I've been ignoring my past. I put everything behind and tried to become a better person. It seemed to work. No one was talking about the issues anymore and I was back to my old self. You know, I never really understood why I was so stressed out that alchol was my best friend. They convinced me it was because I was worrying about Edward too much. I finally realized they were right all along after thinking about it in rehab. I never want to go back to that place again.

"Alice!" Rose hissed. "You know Carly will get upset if she finds out we're here!"

We were just getting out of the car. "Oh come on. Bella's been sober for the past what? 10 months? She'll be fine!"

"Alice take us back or I'll be towing your porsche down the river." Rose threatened. She was the most sensitive one about my 'issues'.

Alice gasped. "You wouldn't."

"Watch me." Rose challenged.

"Guys! Can we stop arguing? People are starting to look at us! And who knows where the paparazzi are hiding. So let's just go in and forget that I had problems in the past. I'll be fine." I hated when they played the 'Protecting Bella' game. I was old enough to take care of myself.

"Ok but Bella if you have more than two drinks, that's it. We're out of here." Rose looked at me reassuring her seriousness.

I nodded. "Yes ma'am."

She took my hand and dragged me inside. I sighed at the sight. Oh how I missed going clubbing every night. We made our way to the dance floor. Everybody screamed the second they saw us but left us alone after taking pictures with us.

For some odd reason I was desparetly wanting Edward with me right now. Eveytime I closed my eyes, I could see his green eyes staring back at me, worried. My mind suddenly flew back to the day I saw him cry for the first time ever and to the last time before I left. I looked down at my bracelet. I needed him so much right now.

I danced with a few people before sneaking off to the bar. I went through three bottles of beer, two marguaritas and two glasses of wine before the bartender finally cut me off. I demanded for another glass but gave up after minutes of convincing him. I layed my hands on the bar and rested my chin onto them. I crossed the line. I did it again. I would have to face Carly again as soon as she found out. I tried to calm myself but my headache was increasing. I could feel the room around me spinning endlessly. My eyes were droopy. I had to get out of here before I ended up doing something I would regret after. But how could I move?

I compsed my face into an expression no one can can easily read. But I failed. As soon as I stood up and straightened my dress I fell into another set of arms. "Are you okay?" a familiar voice asked.

I looked up at him. Though it was difficult because I was seeing doubles. But I knew it was him. "Jake?"

"Bells? Are you okay?" he was concerned. Why did everybody like to play a game I did not want to be the target of?

"Please get me out of here." I whispered.

I couldn't stand up straight no matter how much I was leaning onto him. I took off my heels and carried them with me as Jake helped me out the door. I wonder where Alice and Rose were. As soon as we stepped outside the annoying flash went off from several cameras. Paparazzi were throwing questions at me. Jake put his jacket around me to cover me from the paparazzi. I couldn't breathe steadily. Everytime I did I, I had the burning desire to throw up. I hated that feeling. I couldn't take it anymore. The feeling in my throat was just dying to come out. I bent on my knees and vomitted all over the ground. The voices around me soon became a blur. The faces were nowhere to be seen. I fell to the ground and all then _he_ appeared. I saw him. He was running towards me, calling out my name. He was worried. I wanted to tell him everything was going to be fine. But he disappeared. _"Edward."_ I whispered before falling back into the darkness.

* * *

I woke up to the sound of the birds. Singing outside the window. The sunlight burned onto my face. I opened my eyes to see I was back in my room. I slowly started to get up but was pushed back down. My head still ached.

"Not so fast." Jake said.

"Wha-What are you doing here?" My voice was raspy.

He threw a hand to his chest and rubbed it slowly. "Ouch Bells. I didn't know you felt that way about me."

I glared at him as he chuckled. "I'm here because you passed out drunk last night."

My eyes widened. Oh crap! Was I seriously that bad? Oh no, Carly's going to murder me! I better sleep with one eye open from now on. Jake caught my expression. "Relax," he laughed. "I got your back."

"How so?"

He shugged. "I told Carly I insisted on buying you a beer. You didn't approve at first but you got so annoyed then finally let me buy you a drink. Then I bought you something to eat, then you went and danced after. We went outside to get some fresh air and before we knew it, you puked out everything and just passed out."

My jaw dropped to his disbelieving story. "Jake you idiot!"

"Yeah I know. I'm not the best liar but hey, I tried. She's letting you off the hook though."

"Where is everyone else?"

"They left for the photoshoot." he shrugged.

"And they didn't wake me up?!"

"You need your sleep Bells."

I shook my head and got up. "Oh no, I'm not going to not show up this time." I ran to my closet and pulled out a pair of black skinny jeans, a short sleeved red collared blouse and a white vest with white pumps. I still loved fashion. Carly and the crew would make us wear our custom made slut clothes when we were on tour, making music videos and anything that has to do with making public appearances. Other than that, we liked to dress in normal comfortable clothes. I hated dressing like I was looking for something to do at night.

"Bells just stay home today. Don't stress yourself out." Jake shouted as I quickly ran into the bathroom and took a very quick shower. I quickly got dressed and straightened my hair. I was good to go.

I came out and grabbed my purse and keys. "You coming or what?" I stood in the doorway, Jake started walking towards me.

He shook his head. "Nah I can't. I have my own shoot to go to later on and I'm going back to Forks to spend Christmas with Billy." Billy, his father, refused to live in L.A like Jake did. He was old enough to get a place of his own but Billy didn't want to leave Forks and his family there so he stayed behind.

"Oh, okay. Happy holidays Jake and thanks for everything." I gave him a quick peck on the lips and hugged him. "I'll miss you." We hung out sometimes. We were a thing to talk about in magazines and newspapers. But we never really went out. We were just hanging out a lot that people started to jump to conclusions thinking we were dating. He was my best friend, I could never date him again.

"Yeah it's no problem. S'all good. Happy holidays to you too." he smiled back.

We walked downstairs. "Bye Belinda and everyone!" I shouted and they shouted back. I walked to the garage and climed into my red camero. I loved this car to death. Jake climed into his car too and we both rolled down our windows and waved goodbye to eachother.

* * *

I made it to the studio. Thankfully they just started. Apparently they were running late so our time was changed. I apolgized to everyone and explained what happened. They forgave me so easily. I wondered why. Usually Carly would have a spazz attack and she didn't care where she was doing it. Maybe it was just because Christmas was coming around and they were keeping their spirits up. Or maybe I was just lucky this time. Nope, definitely because it was almost Christmas.

We weren't asked to change our clothes. Exquisite was the only magazine who loved our style besides our Toxique clothing. They asked us to pose a couple of times so they could get enough pictures to cover two-three pages of us. Then came the interviews. They asked if they could do individual interviews instead of a group one. I kind of liked that idea. Now people could see how each of us think differently. Rose went first, then it was Alice and then it was me.

We were in a private room. The seats were comfortable. The girl, Janice, introduced herself before asking me questions.

We started off with basic conversation. "So, how are you?"

"I'm great, thank you for having me here." I smiled. I loved doing interviews with this magazine company.

"Well, it's a pleasure. You know you girls are our favourites!" she grinned.

I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. "You're our favourite too."

"Well, we're glad to hear that. So, continuing with the questions, tell us about Toxique's new album release."

"Well, the album was specially made for Febuary 14th, which is Valentine's day. It's a collection of our love songs. Each of us wrote 4 songs and recorded them. The album is just basically songs about our feelings. Rose's songs are about her love for Emmett and Alice's is the same for Jasper's and well, you get it. We put a lot of time and thought into this album so hopefully our fans would like to hear something different. Our previous albums were all songs you could dance rapidly too and have different meanings. These songs are slow and have emotion in them. So hopefully the album will turn out successfully."

Janice nodded. "And, one of the songs from the album have already been released about a week ago. Tell us about that song."

I gulped. Uh-oh. "Well, the song is called _Green Eyes_. This is actually one of the songs I wrote. It just talks about a girl who falls in love with this guy and she's just sitting there and thinking of their firsts. First day they met, first arguement, first kiss etc. But then one day, she sees him with another girl and she feels like the world turned against her and he apologizes to her and tells her that he loves her. She struggles at first because she can't find the trust she needs but she forgives him because she sees the honesty behind his green eyes. She sees everything. So, yeah. It's just a song with a lot of emotion. It just shows that not everybody's perfect. We all make mistakes but find a way to make up for it. The love she has for him would never die. She could trust him again not to leave her for the second time. It just brought the two of them closer. His green eyes says it all."

"Ah yes, when I first saw the video, I literally cried," she chuckled. "It showed so much emotion! That song is truely one of my favourites. I cannot wait to hear the other songs in the album. Anyway, enough of my babbling, are the songs you wrote based on anything particular in your life or just anything you hear about?"

"Um, yeah, it's what a lot of people are going through. We like to write songs that people can relate to. Just to show that we're not in anyway perfect as the media says we are."

She asked me another set of questions before concluding the interview. "Thank you Bella for being here today. We look forward to the CD release and tour. Goodbye." Janice shook my hand and I kindly signed the poster she took out. It was a picture of the group. I noticed Alice and Rose signed it too.

I made my way out of the room, joining Alice, Rose and Carly. "Are we good to go girls?" Carly asked.

"Yeah." We nodded and left the building.

I got into my car as the three of them shared a limo. I beat them to the house just by 5 minutes.

We helped Rose bring down her luggage into the limo. She had already packed this morning while I was sleeping. We couldn't come with her. So we had to say goodbye at the house.

"Bells I want you to stay off the alchol during the holidays." Rose said.

I rolled my eyes. "That was once in ten months. I'll be on my best behaviour."

"I'll call you guys as soon as I get there."

"We'll miss you." Alice and I said as we watched Rose get into the limo.

"Love you guys!" Rose blew us a kiss before the driver closed her door and went back to the front and drove away.

"Come on Bells, let's go pack!" Alice squealed. Packing to Alice meant sorting out her wardrobe and picking out outfits she thought were so two days ago. This also meant a trip to go shopping. Oh boy.

* * *

We spent two hours packing. I was finally done and brought my suitcases down the stairs. I went into the kitchen and joined Carly, Dave and Carl. I sat on the seat. "Hey guys."

Carly threw two newspapers in front of me and 4 different magazines. I was on the front cover of all of them. They all had pictures of me, drunk, last night. "Bella, these are only 6 of the billion magazines and newspapers you are on." Carly said, disappointed.

"I know," I sighed. "I'm so sorry."

"Bella you cannot drink to make your problems disappear." Carl said.

"It will only lead to something worse." Dave added.

"I didn't know what got into me, I'm sorry guys. I must be an embaressment to you. Really, I'm sorry." I don't want Carly to send me to rehab again.

"It's okay Bella but please try to control yourself next time. We won't stop you from drinking but please limit the amount you drink."

I nodded. "Thank you." I got up from my chair and met Alice at the door.

She had a big grin on her face. "What's it now Alice?"

"We're going Christmas shopping!" She jumped up and down. "Hurry! The mall's are closing soon!" She grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me to her car.

"I got Belinda and Anthony to put our luggage in my trunk. So we're good to go." she grinned as I got into the passanger seat.

"I can't wait to get to the mall! It's going to be so much fun! Hm, what should we get for Carlisle? And Esme? And Emmett..." She babbled on and on as I tuned her out and played around with the radio, just nodding at her every 10 seconds.Christmas shopping with Alice was fun at times but, it was endless! She was lucky I was a good friend. Otherwise I would of yelled at her back there. The things I do for Alice.

* * *

**Hope this chap didnt disappoint you.**

**:)**

**A question you've all been asking: IS EDWARD GOING TO SHOW UP SOON?  
Answer: YES!  
And what happened with A/J & EM/R?  
A: They're still together don't worry ;)**


	3. Until I Get Over You

**Thank you to all who reviewed :) & Hugs to our readers.  
Just to let you guys know, yes this story will be sad..  
We like writing stories with so much emotion because we can relate to it.  
But it'll all work out in the end. So we hope we wont disappoint you.  
anywhoo, enjoy!**

* * *

Christmas shopping only took about 4 hours and then the mall closed. I was so glad it was a Sunday and the malls closed at 5pm. But Alice made good use of four hours. We were just stuffing her trunk and the back seats full of bags. There were people at the mall who were volunteering to wrap Christmas presents for donations. So, Alice got them to wrap up a total of 53 presents for just her family and friends. Everytime we went into a store, she would always find something she liked and would buy it. So everyone had more than 5 presents from Alice.

I only bought two presents for each person. We dropped off my present for Charlie at his house even if he wasn't home. We then made a stop to our house and dropped off presents for all the housekeepers and Carly. We stayed for a while, then we mailed Rose and Serena their presents. It was about 7:30pm when we finished dropping off presents. After that we went to a resturant for dinner. We were also attacked by screaming fans. We got to meet and talk to a few fans which was really awesome. We left the resturant at 10:30. Now we were on the road to Orange County.

In the corner of my eyes, I could see Alice open her mouth to say something but, then shut it. "Alice say what you want to say." I didn't look at her. I kept my eyes on the window.

"Why did you drink last night? You were doing fine." She said slowly.

I sighed. "I know I was."

"Was it Edward?"

"I don't know... I guess so. I was thinking about him and before I knew it, I went through so many drinks and passed out."

"Well the last thing you said before falling was Edward's name." How did she know? Did I really say that?

"H-Wh-How do you know?"

"Well, it's all over the news and on youtube. Some people got a video of it." She shrugged like it was no big deal.

I put my hands on my face. "Oh no!" That's got to be the most embaressing thing.

Alice put one hand on my shoulder, the other on the wheel. "Don't worry B. I'm sure he misses you too."

"Do you really think so?" I whispered. After not picking up my phone calls all these years, I was beginning to think he moved on.

"I know so," she grinned. "I bet you a thousand red M&Ms he does."

The image of Alice buying a mountain of M&Ms and sorting out the red ones and counting each of them one by one until she reached a thousand was priceless. "Deal." I grinned.

She gasped. "I was kidding!"

I stuck my tongue out at her childishly and played with the radio. Every song that came on was a slow, love song. I hated that. It's like I can't go anywhere without something reminding me of him. I sighed in defeat and layed back against the seat, closing my eyes. This was going to be a long trip. Might as well get my sleep now.

Alice woke me up half an hour later for a break. She stopped at the nearest Starbucks. I ordered my usual- grande vanilla bean frappuccino and blueberry muffin. Alice's favourite was the caramel frappuccino. When we got our orders, we couldn't get back to the car. We were surrounded by screaming fans. We took the time to sign autographs and take photos. When everyone was satisfied, we ran to the car.

"Your turn to drive." She threw me her keys.

"Alice I don't know where to go."

"That's what the map's for silly. Plus, it's not hard from here. It's about a few more minutes. All you do is go straight down the highway." She got into the passanger seat.

I groaned and got in the driver's seat. I took a big sip of my frapp, I was glad I got the biggest size. I was going to need a lot of caffeine for this drive. Alice explained how to get onto the highway from here. She was right, it wasn't hard at all.

I drove down the highway at a careful speed. She soon fell asleep and I was on my own. Before she drifted to sleep, she told me to exit at a certain sign. I watched out for it everytime I passed a set of signs. I hated driving at night. Especially on the highway.

I played around with the radio again. I put it on z103.5 and my song was playing. I quietly sang to the words as memories of Edward flashed into my mind. I wondered if he would actually be there. I was tired of just seeing pictures. I needed to see him in person. It's been four years since I've last seen him. So why did my heart still skip a beat and pump faster whenever someone would say his name? And seeing his name on almost every girl's shirt was no help at all. But the question I asked myself the most was will I ever get over him? Impossible.

* * *

I pulled up on the Cullen's driveway. The house was still big and beautiful. I looked over at Alice who was still asleep. "Alice wake up." I said and poked her a couple times.

Her eyes fluttered open. "Hmm?"

"We're here." I grinned. We were finally here.

She unbuckled her seatbelt. "What time is it?"

I shrugged. "Probably around 4 in the morning."

"It's Christmas eve." She grinned.

The both of us opened the door and took a look at the beautiful mansion like home in front of us. "It's good to be home." She sighed.

She was right, it was. Her family was like family to me as well. I never really had the experience of being in a real family. Not even when Charlie and Renee were still together. Charlie was a director ever since Rose and I were born so he wasn't usually around. Renee was always busy too so we never really saw her. Except for mornings when she'd drive us to school and pick us up after. Then she'd go back to work. Honestly, all I could say was, I don't even know Renee. We never had mother-daughter time. I hardly knew her. But I was glad Rose was taking the oppurtunity to get to know her, Phil and Alexis.

I helped Alice carry our luggage and into the house. Everyone was asleep except for Emmett. I quietly tiptoed into the living room, where he was watching a movie and surprised him. He jumped up and turned around. "Bells!" He jumped over the sofa and lifted me into a bear hug. I have to say, I truely missed his hugs.

"Shh! Emmett you'll wake everyone!" I whispered.

"Oh, right. Sorry. I miss you Bells!" He whispered back and put me down.

"I missed you to Thing 1." I grinned and remembered the day at the mall. Me, Emmett and Jasper went to the mall one day during our lunch period and bought Thing shirts. Ah, the memories.

"Pst! Guys I need help here!" Alice hissed from the doorway.

We gave eachother another hug before joining Alice. Emmett took care of our luggage while Alice and I grabbed the bags filled with presents.

"Wow, Alice is like the girl version of Santa Clause." Emmett grinned and looked at all her bags.

"Shut up Em." Alice hissed.

I rolled my eyes at the two. It was definitely great to be back. We carried the presents back to the living room. In the corner, there was a gigantic Christmas tree. It was so beautiful! It was decorated with various ornaments and different coloured lights. Stockings hung above the fireplace. There was already gifts under the glowing tree and Alice added another 53 to the collection. The tree was beginning to look small with Alice's mountain of presents underneath it. I joined her and Emmett as I took out my presents and layed them underneath.

"We need another tree." Emmett said, looking at the mountains of wrapped boxes.

I pulled out my last present, reading the label. It was for Edward. I didn't know what to get him so his gift was home made. It was a collection of poems and songs I wrote for him. Also, pictures from our past and letters I wrote to him four years ago when I still called him. I figured I would send him letters if he didn't want to answer my calls. I wrote a total of 365 letters. One letter for each day I missed him. I never sent him them. When I got the idea that he moved on, I gave up but continued writing. I only wrote for one year. I was getting tired of writing stupid love letters when he would never read them. But I kept them all just in case. I set it down in the back of the tree and sighed.

"Bella you should get some sleep." Alice yawned.

I nodded, even if I wasn't tired at all. Emmett carried my bags up the stairs and into the guest bedroom. I sat on the bed and crossed my legs. I wanted to ask him about Edward but I was afraid of getting an answer I wish I hadn't heard. Instead I let him go. "Thanks for helping me Em. Goodnight." I smiled.

"No problem. Night Bells," he said, closing the door. "Oh and Bells, it's good to have you back." He grinned.

I returned the smile. "It's good to be here too." He smiled again and shut the door.

I changed into my PJs and cleaned myself up. I pulled out my iPod and plugged in my earphones. I put on my favourite playlist, a list of songs that I can relate to. I layed on my bed and thought for a while. I eagerly wondered if Edward was here in his room. I debated on whether or not I should go take a peak in his room. I made my final decision after spending minutes on deciding.

I took my iPod with me and set it on low volume, using it as a flashlight. I walked down the dark hallway. His room was three doors down on the left. I breathed in and out slowly. My heart rate increased. I was now infront of his door. What if I woke him? I looked at the time on my iPod. It was 6:02AM. I was thinking for that long?

I carefully opened the door wide enough to stick my head in. I took a deep breathe. _Relax Bella, _I thought. If he's there, he's there. If he's not, you shouldn't be surprised. I closed my eyes and breathed in slowly and out deeply. I stuck my head in anxiously. He wasn't there.

A wave of disappointment and sadness splashed over me. I pushed the door open even more and let myself in. I closed the door securely behind me.

I looked around at his room. His walls were painted my favourite shade of blue. He had the same bed as the one in the guest room-queen sized with a black headboard. His sheets looked as if they've never been touched in years. I looked at the picture frames on his shelves. There were pictures of him when he was younger. Even back then he didn't comb his messy bronze hair. There were pictures of him, Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Jas, Rose, Alice and even me. I picked up a picture of him playing the piano. He was older in the picture, probably 16 at the time. I didn't know he had an interest in instruments. Edward always surprised me. In a good way. I wondered if he still played.

And lastly, I found a picture of me on his night stand. It was taken on picture day at the academy. So we could get our school ID cards. I looked the same as I do now. Nothing changed about me. Except I died my hair a darker shade of brown with a tint of red. Besides that, I still looked like the same old Bella in this picture. I was surprised he kept this.

I put the frame down and layed on his bed. I couldn't believe I had my hopes up. I should of known he wouldn't show up. Why was I jumping to conclusions? There was always tomorrow right? Even if tomorrow was Christmas. Or the day after. Maybe luck would turn around for me and he'd show up for New Year's. Oh who am I kidding? Edward probably wanted nothing to do with me and here I was desperately thinking of the days I would see him again. When was I going to just give up?

Never. If not seeing him for four years didn't stop me, what makes me think I would stop now? There will always be a part of my heart that belonged to him. Scratch that, not a part but, whole. I remembered his last words when he gave me the bracelet. _Take care of my heart, I'm leaving it with you. _I smiled at his words and looked down at the diamond heart that belonged to his family. He loved me enough to pass it on to me. I looked after it like it was my life. I never lost it. I never misplaced it. I took it with me everywhere I went. It was the only thing I had left of him. Great, now I'm making it sound like he passed away.

I slapped myself mentally. How could I think of that?! I turned up the volume on my iPod. The song, _Until I Get Over You_ was playing. It was an old song but, still one of my favourites. I closed my eyes and listened to the words carefully.

_Woke up today, thinking of you.  
__Another night that I made my way through.  
__So many dreams still left in my mind,  
__But they can never come true.__I press rewind and I remember when,  
__I close my eyes and I'm with you again  
__But in the end I could still feel the pain,  
__Everytime I hear your name.__The sun won't shine since you went away,  
__Seems like the rain's falling everyday.  
__There's just one heart where there once was two,  
__But that's the way it's gotta be,__Until I get over you.__Walked through the park in the evening air  
__I heard a voice and I thought you were there,  
__I run away but, I just can't escape  
__Memories of you everywhere__They say that time will dry the tears,  
__But true love burns for a thousand years,  
__Give my tomorrows for one yesturday,  
__Just to know that I could have you here.__The sun won't shine since you went away,  
__Seems like the rain's falling everyday,  
__There's just one heart where there once was two,  
__That's the way it's gotta be,__Until I get over you__When will this river of tears stop falling,  
__Where can I run so I won't feel alone,  
__Can't walk away when the pain keeps calling,  
__I just got to take it from here on my own,  
__But it's so hard to let go.__The sun won't shine since you went away,  
__Seems like the rain's falling everyday  
,__There's just one heart where there once was two,  
__That's the way it's gotta be, __Until I get over you.  
__That's the way it's gotta be, until I get over you,  
'__Til I get over you..._

I put the song on shuffle. It played numerous of times until the music started fading as I drifted to sleep, dreaming of Edward Cullen for the millionth time.

* * *

I woke up to the sound of booming laughter coming from downstairs. No doubt the laughter was coming from Emmett. I swear he could create an earthquake if he tried to make his laugh any louder. I slipped my feet into my favourite comfortable pair of Uggs and walked downstairs to join them.

"Hey sleepy." Emmett grinned as I walked into the kitchen and sat beside him.

"Goodafternoon Bella, it's so good to see you again." Esme kissed my cheek and hugged me.

Afternoon? "It's good to see you too Esme." I smiled back.

I looked at Carlisle. He still looked like the movie-star actor he should be, instead he was the doctor of the country every nurse just drooled over. "Hello Bella. It's a pleasure to see you again. How are you?" He asked.

"I'm great, thank you. I'm so glad to be here." I grinned and looked around the kitchen shyly.

"Would you like something to eat dear? You've been asleep for quite a while." A while? How long?

"Oh, how long was I out for?"

Emmett shrugged. "Well, I heard you go to Edward's room," I looked down, trying to hide my blush. "And when I looked at the clock it was like 6 in the morning and it's 5 in the afternoon so yeah that long."

"Oh, sorry. I couldn't sleep last night."

"We couldn't blame you for being so tired," Carlisle smiled. "But hopefully you won't be tired enough to stay up with us tonight."

"Oh yes, we're having company over," Esme said. "I hope you don't mind it's a last minute warning. Every Christmas we have a few family and friends over and we all open presents at midnight."

I shook my head. "No I don't mind at all. It sounds like fun. I can't wait."

"Yes, it is. Well, Esme and I have to step out for a bit and pick up a few things and people. We'll be back by 8 and the party starts at about 9. So you kids stay put and start decorating the house." Carlisle said and picked up his keys.

I nodded. "I'll try not to burn the house down." Emmett grinned.

Esme rolled her eyes. "Emmet, I'm serious."

"Mom, relax."

Esme kissed the top of Emmett's head and then mine. "I love you both. Tell Alice goodbye for me." Esme ran to the door and out with Carlisle.

"Speaking of Alice, where is she?"

"I think she's picking up Jasper from the airport." Emmett shrugged.

I gasped. "No way! Jas is coming to? Sweet! The whole family's here..." I trailed off. "Well, most of them."

"Sorry Bells. He called and said he couldn't make it."

Why was I surprised to hear that? "Yeah, I kind of figured that."

"He still loves you too Bells." He tried to lighten up my mood.

"Sure," I denied it. "When I see it, I'll believe it."

"What about your song Green Eyes?" He asked.

"It's just a song Emmett. Anyone can relate to it."

"But I bet the inspiration came from Edward." He said slowly.

"Only I would know," I didn't want to continue discussing this subject. "Come on, we should get started before Esme comes home."

He nodded and picked up a peice of paper from the table. A list, I assumed. He read out the list. "Okay, I'll take care of baking, I'm not so sure Esme would want you to do something involving a stove," I chuckled. "And you take care of the decorations she left us."

"Ok, let's do this!" He punched his fists together and walked out of the kitchen.

I took out Esme's holiday recipes book and began making the white chocolate cake from the book. It looked delicious and I hope it turned out like that but, tasted even better.

As soon as I put the cake into the oven I got started on the cookies. Esme noted that she wanted 24 shortbread cookies, 24 chocolate chip cookies and 12 white chocolate chip cookies. So many cookies to make! I quickly got started before complaning.

Luckily the Cullen's had an oven that was big enough to fit all batches inside. I set the timer on the oven so that it would turn off at the exact time. In case I forgot to check up on it. After I cleaned up I joined Emmett in the living room.

Walking into the living room was like walking in a winter wonderland. The room was filled with so much Christmas spirit. Snowflake decorations hung from the ceiling, there were red, white and green streamers flowing all over the room, there was a Nativity scene set up against the back wall. Everything was just so perfect. "Wow Em. You got skills?" I laughed.

"Yeah, apparently. From the look on your face, I do." He grinned proudly.

"How do you know I was shocked about the sight, maybe I still get that vomitting feeling everytime I look at you." I joked.

He chuckled and punched fists with me. "When did you become so mean?"

"Since when did you care?" I shot back.

"I totally rubbed off on you four years ago and you used that as something to remind you of me." He grinned.

I rolled my eyes. "Sure," I played along. "You totally rubbed off on me. I'll give you credit for that."

He chuckled and shook his head. "So how's baking coming along?" He breathed in the air around him. "Mm, I could almost taste it." He licked his lips.

"Still the same hungry Emmett I see? It should be done soon. The timer will go off."

"Alright, well I'm going to get ready. They should be back soon."

"Wait, exactly who is coming?"

"Some of our aunts, uncles, baby cousins and Jasper."

"Oh okay. I'll get ready too."

I climbed the stairs and went into my room. What was I going to wear? But that didn't matter to me right now. I sat on the hard wooden floor. Maybe, just maybe, if I wished hard enough, he would show up.

* * *

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	4. Appreciate

**Oh my, reviews are going down!  
First Chap- 53 Reviews, 2nd- 27 and 3rd- 20 :O!  
But just 'cause we love you guys... Here's another chapter (:  
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**--**

I cleaned myself up before getting into my favourite white haltered dress. The dress ended mid-thigh and hung freely from my legs. It didn't stick to my thighs like all the other dresses Alice would make me wear. I curled my hair and clipped it back so that only my bottom layers were down. I straightened my bangs to the side and applied my makeup.

I finished the outfit with candycane earrings and wooden heels that had red straps to tie around my ankle. I looked very Christmas-y tonight.

My phone rang and I ran over to the night stand and picked it up.

"Hello?"

_"Hey B! Just calling to say Merry Christmas."_

"Rose! Hey, you too! How's Phoneix?"

_"It's great. Alexis is so adorable! You have to come see her soon! Oh and Renee sends her best wishes. So does Phil."_

"Yeah, I'll see her soon hopefully and oh, uh, tell them Merry Christmas too."

_"Yeah I will. Anyway, we have to go. We're going to sing Christmas carols at this place Renee always goes to."_

"Oh, sounds like fun. See you soon. Take care Rose."

_"Yeah you too. Love you sis."_

"Love you too."

_"Wait! Tell Emmett Merry Christmas and I love him so much."_

I laughed. "Yeah don't worry. Bye." I hung up.

I could hear the guest starting to arrive. It was no big deal, if I could face going on stage in front of hundreds of people, I could face seeing the Cullen's other family members. I took another look at myself in the mirror. I looked decent enough.

I sighed and slowly made my way down the stairs. Then I realized I forgot to take the cookies out. I jogged down the stairs and into the kitchen. I saw that Esme had already taken care of the cake. She was on to the cookies. "Oh, Esme. Let me do that." I said.

"Oh no sweetie, it's okay I got it."

"No, I insist. It was my responsibility."

"Oh she's such a sweetheart." a lady next to her said.

"Bella I've got it. You deserve a break," Esme smiled at me. "Bella I'd like you to meet my sister Kait, Kait this is Bella, I'm sure you know her from the group Toxique with Alice."

"Ah, yes! Bella Swan. It's nice to finally meet you. I've seen you on T.V and your big movie. You are a very inspiring actress and song writer." She had the same smile as Esme. Her hair was black and curly though but I could see the resemblence.

I blushed at her comment. "Thank you."

"Bella why don't you go join Alice and Emmett in the family room."

I nodded. "Sure," then I looked at Kait. "It was nice meeting you." I waved and exited the kitchen.

Emmett was chasing around toddlers. Two of them were girls and the last was a boy. They were adorable. "Hey Bells!" Emmett yelled.

It was hard to believe he was 21 years old. It seemed like he was an 8 year old boy trapped in the body of a 21 year old. "Hey." I chuckled.

"Hello Bella." I turned around and threw my arms around his neck.

"Jas! I missed you so much!"

I let go of him. "Same with me Bells," he chuckled. "It's not the same having a Trio day with just me and Emmett."

"Yeah well, we'll make up a new day."

"Oh Bella you look gorgeous as always!" Alice said, with one of the girls in her hands.

I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. "Thanks. You too. Who's this?" I pointed to the girl.

"Oh this is Marina, our little cousin. She's three years old, that," she pointed to the other girl, "Is Karina, her sister. She's two years old and the little handsome boy is our other cousin, Tristian. He's the same age as Marina."

I bent down and picked up Karina. "Aw, she's the most adorable asian baby I have ever seen!" I cooed.

Alice laughed. "Yeah, our aunt is Filipino. Karina has her genetics and Marina has her dad's that's why they look different."

Karina randomly burst into laughter and placed her tiny hand on my nose. "Aw, she's so cute!"

"Karina sweetie!" A beautiful lady appeared infront of me. She was a bit shorter than I was and had long black hair. Karina started laughing and threw her arms around the lady. I let go of her as the lady took her in her arms.

"Hi, I'm Bella." I tried to make conversation.

"Hello, I'm Sabrina. I'm Marina and Karina's mom." She smiled back.

I adored her asian eyes. "It's nice to meet you."

"Same with you. I hope Karina hasn't caused you any trouble?" She cooed at her baby.

"Oh no, she was perfectly fine. No trouble at all."

"Ah, I see. Well, I have to go feed her. It was nice meeting you." she waved.

"You too."

"Oh Bella, Esme was asking if you and I could sing a few Christmas songs for everyone later on tonight." Alice said.

"Oh sure no problem. Just tell me when."

Alice gave the baby to Jasper. "Jas we'll be back."

"Alright." The both of them kissed eachother on the lips. You know, they haven't broken up once since they started dating. I wish I had the faith she had. Nothing could break them apart.

Alice took me by the hand and led me to her room. I needed sunglasses just being in her room. Everything was neon coloured. Her walls were hot pink. Her sheets were bright yellow. Ugh. I was in Alice's 'preppyland'.

"Ok we need to plan out what we're singing." She took out her song book.

"Uh, Christmas carols?"

"No really. We kind of established that but, which songs?"

"How many songs do we need to sing anyway?"

She thought for a moment. "Well we start at 11:40 and end at 11:55." Pointless but okay...

"Ok then why don't we sing Jingle Bell Rock or something?" Was choosing Christmas carols that hard?

"Or..." Alice grinned widely.

"What now?" I groaned.

"We could put on a big show!" She sang, with the large grin still on her face.

"Alice, no," I shook my head. "I'm putting my foot down!" Wasn't performing for a large crowd almost everyday enough torture?

Alice literally dropped to her knees. "Oh Bella please! It'd be so much fun!"

"No Alice!"

"Please?" She sang.

"No."

"For me?"

"Nope."

"For Rose?"

"Nope."

"For Edward?"

Ugh! "N...ope."

"Ok what about Serena?"

"What about her?"

"You know, that time...her father?"

I sighed in defeat. "Only for Serena!" Stupid powerful pixie! "But what does that issue have to do with Christmas?"

She shot me a look like I was stupid. "Bella, you know she kind of lost him during the holidays."

"Alright, alright fine."

"Good 'cause I already called the newsreporters. They're on their way." She grinned.

"Alice!" I hissed. "What are the newsreporters going to do?"

"Well I want everyone to see this. It's kind of a special thing you know. And I especially want Serena and her family to see it."

"So you basically just tricked me into playing a live show?"

She shot me an innocent face. "A live show? Gee, Bella, why didn't I think of that? Now I'm leaving your room before you could say anything!" She had already skipped off out of her room.

The things Alice made me do... but, this was for Serena and her family right?

Alice tapped her mic a few times and cleared her throat. "Good evening everyone."

Everyone stopped what they were doing and took their seats. Alice organized the seats into rows and made a mini stage for us. Typical Alice once again.

After Alice gave her introduction speech we started off with six Christmas carols. Then Alice sang a song called _My Grown Up Christmas List. _It was 11:50PM when she finished. Since the timing wasn't exact, we extended it until my song was over.

I sat down at the grand piano in the corner. "I'd like to dedicate this song to one of our sisters, our best friend, Serena Welsford. Her father, Tyler Welsford, died in a car accident during the holidays on Serena's sweet sixteen. He was driving home from work one night, he was eager to get home to surprise Serena. After getting off the phone with her mom, to confirm plans, he got into an accident. The other driver, who was drunk, ran a red stoplight and crashed into Serena's dad. It was such a horrible experience for her. She waited all night for him to come home, it was tradition for them to stay up until midnight for her birthday. Can you imagine waiting endessly for your dad to come home and when he never shows up, it was because he was in the hospital? I can't imagine what she went through but, we're all here for her. So, this song goes out to her and her family."

I started playing the keys to the song _Appreciate. _It wasn't written by me but, it was one of my favourites. The song was exactly about Serena's situation. It's sad that others went through the same time. I started to sing the words slowly.

_There's a, man dying on the side of the road,  
__Won't make it home tonight.  
__He was, driving fast on his cellular phone,  
That's how he lived his life.  
__Ooh, while he was hanging by a thread,  
__These were the final words he said,_

_My girl turns sweet sixteen today,  
__She's beautiful, so beautiful.  
__It might get rough sometimes,  
__But I hope she keeps her faith.  
__I wish I grabbed the chance to say to her,  
__Life is too short so take that time and appreciate._

I started crying before I could finish the chorus. Alice sat down beside me and started singing the rest of the song. I continued to hit the keys but everything was becoming a blurr. I quickly wiped my tears away so I could continue playing. I wasn't going to ruin this for Serena.

I could see the camera crew surrounding me, capturing this every moment. I wondered if Serena was watching right now. If anyone was.

Alice sang the last chorus and I joined in with her. Everybody clapped when we were finished. I wiped my final tear. "Bella, Alice may we have a minute?" A newsreporter asked.

"Sure." We got up from the seat and waved to everyone.

"We'll be back." Alice told our audience.

We went into the guest room. The newsreporter and camera man followed. We sat on the sofas. "We're here live at the Cullen residence in O.C. Many of you have seen this wonderful show your favourite popstars, Bella Swan and Alice Cullen, have performed. Now," she turned to us, "What gave you the idea to put on a show for Christmas?"

"Well, I just thought we could take the time and send out a message to everyone. I also wanted to share part of my Christmas with everyone out there." Alice said.

"I didn't know Alice planned this out. She just tricked me into saying yes. But, now I was glad I did it. I hope Serena and her family watched this and know that they have our support 100 percent." I smiled to the camera.

"Is there anything you'd like to say?"

"Um, I'd like to say Merry Christmas to everyone. I hope the best for you guys. And just, take care and be safe. Take the time to appreciate God's greatest gifts to you. Your family, your friends and especially Jesus."

Alice nodded in agreement. "And a Happy New Year to you all! We can't wait to start our tour and see you all again!"

"Well, that's it for today. Everyone have a safe holiday. I'm Belanie Smith, out!"

The camera stopped rolling. I looked at the clock. It was three minutes before midnight. "Well, thank you for having us here today. We'll be going now." Belanie said and walked out with the camera guy behind her.

"Come on, let's go open presents!" Alice cheered.

I followed behind her and back into the living room. Everyone started handing out their presents to one another. Alice and I did the same.

"10, 9, 8, 7!" Everyone started counting down. I closed my eyes and made the wish I've been wishing for years. I wouldn't stop trying until it came true.

"3...2...1! Merry Christmas!" We all hugged eachother. The other kids started opening up their presents. Gift wrap flew everywhere and onto the ground.

I watched as everyone opened up their presents. They were all so happy, they were getting everything they always wanted. "Wow mom, dad!" A little boy said. "This is the best gift ever!"

I couldn't help but smile. "Why aren't you joining everyone?" Jasper sat down beside me.

I shrugged. "I'll open my presents later."

He handed me a small rectangular box. "Well here's another to add onto your stash." he smiled.

"Thanks." I picked up a box from underneath my chair. "This is for you."

He tore off the wrapping paper and threw it on the ground like a five year old. He opened the cover and pulled out a red and blue shirt. "Spiderman? Nice."

I laughed. "I thought of a new day."

"Hm, would that be superhero day?"

I nodded. "It's childish but hey, age is just a number."

"I think I got you the right gift then." He grinned.

I was curious. I opened the box and pulled out a black hat with ears on top. "Ha! No way! Batman?!" I put the hat on.

"There's more." he pointed to the belt.

I pulled the belt out. It was black and had the bat sign as the buckle. "Ha no way! I love it Jas!" I gave him a hug.

"No problem."

Emmett sat beside us and handed me a box. I decided to open it as well. I pulled out a black shirt with Shane's face on it. I read the words aloud._ "Mrs. Edward Cullen."_ I shot him a death glare. "Very funny Emmett."

"Oh come on! You know it's true." He winked.

I rolled my eyes and threw my present at him. He put on the red and white striped zipup hoodie and the non perscription circled eye glasses. "Mommy I found Waldo!" the little boy shouted and pointed to Emmett. We all laughed.

"I love it Bells!"

"Oh and I got you something else. It's somewhere... I gave it to you earlier."

"Oh yeah, the blue tights and red cape? Superman Bells?"

I laughed. "Superhero day!"

"We all have something from a superhero." Jasper said.

"Cool! Can't wait to wear those tights!" Emmett grinned.

"Oh gosh, what have I gotten ourselves into? By the way Rose says Merry Christmas and that she loves you."

"Yeah, called her earlier. Man I miss her. I should go call her again now." They haven't broken up either. I was the only messed up one here. I regretted it. Everything.

We cleaned up fourty five minutes later. All the guests were leaving except for Jasper and I took the time to say goodbye to them. When the driveway was cleared, I decided to stay out for a little bit and have a smoke. I lit up my cig and sat down on their driveway and looked up at the cloudy sky as it started to rain. What a rainy ending given to a perfect day.

"Bella! There you are! I've been looking all over for you!" Alice sat down beside me.

"Come on you should go inside, the rains pouring harder." she said. "And don't you want to open your presents?"

"I'll open them later." I shook my head and blew out one puff of smoke before stepping on my cig.

"Ok but, I have one more present to give you and you have to open it right away."

"Alice!" I groaned. "You've already given me a lot. I don't think I could take another."

"Bella, you have to take this one. You'll love it. I promise."

"No," I sighed. "I don't want presents right now. Give it to Rose or someone."

"Bella what's wrong?"

"He didn't show up." I whispered.

"Oh Bella, he will. I promise you."

I shook my head. "Alice I waited four years. Four years felt like forever. It hurt when he never picked up my calls or answered my emails. You know how much pain I went through? Just for one guy who probably moved on by now. I was stupid to leave. I lost something that I could probably never find again Alice. I've been a screw up. I can't seem to run away from all of this when the pain just keeps coming back. Everywhere I go, everything I see or hear just reminds me of him. He's always on my mind and I don't think that could ever change. I miss him Alice. It's just, I wish he could at least give me a call so I know how he's doing. So I wouldn't have to worry about him everyday," I started crying. How pathetic. Alice rubbed my back slowly. "I didn't think he would actually ignore me."

"He's not ignoring you Bella."

Lies. "Then why hasn't he called for the past four years?" I sobbed.

"He was doing you a favor. He was helping you move on." Alice pulled me into a hug.

"But clearly I haven't. Why would he want me to move on if he loved me?"

"Because he didn't want you to stay miserable all your life. He wanted you to move on and be happy where you were."

"He knows my drinking issues Alice. Don't you think he'd get the clue?"

"Bella can we not talk about this right now? It's pouring out here. You'll get sick."

"I want to stay."

Alice got up. "Bella will you please come inside? I want to give you your present."

"Give it to me later Alice!"

"If you won't come to the present then I guess the present will have to come to you." She ran inside.

What was the deal with Alice and her present? It was probably another hot pink sparkly dress or something I'd pretend to like just to make her happy. I stood up, closed my eyes and took the moment to feel the cold rain against my skin.

"Bella turn around." Alice said.

I turned around with my eyes still closed. "Open you eyes." She demanded.

I breathed in heavily and my eyes flew open. I gasped at what was in front of me. _Who _was in front of me. He was there. I couldn't believe it.

* * *

**DUNDUNDUNNN...**

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* * *


	5. You're The Missing Peice I Need

**Yay, we're beating the number of reviews!  
Chap1-53 Reviews  
Chap2- 28 Reviews  
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Chap4- 48 Reviews; good job guys :) Let's see if we can beat that number? :)  
& Look how fast we wrote this chapter xD.**

**Moving on with the story...  
Can you guess who showed up?  
... that's right, MIKE NEWTON!  
:D and you all thought it was Edward! Ha!  
(JOKING!)**

**Warning: If you do not like sad, depressing stories we warn you to stop here. If that's not the case then please, do move on :) Just don't hate us for what happens... Enjoy!**

* * *

He was wearing all black. His bronze hair was all wet from the rain. He looked like he was shooting some type of hair gel commercial. He was beautiful as ever and was wrapped up in a large red bow. "Merry Christmas." Alice smiled.

Her present. Alice's present was him. I mouthed a 'thank you' to her as she mouthed 'your welcome' back.

I still couldn't believe it. He stood an inch away from me, smiling the smile I would die for. I reached my hand out and touched his hand, afraid that I was just in a dream and he would disappear any second now. I felt a wave of eletrical shock at the touch. The shock was back and hotter than ever. The shock I had once thought we lost back at the meadow before I left. He was really here. I threw my arms around him and hugged him tight. I never wanted to let go. I don't know how long we hugged for but, I knew I was home in his arms again.

He pulled away but kept his hands on my wrists. His green eyes locked onto me. "It's good to see you, Bella." He smiled my favourite crooked smile.

I felt weak at the sound of his voice that I fell into his arms.

* * *

When I opened my eyes, I was lying on the sofa and the face of an angel was inches away from mine. "Edward?"

"Yes Bella, I'm here." His expression was worried.

"Promise?" I smiled.

"As long as you want me here." He kissed my forehead.

I closed my eyes and smiled at his words. Edward was back and he was here to stay.

The sun seemed to be shining brighter this morning-well afternoon. I got up and brushed my teeth in the bathroom. I suddenly remembered the dream I had last night. It was just a dream but it seemed so real. Like I could feel his touch. He came back, he was my Christmas present from Alice. I remember him saying that he would stay as long as I wanted him to. I don't know what happened after that but, I know his words made my life.

It's like the walls around me were finally breaking down. I was no longer trapped with all my emotions inside. I know it was just a dream but, to hear those words coming from his mouth after four years made me feel free. The rain clouds disappeared above me and the sun was finally shining. I was happy. But I wished he would say it in person.

I joined Carlisle and Esme at the breakfast nook downstairs. "Good afternoon."

"Well, you're up early." Esme said.

"But it's like noon...everyone else is asleep?" Usually I was the last to get up.

Carlisle nodded. "Well I guess you were just to overwhelmed to stay asleep."

"Overwhelmed? How?"

Carlisle and Esme looked at eachother. "That a certain bronze haired boy showed up last night."

My eyes widened. "No!"

The both of them nodded. "No freaking way!" I grinned.

"He's upstairs in his room dear." Esme smiled at me.

I shook my head. "But...I thought...It was w-as a dream!"

Carlisle laughed. "Yes well it does seem like it doesn't it?"

"I need some coffee." I pulled out a mug and helped myself. I took a long sip. I couldn't believe it. I needed to see him.

"Well, Carlisle and I have to step out. We'll be back tonight." Esme kissed my head and grabbed her car keys.

"Have fun." I waved.

As soon as they shut the door I took another sip of coffee and ran upstairs to his room. I stopped in front of his door. What if I woke him up and he saw me peaking? Wouldn't that seem a bit too creepy? Ugh! I needed to talk to Alice.

I barged in her room. "Alice I-"

Alice screamed and covered herself up. Jasper did the same.

"Oh my gosh I'm so sorry! I should of knocked!" I ran out of her room and slammed the door. Oh crap. I'd have to find a way to burn the memory.

Emmett came out of his room with a baseball bat. "Aw man, Emmett! You still like to swing bats at people? Alright tell me how many people you've knocked out with that thing."

"Sorry I heard someone scream." He put the bat down.

"Oh yeah, that was Alice and Jas. If you ever want to go into her room I suggest you knock first."

"I don't even want to know why I have to knock." Emmett's eyes were wide.

I laughed a short laugh. "Well sorry for waking you."

"It's all good. I'll be going back to bed now. Night." He grinned and shut his door.

So, everyone was sleeping. Carlisle and Esme were out. I was all alone on a Christmas morning or afternoon in this case.

I turned around and walked down the hallway. I passed by Edward's door and had the urge to just barge in and hug him tightly. But I'd rather save myself from embaressment. I would just have to wait until he was awake.

I ran into my room and changed into a pair of sweats with a baby blue tank. I put on my white adidas and ran down the stairs. I was going to take a jog to pass time.

* * *

I started off by walking then eventually started jogging. I was so lazy today. I was going to jog to the nearest Starbucks which was like who knows how many minutes away and take a break there. Then jog or run back.

When I got to Starbucks I wondered why the doors weren't open. Then I looked at the big white sign on the door after minutes of being frusterated. Stupid me, it was Christmas day. Alright, that deserved a laugh.

I took a walk along the boardwalk. Do you think he'd be awake now? It's been twenty minutes. Hopefully when I got back he'd be up. Eager to get back, I ran as fast as I could. "Bella!" A familiar voice called my name.

Still running, I looked around for her. "Bella watch out!" She screamed again. When I turned to look forward, the next thing I knew was I was laying flat on my butt on the cold ground. I rubbed my forehead. "Ow!" That ought to leave a bump!

"Bella are you okay?!" She helped me up.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I rubbed my forehead again. I could feel the huge bump.

"Sorry I shouldn't of called you like that."

"It's all good. What are you doing here? Not that I mind. It's just wow I haven't seen you in a million years!" I walked beside her.

"Alice called me. She asked me to come by and surprise you guys... surprise!" she smiled.

I laughed and gave her a hug. "Casey I've missed you!"

"Oh me too! It's hard seeing all my best friends up on T.V with all the hot actors while I sit at home envying you guys." she shot me a playful glare.

"Ugh believe me, Hollywood's not that great. Sometimes I'd rather switch places with you."

"What do you mean?"

"Well first of all, you're always followed!" I whispered and looked around suspiciously. "Second, you hardly have time to sleep! It's like you come home at 4 in the morning and have to wake up at 7 in the morning. It's so annoying. Third, well, relationships are hard to keep up with. Example, you."

"Which reminds me," she cocked her head to the side. "how are you and Shane doing?"

I rolled my eyes. "It's all a joke. I could never date Shane."

"What?! A joke? Huh? How? Why?" She seemed a bit too nervous about something.

"Cause he's just Shane. My co-star, my friend," I emphazised the word friend. "and that's all we'll ever be."

"I don't think so," she shook her head. She still seemed nervous. She acted like she was trying to... I don't know what it's called but, it was strange. "Seems like you guys are more than just friends on T.V."

I shot her a 'what-are-you-talking-about' look. "Don't give me that look! It's so obvious you guys are flirting with eachother."

"Um hello, it's called acting out for the public. It's part of the whole Beverly Hills thing. We hang out for publicity."

"Mmmhmm..."

"Fine don't believe me."

"Fine I won't."

"Fine with me."

"So when's the wedding?" she poked me.

"Ugh!" I scowled. "Can we please change the subject?"

"Yeah, yeah."

"Oh my gosh! It's Bella Swan!" We just turned the corner and had to walk a few blocks down. I forgot I was living the dream until I turned around and saw a large group of girls and guys, mostly guys, pointing at me holding cameras and notepads.

"Run!" I told Casey. We started running as fast as we could. Only a few more houses down. We can make it! I told myself over and over again.

"Bella!" They yelled after me.

"So I see why this is number one on your list." Casey yelled.

"You think?"

"Bella! Bella! We love you Bella!" They screamed.

I quickly pulled out the keys from my pocket. "Casey shut the gate!"

Casey did as I said. Some people's hands managed to stick in, blocking Casey from shutting it closed. "Hurry Bella!"

I struggled with the keys but managed to open the door before the crowd could reach me. Casey ran in before me. When I was in I quickly slammed the door behind me and breathed in and out rapidly.

* * *

Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Edward came rushing to the door the second someone rang the doorbell. "Whatever you do," I tried catching my breath. "Don't open that door!"

"They're like some kind of animals who haven't ate in days!" Emmett stared out the window.

Casey went up to Edward and gave him a hug. It was more than a friendly hug... which got me worried.

I pulled my knees up and rested my head in between them trying to steady my breathing. "Casey!" Alice screamed.

"Hey Ali!"

I tuned out their conversation. "Emmett can you get me a glass of water?"

"Here," a velvety voice said next to me. "I've got it."

I looked up and nearly fainted-again-when I saw him. This is what I've been missing all these years. "Thanks." I took the glass from him and chugged it down in a second. "Ah." I let out a satisying sound.

"Thirsty are we?" He chuckled. My heart melted to the ground at the sweet sound of his laugh. It was like ringing bells to my ears.

"You don't know what it's like running from a large fan base. I was nearly eaten alive!"

"Actually I do," he chuckled. "Ever since the movie came out and I was known, girls have been following me everywhere. But that doesn't happen much now. They've all moved on to Shane."

Oops. I hope it didn't cause him any trouble. "Hectic isn't it?"

He nodded. "Do you want some more water?" He looked into my eyes. Gosh, I was so hypnotized. His eyes were filled with concern.

A wave of cold water splashed onto me. "What the?!" I screamed.

"Sorry," Emmett laughed. "Looked like you needed it."

"Yeah quit gazing at eachother and get off the floor already!" Jasper laughed with him.

"Sorry." I blushed. Edward helped me up.

Alice looked at me. Then to Edward. "Um, hey Emmett, Jas, Case, remember that thing we were suppose to do?"

Emmett scratched his head. "What thing?"

"That thing!" She hissed.

"Oh," Jas mouthed. "Oh yeah, well we'll be doing our thing now."

Casey gave me a thumbs up.

"Stay please." I mouthed.

She shook her head. "Please." I mouthed, begging.

"Fine."

Jas and Alice towed Emmett with them out of the house. "No one told me-" "Emmett!" The both of them hissed and shut the door.

* * *

I shook my head at Emmett's stupidity. It became quiet. Too quiet. "Can we talk?" we both said at the same time.

"You first." We said in unison again.

"No, you first." I insisted.

"Ladies first." He smiled.

"Ok seriously guys. Just talk," Casey said. "But wait," she grinned and grabbed our wrists. She brought us to the living room and set up the seats so that she was sitting in the arm chair infront of Edward and I on the sofa. "Now I get to play Doctor Casey!" She clapped. Even after years of not seeing Alice, she still had the preppyness stuck onto her. But she was like overrated happy. Something was up. I decided to continue acting like nothing was happening.

"Casey!" I groaned. "Do we have to do this?"

"Yes," she raised her eyebrow at me then turned her torso towards Edward. "Now, Edward. What were you going to say?"

"Casey I appreciate you trying to help but can we please have some privacy?"

She shook her head. "You won't even know I'm here." She pressed her lips together and pretended to lock it with a key and throw it out.

Edward nodded once and turned towards me. "Bella first of all I just want to congratulate you and your fiancee Shane."

"What?!" I screamed. "I mean what? Shane? Huh?"

He raised his brow. "Uh, you're engagement."

"I knew it!" Casey yelled. "Bella how could you lie to me?! Oh my goodness, where's your ring? Can I see it? It must of cost a fortune!" She lifted my hand.

"I never lied to you Case." I pulled my hand away from her.

"I'm not on the same page as you." Edward said.

"Look, it was just a joke. We're not engaged."

Edward obviously didn't think it was a joke. Judging by the look on his face. "Case, a minute please?" I didn't like the way the two looked at eachother.

"Fine." She rolled her eyes and went outside to join the rest of them.

"All this time..." he whispered, looking down. "All this time I thought..."

I rested my hand on top of his. "All this time I thought the same about you."

"So your-"

"Not engaged? No I'm not." I got up and walked over to the Christmas tree. I looked at the back and found the present I made for him. I picked it up and walked back to the sofa.

"Here." I pushed it towards him.

He hesitated at first but, took it without question. He gently tore the wrapping paper off and opened the box. He pulled out the scrapbook and flipped through the pages taking the time to read them. "I_ never _fell out of love with you Edward." I whispered.

"I know," I could see the corner of his lips rising into a smile. "The second I heard about your new song, Green Eyes, I had a feeling."

"What about you?" I remembered the feeling I had this morning when the sun shone brightly and my walls broke down.

"You mean, did I?"

"Yes." I was afraid of hearing his answer.

"To be honest, there was a point where I thought I did. I was so angry at myself for not calling you or replying back to you. I went off to college and studied some more. I went on with my life but the whole time I was just trying to run away from the feeling that keeps calling back."

"Why were you trying to ignore it?" I couldn't help but ask.

"I wanted you to move on with your life. I didn't want you to live in a dream that caused you pain because of me." I was afraid to meet his eyes. I kept my head down. "But it just made you more miserable...I've seen everything from when you went clubbing, drank, smoke, went to rehab. I didn't know what to do. I just couldn't step in your life again after all I've done to you just because of that issue. What would that make of me?"

"Drinking was my issue. You had no control over it."

"But I was the one who led you to alchol." he fought back.

"Stop it, please." I hated when he put the weight of the world on his shoulders. It's like everything was his fault when it wasn't.

"Bella I'm so sorry. I was trying to fix things but it only made it worse."

"You don't need to apologize." I dried the single tear that fell out of my eye.

"Why not?"

"I'm the one who needs to apologize. If I never left..."

"Bella things happen for a reason."

I moved closer to him and rested my head on his shoulder. He put his arm around me and kissed my forehead. "You have no idea how much I missed this." I said, as we intertwined our hands.

"Believe me, I do." I knew I was home in his arms once again. Did this mean I was his and he was mine?

* * *

"Um, Edward? Can I talk to you in private please?" Alice came into the room with Casey beside her. Casey didn't look to happy. She didn't look mad either. She looked upset but, I didn't want to say anything.

"Sure." He smiled at me before joining the two and heading upstairs.

Casey looked at me one last time before she trailed up behind them. She looked hurt.

* * *

**Can anyone guess what will happen? :)**

**Review, please!**


	6. Damaged

**Thanks for the reviews! :) The pattern's going up! Keep it going guys :D  
To answer all your guesses...**

* * *

**ALICE POV.**

I lead Edward and Casey to my bedroom and shut the door silently. I covered the bottom of my door with clothes so I could make my room soundproof. Bella wouldn't be able to hear us now.

"I can't believe this!" I was upset with them.

"Alice I'm so sorry we should of told you before." Casey burried her face into her hands. My idiot brother put his arm around her.

"I can't believe you would do that to her! And yeah you guys should of told me before I got us into this mess! Poor Bella's downstairs thinking Edward was going to get back with her!" Poor, poor Bella. If I had known, I wouldn't of called Edward.

"Alice will you stop screaming at Casey? It's not her fault."

"I'm not screaming! Bella is Casey's best friend. Casey is Bella's best friend. You, Edward, is Bella's love and so is Casey's. You tell me what is wrong with this picture!" Casey was my best friend too but it was just low of what she did too Bella.

"We thought she was marrying Shane," Casey sobbed. "We didn't mean to hurt her."

"Oh save your apologies." I was known for being the sweet, adorable nice girl. I was but, when it came to the people I loved, Bella in this case, I had to stick up for her.

"Alice stop it please. We didn't mean for this to happen."

"Edward she waited four years! Four years! You don't understand what she went through because you were never there for her. She thought about you every second of the day. Why do you think she went to rehab? Why do you think she smokes? Why she drinks? She's depressed because she really cares about you. How do you think she'd feel when she finds out her best friend is dating the love of her life?" I felt really bad. I hope Bella would handle this well.

"We didn't know." Edward defended.

"Don't give me that crap! Edward you know exactly how Bella feels and you hook up with one of her best friends?"

"We didn't see her for four years! How were we suppose to know?"

"Casey did Edward leave out the part that Bella called him everyday but he never picked up? She emailed him and he never replyed? She wrote 365 letters for him but didn't bother sending it because she thought, if Edward never picked up her calls what makes her think he'd read her letters?"

"No." She whispered.

"Then why did you?" Of all people, Casey was the last I expected to hurt Bella. "And Edward, I thought you loved her? What happened to your promise by giving her oru family diamond? Bella wore it every single day. She would never take it off. She brought the bracelet everywhere with her."

None of them would answer. "You know what never mind but I want you guys to go down there and be honest with her. She's been through enough."

Edward looked up at me and nodded. Then he turned to Casey and kissed her on the head. "Let's go." he whispered.

Casey got up and dried her tears. The two of them walked down the stairs hand in hand with me following behind. When we entered the living room we saw Jasper and Emmett's arms around Bella. She was crying. I ran over to her and sat down infront of her. "Bella, what's wrong?"

She looked up at me, tears rolling down her face faster than before. Her eyes were red from crying. I've never seen them like that... she knew.

* * *

**BellaPOV.**

It was strange that Alice had to talk to the two of them. I didn't want to ask questions. I layed back onto the sofa. Emmett and Jasper came in and sat down beside me. They didn't look too hot either.

"Whatever is bothering you, I'd like to know. I know you guys are hiding something. I want to know now." I demanded.

"Well, we don't like hiding secrets as much as you don't like us keeping them from you." Emmett put his arm around my shoulder. I don't think he was making sense right now. My mind was elsewhere.

"Is it that bad?" I whispered. I knew something was going on. The way Casey looked at me. Was coming here a mistake?

None of them would answer me. "Do I have to repeat myself?" I took out the cig I had in my pocket along with the lighter. I lit my cig up. This was the right time to smoke and I didn't care where I was.

Jasper took the cig out of my mouth. "Hey!"

"Bella do you know what this will do to you?" He held it up in the air.

"Yeah, I do. And I hope it does it sooner because right now I'm not enjoying my life."

Jasper disposed the cig. "Bella promise us you won't do anything crazy?" Emmett said.

"Crazy as in?" I raised my brow.

"You know what we mean."

"I promise." I sighed. "But wait, is it really something I want to hear?"

"Well it's better if you find out sooner than later." Jasper said.

I took a deep breath. Afraid of what I was going to hear. Apparently it was that bad that I had to know now. "Ok shoot."

"Ok, Bella... Edward and Casey are d-"

I held a finger to Emmett's lips. "Stop." I could feel the water filling my eyes. I removed my bracelet and placed it on the coffee table. I wasn't sure I wanted it anymore.

"Bella we're sorry." The both of them rubbed circles on my back.

Just when I thought things would get better, they always fall apart. Apparently luck didn't like me for some reason. I never thought something like this could happen. Yeah, I half expected him to move on but not with one of my best friends. Casey of all people turned around and did this to me. But could I really blame her? I lost Edward in the first place. He was free, single. I didn't own him. I didn't belong to him. But it hurt. I never thought she would do this to me. I don't know if I could speak to the two again.

I wasn't just upset. I was angry. Not just at them but at myself too. I regretted leaving even more now. I knew it was a mistake, my mistake. Edward didn't return my calls because of Casey? Was that the reason? Was he hiding this the whole time? But what about before? When he told me he'd stay as long as I wanted him too? It was nothing but lies. I was more angry at the two then myself at this point.

I continued to cry harder. From all these years of crying, this hurt the most.

I could hear Alice sitting in front of me. "Bella what's wrong?" _What's wrong?_ How could she not know? All of them knew but me.

I looked up at her not bothering to wipe my tears. She was a blurr. "Please don't cry Bella." She hugged me.

How could I not cry? After all that's happened? I trusted everyone with there word that Edward would come back. I had belief in that. I had faith. But it was lost. Long gone now.

I wiped my tears so I could see clearly now. Edward and Casey leaned against the wall holding hands. My heart ached at the sight. I couldn't stay here anymore.

I got up without saying a word. I walked past Casey. "Bella I'm sorry, really I am."

"I don't think you are," I told her. "You of all people did this to me."

"Bella please! I didn't mean to." I didn't care that she was crying.

I turned to Edward. "You're nothing but lies." I whispered and ran upstairs.

* * *

I ran into my room and locked the door. I shut the windows and locked them too leaving the curtains down. I jumped onto the bed and pulled out my phone.

Alice, Emmett and Jasper were banging on my door asking to open it up but I just ignored them. I didn't want to talk to either of them. Especially Casey and Edward. They eventually stopped banging.

I called Rose but for the first time when I really needed her the most, she didn't pick up. She was probably with Renee doing something or left her phone somewhere.

Then I called Jake he didn't pick up either. He was probably in Forks right now so what good would it do if he picked up anyway?

I called a couple of people I trusted, hoping to find an escape out of this horrible Christmas. Everyone was busy and was out of the country.

I went down my contact list and landed on the one person I never thought I'd call for help. I sighed and pressed the call button.

He picked up after four rings. "Hello?"

I squeezed my eyes shut. Hoping he would be my escape. "Hey sorry for calling but are you busy?"

"No, well I'm on the road right now, why?"

He was leaving the state too? "Oh, I was just hoping we could do something." How lame did I sound?

"I'm going to London. I'm spending Christmas there in my family cottage." he said.

"Take me with you?" I pleaded.

"Yeah of course." I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Thanks." I just needed some space. Some time to clear my head.

"Where are you?"

"I'm in O.C at Alice's place."

"I'll pick you up in a few?"

"It's far...are you sure?"

"Yeah it's no problem. I'll give the directions to the driver."

I explained the directions to him as he repeated after me to the driver.

"Thanks Shane. See you soon." I hung up and took out my suitcase. I didn't unpack all of my clothes, which was a lot of help. I wasn't in the mood to do anything. I felt lazy.

I got changed into my favourite pair of black skinny jeans, my white TNA sweater and my favourite red chucks. I slowly straightened my hair to pass time then did my makeup. I pulled out my tote bag and stuffed it with some useful on plane carry ons. Like magazines, my favourite book, my song book and a couple of pens (I always carry it around in case I have an idea for a song. I was thinking of going from pop to soft rock. I'd have to talk about it with the others) and my iPod. Something I also had to carry around with me at all times. I checked the clock. Only half an hour passed since I got off the phone with Shane.

I decided to text Rose and Serena.

_Rose,_

_Lots of things happened since I got here._

_I'm going to London for a few days with Shane._

_It's nothing big... just need to get away to clear my head._

_Don't worry about me. I'll be fine._

_B._

Then Serena.

_Hey S,_

_I know you're in Italy so I can't really call you,_

_How are you? How's Christmas for you so far?_

_Can't wait until you get back, I really need you right now :(_

_Going to London with Shane (No, we're not dating)_

_I'll explain everything later so don't jump to conclusions :)_

_Anyway, see you soon._

_Imy._

_B._

"Bella open up please!" Alice started banging on the door again.

"What do you want Alice?" I yelled.

"Come out please!"

"No!" I put my earphones on and turned up the volume. I took out my pack of cigarettes and lit one up. I hoped Carlisle and Esme wouldn't mind if this room smelled like smoke. I'd get rid of the smell later.

I began writing a note to them. I felt bad that I was leaving again. I told them not to worry about me. I'd be back in a few days. That I needed time and space. I wished them a happy holiday before signing at the end. I was going to drop it in their room later on.

I picked up a couple of magazines I didn't pack and flipped through them. This magazine was all about Jake and I. It had headlines like, "Bella Swan and Jacob Black: Having an Affair?!" It had a couple of pictures of us hanging out, leaving parties, going to clubs and such together. I was tired of all those rumours but thankfully it died down.

The con of that was, ever since that died down, magazines were now filled with pictures of me and Shane. It was another repeat of the rumours they had about me and Jake except this time it was me and Shane.

I inhaled from the cig and let out a big puff of smoke. I knew this was bad but I just couldn't quit. Just like I couldn't quit drinking. They were my escape from all these horrible situations.

I got off the bed and opened up the window. I climbed out and sat on the roof with my earphones still in my ears and the stick in my hand. I looked up at the sky and wondered what Rose and Serena were doing right now. Whatever it was, I bet it was a hundred times better than what I was doing. I wanted to go to Phoneix right now and see Rose and Alexis. But I couldn't deal with Renee right now.

* * *

My mind flew back to the arguement I had with her when I went to Phoneix to visit a few weeks after I got out of rehab. I stood infront of her door, waiting for her to open it.

When she finally did, the first thing she said was, _"What are you doing here?" _

I didn't want to argue with her. _"What? Can't I visit my family?"_

_"As far as I'm concerned, you're not my daughter anymore."_

I was surprised when she said that but hurt at the same time. I know I didn't forgive Renee for just disappearing when Rose and I were younger but she was still my mother no matter what. I came to apolgize to her and this is what I got? _"Mom I don't know why you're saying that but I came here to apologize. I don't want us to argue anymore. That's all we've been doing since you left. If it wasn't that, we never spoke to eachother. The silence is louder than words. It's killing me mom."_

She crossed her arms against her chest. _"Don't you ever call me mom again Isabella."_

I began to tear up. I didn't understand why she was so upset with me. _"What have I done wrong?"_

_"I always knew you would grow up to be like this. Doing drugs, going to parties, you're a disappointment."_

Then I barged in and sat down on the kitchen table. She followed after me but yelled at me asking why I was here and telling me to leave but I wouldn't leave without an explanation. _"What do you mean I'm a disappointment?!" _I screamed.

_"Isabella, you had no control. Obviously because Charlie wasn't around, you took advantage of that. I don't know what you've been doing at the academy's Charlie sent you too but I know that you're nothing but a screw up. Look at you, drinking, smoking, are you not ashamed that you're always on the news?"_

_"I had no control? You weren't there to look after me and Rose! You weren't there to do your job as a mother! You have no right to say that about me. You don't even know who I am! I'm your daughter! You gave birth to me! And now you're saying I'm not part of your family anymore? Yes, I am ashamed but my drinking problems have nothing to do with you."_

_"Don't you dare bring this back to me. This is about you Isabella. You don't have any discipline. Don't think I don't read magazines or the newspaper. I know about everything."_

_"Everything? You know nothing about me! You never cared Renee. You just completely left. You were never around. Charlie was never around. Rose and I had to take care of eachother. Charlie had to hire so many babysitters that they practically lived with us!"_

_"You never answered my calls, you never replyed to my emails! I was worried sick but it was obvious you didn't give a damn about your mother! I cared Isabella. Don't tell me I never cared. You know what, just leave. You have no right to be here."_

_"I shouldn't of came here in the first place." _I got up and took a peek of Alexis who was standing in her crib looking at me. _"If you dare hurt her, if you dare do anything to her, I will come back." _I yelled at Renee.

_"I'd be a better mother to her than I was to you and I certainly will be a better mother to her than you will ever be." _She shot back and that was the last words I heard from her.

* * *

I realized I was done with my cig so I lit up another one. One of my earphones fell out and when I turned my head around, he was standing beside me.

"Bells you gotta quit smoking." He sat down beside me.

"Why do you care so much Emmett?"I inhaled and exhaled slowly. To tell you the truth, I was getting sick of the smell of smoke but I don't know why I couldn't stop.

"Because this," he picked up my last finished cig, "is your ticket to death."

"Oh wow, two smokes in a few weeks. What's that going to do to me?"

He ignored me. "So you're leaving?"

"How'd you get up here?"

He held up a set of keys. "Figures."

"So why are you leaving?"

"Because I want to. It's a free world."

"Where are you going?" What's with all the questions?!

"I'm running away to Vegas with Shane Cruz. I'm going to accept his hand in marriage and I'm going to marry him through one of those bootleg drive thrus. Then I'm going to have his hot babies and we're going to live happily ever after." I swear I was drunk. I don't even know what I was saying right now.

"Bells are you okay? You need to rest." He was about to pick me up.

"No can do sir. I'm leaving in a few minutes. No one or nothing can stop me. 'Sides it's just a little vacay. I'll be back in a few days." I inhaled again before climbing back into the window with Emmett behind me. I grabbed my suitcase, my bag and opened the door. Alice and Jasper were sitting outside of it.

"You're leaving?" She whispered.

"For a few days."

"Where you going?" Jasper asked.

"Vegas." I lied.

"What are you doing in Vegas?"

"Why don't you ask Emmett?" I shot them a smile, stuck my cig betwen my lips. I quickly shoved the note underneath Carlisle and Esme's room then made my way downstairs.

I left my bracelet in the living room so I waked in to go get it. But I knew I should of just climbed down the roof. Casey was still crying and Edward was comforting her. I quickly picked up the bracelet from the coffee table and looked at it, then Edward. I was debating on whether or not I should give it back to him. Or keep it because the diamond had value to the family. And they trusted me with it. I clipped it back onto my wrist. Edward's eyes were tight on me.

"Please don't tell me you're leaving." Casey sobbed.

At that moment the doorbell rang. I didn't answer Casey. I dropped my bags, ran to the door and opened it. "Hey." Shane smiled.

I took the cig out of my mouth. "Hey!" I tiptoed and kissed him on the cheek.

"Ready to go?" He looked around.

"Yeah let me get my bags, you coming in?"

"Sure." He smiled again.

We walked to the living room where everybody gathered. They all looked at me the way I hated to be looked at. I didn't like the attention but apparently I was a magnet to it. "Everyone, Shane. Shane, everyone." I introduced them.

Shane picked up my suitcase. I picked up my tote bag and threw it on my shoulder. "Hello everyone."

"Hey." They all replyed.

"Well," I looked up at Shane. "All set."

He nodded once. "It was nice meeting you all." He put his free arm around my waist.

"Shane I'll meet you in the car." He nodded and let go of me, making his way out of the house.

"You can't leave!" Alice threw her arms around me.

"Relax Ali. I'll be fine. I'll be in London with Shane. Big deal." I shrugged.

"Alice, let her. She's grown up now." Jasper put his arm around Alice.

"Thanks guys. I love you all." I pulled them all into a hug. Emmett had to ruin the moment by going overboard with it. We couldn't breathe.

"Bella I'm really sorry. You don't have to go. I'm sorry." Casey said over and over again.

"I'm sorry too." I gave her a weak smile and looked at Edward once more.

I turned around and headed out the door after waving goodbye to everyone again.

The driver closed the limo door. "Everything ok?" Shane asked.

"Yeah, everything's just fine." I knew it was a lie but I had to do what I had to do. I'd be back in a few days and work everything out. Right now, I just needed to get away from this mess.

* * *

**Ok so, DON'T HATE US!  
We told you the story was going to get sad..  
& not everyone get's their happy endings.  
If there was a happy ending there wouldn't be a sequel! :o!  
Anyway, review please : )  
& Don't worry; they'll be together and we already wrote the  
chap were they are... we just cant reveal which one it is rite now.  
Thanks again :)**


	7. PS I'm Still Not Over You

**Thanks for the reviews guys! :)  
A lot of you are asking if there will be a chapter in Edward's POV?  
Well, we're thinking of writing one. We'll probably let you guys  
pick a chapter or two from this story when it's over to write in Edwards POV.  
Anywhoo, enjoy:**

* * *

"Bella we're here." I could feel Shane poking me.

I opened my eyes and stretched out my arms. "Good sleep?" he asked.

I nodded. "We're here?"

"Yeah, look." He pointed to my window.

The house looked so cozy. It was too big for just two people well, at least it looked big. The outside was wooden. The roof was covered with shimmering snow as well as the ground. It looked so perfect. It was different from what I've been living in but it was nice too have a taste of something else.

Shane opened my door for me. I grabbed my bag and walked out. It was freezing! I knew I should of packed a jacket. He noticed I was shivering. He shrugged his jacket off and placed it around my shoulders. "Thanks."

"No problem." he held my suitcase-which I insisted on holding but he was being difficut- and his. We thanked the driver and opened the gate. We walked down the stone path and Shane opened the door.

The inside looked even cozier. The floors were wooden and the walls were painted a nice shade of gold. In the family room, there were shelves stacked with books, movies and even board games. I sat on the rocking chair near the fire place. Mmm, it was toasty and warm. I'd love to roast marshmellows later on.

"Do you like the place?" Shane sat down on the sofa across from me.

"Like it? I love it!" I grinned like an idiot.

"That's good to hear. Some of my ex's don't like it very much. They're all too bratty and prefer big mansions." he chuckled.

"Oh well I'm glad to be the first."

"Come on," he grabbed my hand. "I'll show you your room."

He lead me up the wooden stairs and into the small hallway. There were four doors. One was the bathroom-which meant we would have to share that- and the rest were bedrooms.

The room I was sleeping in was fairly small. Though I'm not the one too complain. I liked it. It was something different. Just what I needed.

The walls were painted a deep shade of redish pink and the floor was wooden too. Instead of using the gigantic sized closets, I was now using dressers. And the best part was the small twin-sized bed I was going to be sleeping on. I exhaled the cold air around me. I've never been to a cottage so this was my first and I was going to make the best of it.

"Sorry it's not like back home." Shane smiled sheepishly.

I shook my head. "Are you kidding? This is exactly what I need."

His expression was shocked, surprised. "Well I'll let you unpack." He gestured his hand out for me to take another step into the room so he could close the door.

I sighed and sat down on the bed. Had I made another mistake? But right now, that wasn't what I cared about. I was here to have a good time, not to be miserable again. I'd enjoy this while it lasted.

* * *

It's been two days since I arrived here. In those two days, I made time worthwhile. Shane had a frozen pond in the back so, I learned how to figure skate the day I got here. I was now a pro. Okay well, I exaggerated a little bit. Let's put it this way: I no longer fell flat on my butt on the ice. I also learned how to play a bit of hockey. After accidentally hitting Shane's ankle and causing him injuries, I never wanted to play hockey again.

Alice had been calling non-stop. She was able to somehow get the number for the cottage. Rose and Serena texted me quite a bit as well as Emmett and Jasper. I wasn't sure if I was ready to talk to them so I ignored them. Except for Rose and Serena, who were doing fine and having a good time.

I was planning on going back either tomorrow or the next day. Though no one knew. It was sort of a, surprise?

Anyway, on my well spent 'escape', I found out Shane was a musician. He played the piano like me as well as the guitar. He also played the sax which was pretty cool. So, in the end, we wrote a song. I played the piano, he played guitar.

The song was about a boy and a girl. They were best friends since they were young and had feelings for eachother for years now. It talked about how they did couple like things but the two never confessed their feelings. The last verse claims that they're together and how much they regret not telling eachother years ago when they had the chance and all that. It's a pretty cool song and expresses a lot of emotion. It's something a lot of people could relate too. The whole girl and guy best friend relationship thing. I was going to talk to Carly about recording the song.

I was just about done tying up my laces. I got up from the bench and took a step onto the ice. I skated towards Shane. I looked up at the beautiful sky. It was Twilight. Times like this, I wished I spent it with Edward.

"So why'd you leave?" Shane asked after I explained the story to him.

"'Cause I was dumb." I shrugged.

He raised his brow. "Come on there's gotta be a better explanation."

"I didn't want to leave but I couldn't let the girls down either."

"That's not enough."

"What do you mean?"

"Did you love him?"

"Still do." I sighed.

"Then there was no reason to leave." He smiled at me before skating ahead and left me puzzled.

I had already suffered and regretted enough. Shane just had to make it worse. But I couldn't blame him. He was right and yeah I did hate myself for not giving a good excuse but what could I do? It's not like I had a time machine...

We skated for a few more minutes before going back inside. It was getting darker and colder. I sat on the bench inside removing my skates. I hung my jacket and joined Shane in the kitchen for some hot chocolate.

"It's for you." He said, holding the phone out as I walked in.

I groaned. "Who is it?" I mouthed.

He covered the phone with his hand. "Alice." he whispered loudly.

I rolled my eyes. "She's probably begging me to come back." I muttered and took the phone. "Hello?"

"Bel...la!" Alice cried.

"Alice? What's wrong?"

She sobbed on the other end of the line. I kept asking her what was wrong but she wouldn't answer. I waited impatiently.

"It's Rose..." she was able to let out.

My mouth opened in shock. "What happened? Where is she? Is she okay?"

"N-no. S-she's in the h-hospital."

I felt water filing up my eyes. "W-what?"

"I'm at the hospital in P-Phoneix." she whispered.

I immediately hung up the phone. "I have to go."

Shane caught the single tear that reached my cheeks. "What's wrong?"

"It's Rose. I don't know what happened but I gotta get to Phoneix."

"I'll come with you." He looked concerned.

"No, it's fine. I can go."

He shook his head. "Go get your stuff, I'll call a cab."

I nodded and ran straight upstairs. I hoped Rose was okay.

* * *

I waited impatiently for the elevator door to reach the 3rd floor. I tapped my foot onto the ground groaning and muttering unpolite words at the elevator. Even if it couldn't hear or understand me.

As soon as it opened I rushed to the desk. "Hi, I'm looking for Rosalie Swan."

"Room 302. Straight down this hallway, before you turn the corner it's the door on your right side." she smiled.

"Thanks." I walked down the hall eagerly with Shane by my side.

The door was closed. I took a deep breathe and intertwined me and Shane's hand. I gave it a little squeeze, nervously. He caught on and whispered, "It's going to be okay."

I slowly opened the door with my free hand and walked in. Everyone was there. Alice, Emmett, Jasper and Edward. There was no sign of Casey.

And there lying on the hospital bed was my sister, my best friend. She was asleep. She was covered in stitches and bruises. She had bandages wrapped around her hand, I didn't like the sight.

"What happened?" I ran over to Rose's side, still holding Shane's hand. Everyone's eyes were on me.

Alice joined me. She wasn't crying but from the look on her face, you could tell she was suffering. "She got into an accident."

I forced myself to stay strong. "How?"

"A drunk driver hit the car." she whispered.

"Who else was in it?" I was worried Alexis was there too. She was so small, still a baby. No one answered.

I looked up to see everyone's worried faces. Why wasn't anyone speaking up? "Who else was there?!" I asked again.

"Bella," Jasper came to my side. "Phil didn't make it."

A wave of sadness washed over me. Even though I didn't know Phil, he was still a part of our family. "So that means...where's my mom?" I looked down, ready to take the waterworks.

Emmett pushed the curtain behind him. Another hospital bed was revealed. Rennee was lying on the bed looking the same as Rose though hers was worse. Her head was wrapped, her leg was lifted up and wrapped as well. She looked weak. Weaker than Rose. She had these tubes connected from the machine to her. She looked in a indecent condition.

Even if I was suppose to be angry with her, all that was put aside. She was my mom still. After what she said to me. I loved her.

I walked to her side. "Mom." I sobbed and held her hand.

She turned her head slowly to me and caressed my hand with her thumb. "Bella." she smiled slightly.

I layed my head on the edge of her bed, crying my heart out. "Don't cry, Bella." she spoke.

"Mom I'm so sorry."

"There's no reason to apologize sweetie."

I shook my head. "I have every reason too mom. The whole twenty years of my life, I've been ignoring you-"

She cutt me off. "That's not what's important right now. Come here honey."

I sat closer to her as she took my hand in hers. With her other hand, she moved her hand up and down my hair. "I want you to take care of Alexis," she started tearing up. "She's at home with a babysitter. I want you to take good care of her, you understand? I believe you can do an excellent job. I was wrong about you Bella and I shouldn't of said what I said. I love you both very much including Rose. I want you to look out after her. Teach her right and wrong. Teach her the goodness of life. I don't want you to make the same mistake I did." She sobbed. Her eyelids began to close.

I shook my head. "Mom stay with me," I cried. "Stay with me mom!" I shook her hand.

"I love you Bella." Those were her final words.

"Mom!" I cried.

Shane took my hand and pulled me into his arms. I burried my face into his chest while I soaked his shirt with my tears. "She's gone." I whispered over and over again.

"She'll always be in your heart." He rubbed circles on my back.

I could hear Alice calling a doctor in the background. I could hear apologizes being shot at me but I didn't care about that now.

I lost my mom. Someone who I never got the chance to get to know during the twenty years of my life so far. All those years, I remember wishing for my mother to disappear and stop entering my life. I was so angry at her for small reasons. And now, she was gone. She was really gone. Just when I thought life couldn't get any worse...

We were asked to leave the room and wait in the waiting area. I sat down on the chair continuing to sob as everyone put protective arms around me telling me it was going to be okay over and over again.

Edward looked at me, his eyes burning with worry.

"I'm going to the chapel." I stood up.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Shane asked.

I shook my head and walked to the chapel.

* * *

I knelt on the bench and bowed my head. I said a few prayers for my mom, Phil and Rose.

After that I continued to sit there, with my head down. I could hear someone sitting next to me.

I looked up. "What are you doing here?" I asked. I didn't mean for it to be rude.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay." he kept his eyes on mine.

"Clearly, I'm not. I left you for four years, I come back and find out you're dating one of my good friends after you completely told me you'd be there for me. Then I leave, have the time of my life and I come to Phoneix to recieve the news that my step-dad passed away, Rose was injured and now my mom is gone. Does that explain everything?" I shot him a mocking smile.

He didn't answer. I sighed and scooted over closer to him. He pulled me onto his lap and I threw my arms around his neck, resting my head onto his shoulder. I didn't care that I was suppose to be angry with him. I needed him right now. More than anything in the world.

I hugged him tighter, afraid he would let go. "Don't let go." I whispered.

"I never wanted to." He whispered back.

"Then why Edward? Why would you do that?"

"To tell you the truth Bella, I still had feelings for you while I was with Casey. Casey and I didn't have the sparks you and I did. It wasn't right and I didn't know how to tell her. I never stopped thinking about you."

"So what happened?"

"I had a talk with her. I told her how I felt and she accepted it. She too felt that way."

"So you guys went out but didn't really like eachother?"

"You could put it that way."

"Wow."

He nodded in agreement.

"So where does that leave us?" I held his hand.

He lifted our intertwined hands and kissed the top of mine. "We have lots of time to think about that Bella. Right now, what's important is that you get your rest."

"Always the sensitive, caring one."

"Always the stubborn one." He shot back.

I couldn't help but smile.

"Are you going to be okay?"

I sighed. "Yeah, I think I will. At least Renee and Phil are in a good place now, right?" I was still upset but now that I knew Renee and Phil were together in heaven again, I felt a little better. And one day, I would join them. We could be a family again.

"Of course." he nodded.

"I have to get home."

"Don't go." He whispered.

"I have to go get Alexis."

"Alexis?" I forgot he didn't know about her yet.

"My little sister."

He didn't ask questions. We got up and met the other's in the waiting room.

"What's going on with Rose?" I asked.

"The doctor said she was going to be fine. She didn't have a lot of bad injuries and she's responding well." Emmett said. I looked at Emmett and for the first time ever, he was suffering too.

I left Edward and went back into the room. A nurse was taking care of Rose. She was awake.

"Hey Rose."

Rose's face lit up. "Hey, how are you?"

"Good," I sat on the chair next to her. "How're you feeling?"

"Better." She grinned.

"That's good. Emmett's out there worried sick about you."

"I know," she frowned. "I talked to him earlier. I wish he could just go back to the goofy Emmett he is."

"I was surprised too."

"So is it true? About Renee?"

I nodded.

"Oh." she was silent.

We took the moment to comfort eachother in our mother's death. I looked at my phone clock, it was nearly 6 in the morning. "Mom asked me to look after Alexis."

"I know. When I came to Phoneix, we talked about your fight with her. She regretted saying those things and she told me, if anything happened to her and Phil, she'd want you to take care of Alexis." she smiled.

I sighed. "Are you going to be alright?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I'm feeling a lot better now so don't worry about me."

"Good. I'll tell the other's your awake. In the meantime, I have to get Alexis."

"Okay, are you staying though?"

"Yeah until you're able to get your butt out of here."

She laughed. "Then I guess you'd have to make yourself at home cause I'll be here for a while."

I rolled my eyes. "See ya."

I walked back to the waiting room. "Hey, Rose is awake."

Emmett immediately stood up and darted out of the room. Alice and Jas followed. "We'll see you back at your house Bella." Alice said before leaving.

I turned to Shane. "Are you staying?"

He shrugged. "If you want me to."

"You can go back if you want."

He let out a big puff of air. "I'm really sorry about your parents and Rose."

"Thank you," I smiled. Edward gave my hand a squeeze. "Oh I forgot you two haven't offically met. Edward, Shane. Shane, Edward."

Edward let go of my hand to shake Shane's. They stood still and looked at eachother from head to toe. This wasn't weird at all...

I cleared my throat. "So yeah, awkward isn't it?"

The both of them chuckled. "Yeah." They said in unison.

"It's like you guys were seperated at birth." I tried to joke.

"I'll see you around Bella." Shane kissed my cheek and left.

Edward didn't have the smile on his face. "Please don't tell me you're going to hunt him down?"

"I don't like the way he kisses you or holds you." He growled.

"Jealous much, Eddie?"

"Just a tad bit."

I rolled my eyes. "Did I mention he beat you to the cake?" I teased.

"What?!" He hissed. "That's it." He took a step forward but I held him back.

"Relax Edward!" I laughed. "You're adorable when you're jealous."

He shook his head. "Let's just go. You ready?"

I nodded. He reached out for my hand and we intertwined them again, walking down the hallway slowly.

A lot has happened in the past half hour. I lost two people I loved but gained another. It was hard taking this all in. I didn't like to think about it. I was just glad to hear those words from Renee. She really loved me, as her daughter. It was good to know. It would take a while for us to reunite again but, I would wait patiently for that day to come. I could get the chance to spend time with her.

* * *

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	8. Keep Holding On

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* * *

Rose came out of the hospital about a week ago. In that week, the funeral for Renee and Phil had been held. It was difficult for Rose and I to go through the funeral process. With the comfort of our family and friends, it became somewhat easier.

During the after get together, all of Renee's friends and our aunts and uncles shared stories with us about her. Renee was an amazing person. Her life was all about making the world a better place. She would spend all of her free time helping the needy, volunteering around the community and help out the environment. And when she wasn't doing those things, she was spending time with Phil and the family, enjoying every minute of it. If only we were there to experience this with her.

These past few weeks have been unpleasant for the most of us but with everyone by our sides, we never doubted ourselves.

"Ugh!" I shrieked to the cries of Alexis coming from the other room. I ducked under my pillow, suffocating it on top of me.

Edward rubbed my back. "I've got it. Go back to sleep."

I groaned as I sat up. It wasn't fair that Edward took care of Alexis every night while I got more sleep than he did. This was our daily routine. I'd get up early, go to whatever photoshoot, interviews, I needed to cover for the day. I'd take Alexis with me- I made a promise to look after her, and I was commited to keep that promise- we'd come home late, I'd finally get some rest until Alexis would start crying in the middle of the night. I'd be up for another three hours or so just to put her to sleep and then the next thing I know, I'm woken up by my alarm clock an hour later.

"No I got it. You stay put." I stretched my arms out and slipped on my slippers. I walked lazily to the next room that belonged to Alexis.

When I switched on the lights, I found her kicking and screaming in her crib. "Shh, Lexi." I picked her up into my arms, rubbing circles on her back. Her cries soon became louder.

"Lexi please stop," I groaned. "Bella has a busy day tomorrow and you'll wake everyone up."

She never did stop. She kicked me in places that hurt and hit me on the head. I've tried everything to relax her. I sang to her, I rocked her, I pulled out her favourite stuffed animals but nothing worked. She just kept crying and crying.

Angrily, I muttered a few unpolite words under my breath. I walked down the stairs, nearly tripping when Alexis covered my eyes and went into the kitchen for a bottle of milk. I tried to shut her up by sticking her bib in her mouth but she just spat it out and continued screaming.

I sat her down on the kitchen floor as well as myself. I pulled my knees up to my face and screamed. Alexis was so much to deal with. I don't know if I was able to handle her anymore. She cried day after day. I changed her diapers all the time. I fed her, I looked after her. I played with her when I had time. I made sure she was okay. I would freak out when I had to be seperated at her because I'm doing an interview or so and she just wouldn't give me at least two hours of my own time.

"Bella are you okay?" Everyone ran into the kitchen. When I say everyone, I mean everyone. Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rose and Edward. Serena hasn't come back yet due to her father's memorial service being held tomorrow.

"Obviously not!" I threw my hands up in the air and onto my head. "I'm freaking out here Alice!"

Emmett picked up Alexis. "Someone giving Bella a hard time?" he cooed. Alexis went from screaming to laughing. She absoultely adored her living teddy bear.

"Now she shuts up." I muttered.

"Bella you know how many people are in this house? If you need help you could just ask."

"I promised Renee I would take care of her," I sighed. "I have to learn how to do this on my own. Can I talk to Jas for a minute please?" I looked at them with pleading eyes.

"Of course." They all nodded giving us privacy. Except Edward who looked concerned.

"I'll meet you up there." I gave him a reassuring smile. He nodded and walked away with the rest.

"Bells, Alexis is sleeping with us!" Emmett yelled.

I sighed. "Fine!"

Jasper sat down on the floor with me. "Jas what am I going to do?!" I burried my face into my hands. He put his arm around me, comforting me. Jas knew how to make anyone feel better. He has his ways with calming people down.

He blew a puff of air. "I-I don't know Bells." I gasped, shocked that he was speechless for the first time. "This is a tough time for you. I guess, all you could do is just hang on."

"I don't know if I could do this, I can barely take care of myself. What makes you think I could take care of Alexis too? I'm scared I'll screw her up too and that's the last thing I would want." It's the last thing Renee would want too. I want to make Renee proud but how could I with all this stress?

"You'll do fine Bells. Stop with all this talk, you're just adding stress to yourself. You have us to help you and we'll be here no matter what. You just gotta keep holding on and when that rope is about to break, tie it into a knot. Don't let go." That rope had already broke a long time ago when my life fell apart.

"Thanks Jas." I sighed.

"No problem go get some sleep. You'll need it." he helped himself up and ran upstairs to join Alice.

I drank a glass of water and rinsed an apple, taking it with me upstairs. I wasn't as tired anymore.

Edward was still up waiting for me. "Everything alright?"

"I hope so." I took a bite of my apple.

He opened his arms and I crawled right into them. "You'll be fine." He kissed my forehead. I hope he was right. I hope Jas was right. This was just too much for me to handle. And I just couldn't let Renee down.

"I love you." I sighed. What would I do without him?

"I love you too Bella." I crawled out of his arms and layed down beside him, setting my unfinished apple on the side table. The red digits on the clock informed me it was 4:56 in the morning. I had about an hour and a half to sleep. Edward put his arm around me as I snuggled closer to him. As comfortable as I was, I couldn't sleep at all.

Edward began singing me to sleep. I hadn't heard my lullaby in forever. I smiled and eventually drifted to sleep.

* * *

"Bella love, it's time to wake up." Edward shook my shoulders.

"Go away." I groaned.

The sound of his chuckle was pleasing. "I know you're tired but you have to get up. Come on." He removed the blanket I had pulled over me.

I kicked it away from me. "Ugh!" I sat up.

I looked at an amused Edward lying next to me. I bent over to kiss him gently on the lips, afraid I had morning breath. "Have a good sleep?" He asked.

"I wish it was longer." I frowned.

He pulled me ontop of him. "How 'bout I give you something to make you wide awake?" He grinned.

As much as I wanted him to kiss me, I refused. "Morning breath." I pointed to my mouth.

He shook his head and laughed. I didn't find anything so amusing. I got out of his arms and off the bed, running into my closet. "What do I have today?!"

"You just have an interview in New York at noon." he shouted back as I pulled out dress, after dress. Then I decided on wearing my new batman hat along with the belt. No one cared what I wore. All my outfits recieved good reviews in magazines which was surprising because usually I wore random things.

I pulled out my yellow shorts and black tank top. I took a quick shower in the guest bathroom since Edward already beat me to our bathroom. I didn't bother doing anything special to my hair since I'd be wearing a hat over it. I blow dried it making it straight then I slipped on the hat. Then I put the belt on making sure my tank top didn't cover the bat signal. I applied black eyeliner on the top of my eyelid, making it into cat eyes. I looked at myself in the long length mirror. I looked like a bumble bee.

I figured Edward would be changing in our room so I went to Rose's. I knocked on it three times. "Rose you in there?"

"Yeah, come in." she yelled behind the door.

I came in seeing that Rose was changing Alexis' clothes. She finished off with a headband. "Aw look at you, birthday girl. You're getting big aren't you?" she cooed. Why had I forgotten it was my little sister's birthday?

Alexis started laughing. She never did that when I changed her. I was beginning to think she didn't like me. "Nice outfit." Rose complimented.

"Thanks." I looked down at Alexis who crawled over to me.

"Happy birthday Alexis." I smiled.

"You ready?"

"Yeah when are we leaving?"

She looked at her watch. "In a bit. Carly will tell us."

Alexis threw her hands up. Knowing what she wanted, I carefully picked her up. "I still have to get ready. I'll meet you down there." Rose said.

"Alright, I'll take Alexis with me." I walked out and shut the door.

I joined Emmett and Jasper at the breakfast nook. "Good morning."

Emmett reached over and took Alexis from me. "Happy birthday princess!" He threw her in the air then tickled her stomache. She laughed uncontrollably.

"We should do something for her birthday." Jasper suggested.

"Oooh how 'bout we take her to that new princess palace that opened up in Beverly Hills?!" I shook my head at Emmett. Always the goofy, playful nine year old.

"I'll book a reservation." Jasper got up and took out the phonebook.

"I guess that's fine. Jas can you make it for tomorrow? I'm not sure if we'll have time to go there."

Jasper nodded then spoke into the phone.

"Has she ate yet?"

Emmett shook his head. "What should we feed her?"

"I don't know," I shrugged. "What do two year old babies like to eat on their birthday?"

"Pancakes." Emmett grinned widely.

Alexis grew out of baby food. She liked to go for cereal, pancakes or chicken noodle soup. "Pancakes it is." I got up and entered the kitchen.

"Morning Dave, Carl."

"Hello Bella, what will it be for today?"

"Pancakes for the birthday girl."

They nodded. "We'll get right onto it."

"Thanks." I left the kitchen and back to the table where a bronze haired boy now joined.

I sat beside him and kissed his cheek. "Hello." I smiled.

"Hello, beautiful." He flashed his sparkling white teeth you see on tooth paste ads.

"Bella is tomorrow noon okay?" Jasper asked.

"Noon is too early." I groaned.

"That's the only time they have and how many people are coming?"

"Um, all of us, Serena, and I guess all of your baby cousins." I shrugged.

"We're having a party?" Edward asked.

"Yeah guess where it's going to be?" Emmett's eyes grew wild as his smile grew bigger.

"Gee Emmett I don't know."

"Princess Palace!"

I rolled my eyes. "Are you sure you're 21?"

"Hey did you know Emmett still writes his name on his underwear?" Rose came in and sat beside Emmett.

We all broke into laughter. "No freaking way!"

Emmett's cheeks became red. "Shut up! Rose why'd you have to tell them?"

She continued to laugh. "Because I love you Emmett." she kissed his cheek.

"Bella a moment please?" Carly asked. I didn't even know she was here.

"Sure." I followed her into the living room.

"What's up Carls?"

"This is about Alexis." Knowing this would be a long talk, I sat down on the sofa. Why was Alexis the topic?

"What about her?" I gestured my hand informing her to continue speaking.

Long story short. "You cannot bring her around with you. Is there someone you know who can look after her?"

I was upset of the fact that Carly was asking me to leave my little sister. "No I can't do that. I made a promise Carly. You know what's going on you can't just tell me I can't bring her with me."

"I know Bella. I understand but we're going to be traveling a lot. It's going to be difficult for her and for us. Just please, is there anyway someone can look after her while you're away?" As upset as I was, I knew Carly was just doing this for the best.

"I guess." I didn't like the idea. After all, she was family and family always came first but with Carly, it was difficult. She'd probably fire me from the group which was the last thing I wanted.

"Perfect. I'll go see what Rose and Alice are up to."

When she left I pulled out my cell. "Hello, Esme? It's me Bella. Can I ask you for a favour...?"

* * *

I dropped off Alexis at the Cullen's house after feeding her and getting her cleaned up and met the others at the airport. The flight wasn't very long and I finally had the chance to have a short sleep.

The interview wasn't long either. It was just about the movie and our upcoming album release. It was nothing big. They asked us to have a short photoshoot. I was so underdressed.

After that, Alice wanted to go shopping in New York. We spent endless hours at the mall going into countless stores Alice had dragged us in. I was getting tired of her obsession. I swear her closet was growing smaller with the amount of new items she bought every week.

Then we decided on going to a resturant for dinner before catching the next flight. "...and remember the time when Tanya smacked her face onto a locker?!" Emmett held his stomache, hurting from laughing so hard I assumed.

We all joined in with him. "Whatever happened to Tanya?" I asked.

"After you guys left she left everyone alone except for Edward of course. But Edward got so fed up he told her off infront of the whole school and she literally moved away!"

"I wish I'd done that long ago." Edward stared into space.

"Well come on! Let's go do some karaoke!" Alice clapped her hands and bounced into her seat. We all groaned. This day just keeps getting better.

* * *

It felt so free being at a place where everyone didn't treat us like celebrities and joined in our fun. We sang numerous of songs with eachother and with our fans. I was having such a great time. I can't remember the last time I laughed so much.

Emmett got up on stage and took the mic from the host. "Can I get everyone's attention please?" He cleared his throat and tapped the mic twice.

"What's he doing?" Alice's face was puzzled.

I shrugged. "No idea. Do you Rose?"

She shook her head, puzzled too. "Emmett get down from there!" She hissed.

Emmett ignored her. "DJ play that song! I'd like to dedicate this to my loving girlfriend, Rose." Emmett pointed to her. The song 'Forever' by Chris Brown played and Emmett started singing along. Oh. My. Gosh.

Our jaws dropped at Emmett's untalented voice. "Oh my gosh! What is he doing? He's so embaressing!" Alice cried.

"Dude I don't even know him anymore." Jasper laughed.

"I think we should leave now..." Edward joked.

But we couldn't move. Emmett started dancing to the song and he looked so pathetic! He asked Rose to join him on stage but Rose hid behind Jasper. I thought it was hilarious.

Throughout the whole song, we barked rude but hilarious comments at Emmett. We were completely embaressed. The audience around him applauded when the song was over. We were just so greatful the humiliation was done.

"Do you think we can make a run for it?"

"Aw come on guys. Have some fun." I cheered.

"Emmett get off the stage!" Rose hissed. She was still embaressed. And the fact that Emmett said her name in the beginning just made it worse for her.

"Thank you everyone," the audience cheered louder. "I know, I know, I'm amazing," he laughed at his own joke and bowed. "Now, I'd like to say a few words."

We all shot eachother nervous glances. Afraid of what Emmett will do next. "Rose, from the moment you stepped into that resturant four years ago, I knew you'd be the one," he started. Rose turned pink as everyone looked at her. "And now look where we are. We're still together after all these years," he wasn't an expert at these types of speeches but I have to give him credit for being up there. "But anyway, I can see that you're more embaressed than I am being up on this stage. And man this took me a lot of balls to do," he chuckled. "I wish I could of thought of a speech earlier but what I'm trying to say or well ask is... Rosalie Lillian Swan, will you marry me?"

Alice and I jumped up, squealing as "aw's" echoed in the background. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh Rose!" we chanted.

"Yes." Rose shed a tear and ran to Emmett on stage. She leaped onto him and kissed him roughly. My sister got her fairytale ending. I was so happy for the two of them. Alice and I hugged eachother as we cried joyful tears.

We congratulated both of them and stayed a little bit longer. Then we finally called it a night and boarded a plane. I layed my head onto Edward's shoulder and wondered when I would get my happy ending. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Edward but did he feel the same way?

* * *

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	9. Walk Away

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* * *

_I was running, running so hard my lungs were about to burst but somehow, I couldn't make my body move fast enough to make it on time. I grabbed the bottom of my wedding gown, holding it up so that it made my legs easier to move but, they just wouldn't cooperate. As if they were trying to stop me. I was going to be late for the moment of my life._

_Finally, I reached the stone stairs and began jogging up to the doors. Nearly making it, I tripped over thin air, falling to the ground hard. Frusterated, I kicked off the death traps Alice had forced me into. Just when I was about to give up and cry my heart out, I thought about the handsome bronze haired man waiting for me at the altar. I swept myself up on my feet again continuing to jog up what seems like endless stairs._

_I opened the doors to find that someone else had taken my place up at the altar. Someone who wasn't me. _

_She stood at 5'4 with the same white dress I had on. Her hair was styled the same as mine, curled and fell freely down her shoulders. Her hands intertwined with the man standing infront of her. The man I truely loved._

_"...I do." She spoke the two simple but powerful words. _

_Shaking my head angirly, I walked up to the couple. "No! No!" I sobbed. Was this really happening? The guest shouted unpleasant words at me but I didn't care. That wasn't what I was here for. This is-or in this case, was- my wedding. _

_The girl turned her head around and looked at me with a grin on her face, her peircing eyes glaring back at me. _

_My mouth dropped open. No it couldn't be. I didn't know what was worse. Living in a world without Edward or seeing a friend take you place at your own wedding. Either one would leave me in pieces. Not that I wasn't already broken. "Casey?" I took another step closer seeing Edward put a protective arm around her waist. What's it going to take for this misery to end?_

* * *

"Gah!" I woke up, panting as my alarm clock rang. _Just another nightmare, _I chanted to myself over and over again. These were just one of the millions of dreams I had each night. And everytime, I worried even more. I was scared-no scared didn't even cover it- that one day, it would actually happen. When Edward chose someone else over me, again. Specifically Casey.

"Bella are you okay?" A soft voice came from beside me, a voice I hadn't heard in weeks.

"Serena?" I threw my arms around her. "Ah! Why didn't you call? I would of picked you up! When did you come?"

She gasped for air as my tightened grip around her shoulders became lighter. She flipped her wavy dirty blonde hair now completed with black colouring at the bottom. She must of dyed it during her vacation in Italy. "Sorry I thought I'd surprise you guys." She giggled. Like I hadn't had enough surprises, I thought. "I just came. I heard you screaming and mumbling in your sleep while I walked up the stairs."

Of course everyone was concerned about my sleep talk. It was a very bad habit of mine. I usually let our secrets that were for my ears only and all sorts of embaressing things. If only there were a cure to stop it. Though Edward says it was adorable and he'd watch me sleep sometimes claiming that he missed the sound of my voice. I don't know what he liked better; when I was consious or unconsious.

I stretched my arms out not noticing I was sore until I moved just an inch. I rubbed the back of my shoulder intensly. "You must be tired."

"Actually, I got a lot of sleep on the plane." her eyes were thoughtful and the big smile on her face gave it away.

"Alright," I sat myself up, preparing for her long rants. "What's his name?" I poked her teasingly.

She placed both hands on her heart and looked up at the ceiling. "His name is Raymond." she sighed and battered her eyelashes as if he stood before her, admiring him.

I slapped her playfully on the back of the head. "Ow! What was that for?!" she scowled in response.

"For being a boy crazed idiot!" I laughed remembering the text messages she sent me. Each being about a different boy each time.

She knew what I was referring too. "But Bella! I think he's the one!" her tone was desperately trying to convince me.

I raised my brow at her. "Mhm. That's what you said last week about that boy, Paolo, was it? Or wait, wasn't it Chris? Or what about the redhead Chase?" I looked at her teasingly. She didn't find it funny at all. "I'm sorry." I smiled, battering my eyelashes at her.

"I know, it's okay but really Bella, I really, really like him!" she laid back onto the bed and hugged my pillow against her chest.

"And...?"

"He said we couldn't date because it'd be a long distance relationship." she frowned. I gave her a comforting hug. I hadn't seen her this upset since the day Shawn broke up with her. She spent days comforting herself with a new tub of Ben&Jerry's while watching sad romantic movies.

"But anyway enough of me, how's your life going?" she asked after a moment of silence. She was never this interested about my personal life. I assumed Alice fed her some news and she just wanted to confirm it with me.

"Hold that thought. Where is everyone?"

"Out?" she shrugged. "Bella stop trying to change the subject!" she shook my shoulders waiting for me to talk.

"We have lots of time to talk about it S." I looked at her with pleading eyes. I knew she couldn't argue with that. Giving in, she let out a deep sigh.

"Alice left you a note." I took the little post it from her hand.

"Bella- taking Alexis out. Everyone decided to come and well we thought we'd let you sleep. P.S- do you mind going to the party center and pick up a few lootbags?" I read out loud. Ugh more shopping to do! Like we haven't had enough? Alexis' party had been moved to this coming weekend since it was a late reservation and too short notice. What better things did I have to cover on a Tuesday afternoon? "S, you're coming with me."

"Fine hurry and get dressed. I'll be downstairs." she ran out of my room, giving me my privacy.

* * *

"I've never gone shopping for lootbags. What do you put in them anyway?" I picked up an odd looking toy from the shelf as Serena pushed the cart around.

"Oh, I use to do this all the time. Do you know how many kids are coming?"

I pulled out my cellphone, remembering I had jotted down notes from when Alice gathered a meeting. "Um, 8 girls and 6 boys."

"Ages?" she looked so concentrated as she raided the shelves picking up toy by toy and throwing them back in the bins after giving them a disgusted look. I thought it was rather hilarious picking out the perfect items for little kids who would be fascinated by just anything. I could drop a few rocks in there for all they care.

"2 girl's are around Alexis' age- which is 2, and one boy is 3 the rest are 4-8." "Hmm..." I followed behind her to the next aisle as she picked up random things and threw them into the cart. I didn't know what I would do without her. I'd probably still be at home debating on whether or not to go or I'd probably hire someone to do the shopping for me. Boy was I glad I didn't have kids yet.

Sure I wanted kids but I wasn't experienced. I didn't even know how to take care of my little sister, let alone myself. I was terrified I'd make a mistake and Alexis turned out like me- a screw up.

Social services was threatening to take Alexis from me if I became irresponsible since I stuggled with my drinking issues. But I fought hard to bring Alexis home with me in L.A. I convinced them I would change for the better and take care of her like my life depended on it. Who cares about me, every part of me focused on Alexis.

"Bella? Bella... earth to Bella..." Serena sang. I quickly snapped out of my thoughts, seeing a blurred motion swinging back and forth infront of me. When Serena noticed I came back to earth, she dropped her hand and giggled. "Come on, we're done."

"That was fast." I wondered how long I stood there for.

"What can I say? I'm a pro." she flattered herself. I rolled my eyes and opened the door for her, carrying half the number of bags.

"I'm so hungry," I complained, rubbing my stomache with my free hand. "Can we go grab lunch?"

She stared in disbelief as her finger rised pointing at our car. Confused, I turned my attention forward to see what she was staring at. "Tanya." she spoke dryly.

* * *

"Well, well, well. Look what we have here." Tanya smirked. She was still the same old witch back at the academy. I thought I had escaped her years ago. Casey stood next to her and let me tell you, she didn't look too happy.

I gave my half of the bags to Serena and told her to put it in the trunk so I could deal with Tanya. "Well this day just keeps on coming doesn't it?" I smiled sarcasticly.

"Still the same stubborn Bella I see." she glared. Casey stood silent as she folded her arms against her chest leaning against my car door. Serena stiffened against the trunk. I gave her a look reassuring her that I was okay.

"What can I do for you today Tanya? You still up for the black eye I promised years ago? Is that what you came back for?" We looked at eachother intensly, exchanging death glares.

"No Swan. I'm here for Casey. How could you hurt poor Casey? She finally got what she wanted but you had to come back and screw it up for her." she shot at me.

"Excuse me?" I spat.

"Go on Casey. Give her a piece of your mind." Tanya gave Casey an encouraging push towards me.

"What's going on Casey?" I hissed.

"So I hear you and Edward are back together." she gave me a murderous look. I swear if we were in a dark alley and no one was looking, she'd hurt me just like that. I didn't respond. I waited for her to get on with her point. "You know, I didn't think you'd hook up that fast after all that's happened."

"Well just to let you know, it wasn't easy just entering his life again." It was true but non of us spoke the truth. Our whole relationship so far has just been nothing but silence.

"Well it doesn't seem like that. You just waited for me to leave so you could get your hands on Edward didn't you? I knew you were emotional but I didn't know you craved that much attention that you had to leave with Edward's twin." So now I was an attention wanter? Why was drama always attracting me and pulling me into this mess?

"I didn't wait for you to leave," I scowled. "You don't know what it was like to be put in my position! You don't know what I went through. Who are you to tell me what I am? What I did?" All this time I thought Casey had a good side. Turns out she was just as cold as Tanya.

"Oh and I'm so glad I put you through that." Tanya laughed wickedly behind Casey.

"W-What are you saying?" I asked, confused. Tanya put me through this? I didn't understand.

"I knew about the record deal," she began. I stood there feeling the blood rushing to my cheeks as my skin burned. Not because I was blushing but, because I was mad. Furious. "Casey here put on a good show by pretending to be the sweet, loving friend you all thought she was. I made sure you guys won because I knew you'd have to leave the academy. Especially your beloved Edward," she grinned amusingly. "And my plan worked," she put her hand on my shoulder giving me an assuring look. I shrugged it off, speechless. "and now the whole world knows how much of a screw up you are." she said the last words harshly.

"Tanya what the hell!" Serena ran to my side. "Stop it! You've caused enough drama."

"Please," Tanya laughed. "What are you? Her sidekick?"

It took me some time to register all of this into my head. Tanya set me up. She set all of us up. I knew Tanya was low but I didn't know she was that low to plan this up. Especially Casey. All this time I thought she was different. When really, she was nothing but a lie.

"Aw," Tanya cooed. "Did I hurt poor little Bella?" she placed both her hands on my shoulders.

"Don't. Touch. Me." I growled.

"Oh yeah, what are you going to do about it?" she gave me the most annoying, supposedly threatening look you could ever recieve.

Without responding I launched myself at her. I threw a few punches when I could. Still using her weak techniques, she pulled my hair and rolled on top of me. She slapped my face, digging her nails into my skin. "You ungrateful bitch!" she screamed.

"Stop it!" Serena climbed ontop of Tanya which added more weight onto me. Serena gripped her hands on Tanya's shoulders and dragged her off of me.

"Let go of me you whore!" Tanya shouted as she kicked Serena in the shin with the back of her heel.

Serena immediately let go before I had the chance to get up and fix myself. Tanya and Casey both jumped on top of me. Casey held my hands down, preventing me from hitting Tanya back. Tanya took advantage of that by slapping me a few times. I could feel her long, hard nails digging into my skin as it burned every second. "You. Don't. Deserve. Him!" they repeated over and over again.

With much force I screamed and rolled over to the side, shrugging their hands off of me. "Don't take another step." I warned them as I caught my breath.

The sounds of sirens becoming louder in the distance caught me off guard. "Look what you've done Swan." Tanya scowled. Both her and Casey grabbed their bag and backed away from my car as the police vehicle pulled up beside us.

"Are you okay?" Serena ran over to me. She lifted her hand to stroke against the cuts I recieved from Tanya's killer nails. I flinched. "Does it hurt?" I nodded.

"Is there a problem here ladies?" a young officer stepped out of his car pulling his pants up. Something I've seen often.

Like the devil she was, she put on an angelic face. "No sir, there's nothing going on here." She battered her eyelashes as she spoke in an innocent tone.

"The hell there's nothing going on here!" I spat. "Officer have you seen the marks she left on me?" I tilted my head up and pointed to my cheeks, then my arms which were now flooded with blood.

Casey gasped. "As I recall, you fought back too!"

"Only because you two attacked her!" Serena shouted.

Tanya and I exchanged glares again as I rubbed off the blood with the bottom of my shirt. "Bella, would you like to press charges?" he asked. I was surprised he didn't have to ask for my name.

The corners of my mouth lifted up into a smile. "Yeah actually, I'd like to."

"What?!" Tanya and Casey shrieked in unsion.

"That's not fair! She can't do that!" Tanya stomped her foot on the ground.

"Actually she can. She's got the marks. Last time I checked you're unscarthed." he made a smart recall. Props to the officer. He reminded me of Principle Franklin from the academy.

She lifted her arms, desperate to find a scratch. "But! But! Ugh!"

The both of them hung their heads in defeat. Chief Garthson, the name on his tag, took out his handcuffs and cuffed the both of them. "Stupid whore." Tanya mumbled under her breath, giving me her last glare before stepping into the car.

"Could you two follow me to the station?"

"Sure." we smiled pleasantly. Tanya was going to get it good. Just what she deserved.

* * *

"What was that all about?" Serena asked the question I didn't want to answer. We had just gotten out of the station after signing a few papers and what not. We walked back to my car, tossing the keys in my hand.

I bit my lip nervously. It wasn't a subject I liked to re-visit. "Er, something between me and Casey."

"Oh by the way, you might want to clean the blood up before we get back." she reminded me. I had competely forgotten about that.

I unlocked the doors with a click of the button. When I got into the driver's seat a very impatient Serena looked at me. "Well...?"

"Alice didn't tell you, did she?"

"She saved that part for you." she grinned. Obviously she didn't know how much this tortured me.

I strapped myself in and started the car, making my way onto the road. "Long story short. Casey and Edward dated."

"Oh." the smile wiped off her face.

"Yeah..." I played around with the radio as the silence grew louder.

"When did this happen?" she finally asked.

"I don't know but, when I went to Alice's house, I found out then I went to London and I came back," I skipped the part about Renee and Phil assuming she already knew. "And Edward tells me they broke up and well yeah that's basically it."

"So how are you two handling it?"

Oh crap. "Well we never really talked about it."

"You're kidding right?" she asked in a mocking tone.

I shook my head. "Bella you just can't let Edward in after what he did to you! Did you guys hook up like right away? You guys never sat down and talked?"

I groaned. "No Serena we didn't. I'm scared that if we talk, one of us will get upset with the other and then we'd fight and go seperate ways again! I'm so tired of that! I'm tired of always getting hurt." I felt the waterworks coming. I fought the urge to park on the side of the road and bang my head on the wheel multiple times as the water streamed down my face.

She kicked the seat back and relaxed. "You two have got a lot of talking to do." she mumbled.

"It's not as easy as it looks." I admitted.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm saying, I'm scared to talk to him." I tried staying calm.

"Why?" All she did was ask, ask, ask. When would be the day she finally ran out of questions and just became speechless?!

"Like I said, I don't want to mess up the relationship. To tell you the truth, it wasn't easy seeing him again. Yeah, I missed him all these years but things are just so different. We're not young anymore. We have bigger responsibilities. And when I found out about him and Casey, I didn't know if I could see him again but, I tried blocking out those thoughts as much as I could. I'm afraid he'll leave me for someone else." My last sentence came out in a whisper.

"It's all Tanya's fault," she stated. "If it weren't for her, things wouldn't turn out the way it were. You wouldn't have gone through all this misery you didn't deserve." she put a comforting arm around me. Half of what she said was true but the other half was all my fault. I chose to lead my life the way I did. I've made mistakes that I can't erase and they will always come back to me.

"Bella I want you to talk to him tonight." her tone was serious. I've never seen her so demanding before. I stared at the road infront of me, the beautiful bright sky ahead. If only life was easier, if only we didn't have a price to pay. Things wouldn't be so complicated.

"I'll try." It wasn't a promise. But talking to Edward shouldn't be hard right? We spoke before... but, what if he didn't want to talk about it? What if I say one thing that makes him angry with me and he leaves? I never really had control of my anger once it hit me.

This roller coaster ride was endless. It started off straight and smooth. It eventually went up and back down, continuing it's pattern. When was I ever going to be able to get off?

"Good. Now stop worrying too much," she read the expression on my face. "It's just a talk. Not like you're asking him to marry you or something."

I stopped dead on the track. Serena caught the steering wheel before I got ourselves into an accident. "Bella watch it!" she panicked.

"S-sorry! Oh my gosh. Sorry!" I focused back onto the road again.

"Did I say something wrong?"

"No," I shook my head. "No you didn't."

She pretended nothing just happened. "So anyway, excited about Rose and Emmett's wedding?" she bounced.

"Yeah, sure." I tried to block out any word that related to that particular commitment.

"You don't sound so sure." she was beginning to feel suspicious by the sound of her tone.

"I am. I just... it's been a rough afternoon." that wasn't a lie.

Thankfully she dropped it. Though I had a feeling she'd eventually come back to my strange attitude later on. "Okay... gosh you've changed."

"I have?" I raised my brow but she couldn't see.

"Yeah, you use to be so fun and outgoing, then you went to all depressed and emo and now you're... well you've gone back to your oldself... with the whole not giving a damn attitude but I don't know," she shrugged. "It's weird. I don't know I guess I've just been away from you too long."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Hey, I could be fun and outgoing again."

"Really?" she stretched the word out giving me a challenging look.

"Yeah, you'll see." I smirked.

"Can't wait." she slouched onto the seat folding her arms across her chest and kicking her legs up.

I honestly hope I could go back to the way things were. When we were sixteen, back at the academy. I sighed at the memories. Oh how I missed those fun, dramatic days. I would trade anything in the world just to be a teenager again. I regretted almost everything in life not realizing what I've got until it disappeared. Life was too short for all the drama I had gotten myself in. Life was too short to do things I would regret. I wish I was five years old again.

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**So, we hope this chapter came out as good as we thought.  
If you didn't know... we started a new story called "A Whole New World".  
If you want, you could check it out :) Thanks.**


	10. I'll Be Lovin' U Long Time

**Sorry about the long update guys!  
We hope this chapter turned out successful after re-writing it many times.  
We appreciate your reviews & patience (:  
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These past three weeks have been super hectic for all of us. Emmett and Rosalie's wedding was in just two days. Alexis eased up a little to my luck and my career was slowly going down the drain, as Carly says. But I believe my career is doing just fine.

When I was at an interview or whatever, Edward would stay back and take care of Alexis. We didn't go anywhere nowadays like we use to. Ever since that day we had a real conversation, it was awkward for me now. And I was scared of loosing what we had to begin with. He promised me everything will be alright and I hoped he was right.

_"Bella haven't we done enough talking?" he was on the edge of my bed far away from me as possible; at least it seemed like it. I sat cross legged behind him. Neither of us bothered to look at eachother._

_"No, Edward. We haven't and I don't want to pretend like nothing's happened in the past four years." He didn't move an inch. He seemed bothered by something. But I knew he felt it too. _

_"Then why didn't you speak up long ago?" his tone hurt me, like everything was my fault. I was surprised in his sudden mood swing._

_"Because I was afraid!" _

_"Afraid of what exactly?" he sounded annoyed. I half expected him to be like this, not wanting to talk but for the sake of our relationship all the talking in the world was needed._

_He waited impatiently for a respond but ended up ignoring me. "You said you wanted to talk and here I am. Now you're not saying anything. Do you think everyone has all the time in the world for you?" his tone and choice of words hurt me. Like a thousand bricks hit me in the stomach. I couldn't believe what he was saying._

_"No, I don't think everyone has all the time in the world for me Edward. I'm just saying, we haven't straightened this out yet and I'm tired of pretending like nothing happened. I want to know the truth Edward. I thought relationships was about trusting one another? And being honest." _

_He sighed; clearly stating how annoyed and tired he was. But he didn't say one word. "So you plan on continuing our relationship like this?" _

_No answer again. _

_"Are you just going to sit there and say nothing? Do you know how frusterating this is Edward? I don't want to talk about this more than you do."_

_"So then why do you care?" he was as outraged as I was. Of all fights with Edward, this has got to be the worst. I stared at the back of his head in disbelief. His head was tilted down and he played with his fingers. I could see him lifting his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose; something he did when he wasn't in a good mood._

_"Because saying I love you just doesn't fix it. We kissed and made up. We didn't straighten it out and I want to know why you decide on going after Casey when you clearly stated you never stopped thinking of me." I looked down at the red comforter as tears blurred my vision._

_"Bella I told you, I never meant to hurt you and I didn't have the same feelings for her that I have for you." That didn't explain things well. He kept repeating it over and over again. I understood that part but if he didn't have feelings for her in the first place then why'd he date her?_

_"Then why?" my voice became a whisper. I didn't have the strength to hide the hurt burried inside of me._

_"She confessed her feelings about a month after you left and when Tanya disappeared," he was finally admitting it to me. I softened my sobs so I could hear his hurt voice. "At first I told her I couldn't turn my back on you, I loved you and I still do, I couldn't date her when I still had strong feelings for you. That just wasn't right but, she convinced me. She told me to try it out because I could never know what I really felt if I don't put my heart out there. I thought about what she said. Was I really in love with you the way I thought I was or was it all the hurt build up inside of me that pulled me away from everything? So stupidly, I told her we could try but honestly Bella there was nothing between us. No sparks. I hope you understand that. You always had my heart Bella." My tears streamed faster down my face. Everytime I thought Edward did something wrong, he was never the one to blame. All this time I thought he lied about loving me. Love was a strong word, a committment. And how did I know he meant it? That he really knew what love was? _

_"That's all I needed to hear. It just bugged me you know? I left and then you came and we just moved on and I'm so sorry." How could I be so stupid? Obviously he was with me for a reason but I just pushed it. I looked at him again afraid I had done something wrong and this time he was looking back at me too. There was no sign of hurt on his face, just concern. He sat in front of me and pulled me into his arms. _

_"I'm sorry too, love. I shouldn't of yelled at you like that. I understand how you feel and I've been meaning to bring this up sometime I was afraid too. But it's over now right? The past is being left behind so we have nothing to worry about. All that matters is that I have you and you have me. I love you." he tilted my head up and pressed his lips against mine. _

* * *

"Are you scared?" I leaned against the balcony beside Emmett who stared blankly at the ground. It was pitch dark outside and only one light was on. The stars were just amazing and the cool California breeze brushed against my skin.

"Yes and no." He puffed a large amount of air. You could see the movement in the air. "No because I'm going to be marrying the most amazing person in my life and yes because I don't know. It's just the nerves but man, marriage can you believe it?" The thought of seeing Rosalie walking down the aisle in her gorgeous white dress; Emmett standing there with the most satisfying expression on his face was so imaginable and sweet. What I'd do to be in their position.

"You'll do fine," I gave him a pat on the back for reassurance. "Just don't forget to breathe."

He laughed out loud. "Seeing Rose, I know I'd forget. Thanks Bells." he pulled me into a tight bear hug before going back inside.

I turned around facing the land in front of me rather than the door leading to the balcony. I looked up at the full moon and the stars used as the light. I was nervous for Em and Rose. I was probably the most nervous one out of all of us. Which was funny because wasn't it suppose to be Em and Rose? I was Rose's maid of honour since I was her sister and it was only fair. Though of course Alice threw a fit because she wanted to be maid of honour and was angry that they chose to have a casual wedding rather than a big formal one. Typical Alice once again.

I felt cold arms wrap around my waist. I tilted my head up to meet his warm green eyes. "Cold, love?" I saw goosebumps on my skin.

I nodded and he held me tighter against his chest. "How was work?" I kissed his jaw. Boy did I miss him. I hadn't seen him all day. He was a bartender at Emmett's bar, something I learned just recently since it was the holiday's and I hadn't payed attention to little details. Apparently Emmett opened one just a year ago in Beverly Hills and Edward and Jasper were the first to work there, obviously. When he wasn't working his night shifts, he was taking care of Alexis when he wasn't asleep. I wasn't usually home either. With the tour coming up, interviews and photoshoots became heavy.

"The same as usual. You should come by sometime."

"When I'm not busy that is."

He sighed beside me clearly thinking of the same thing. His chin rested on top of my head. "Do you ever feel as if you'd like to get out of the music and acting industry and go back to your normal life?" he questioned.

It was a good question. I've never really thought of that. "Honestly, somewhere between yes and no. I love my job but you know at times it gets frusterating like when I have to travel from state to state or city to city and I hardly have time to manage my own responabilities like Alexis. But sometimes I just don't know if I really want to call it quits. And lately, I've been thinking about dropping out of the group I mean, like I said I love my job but, I don't have time for myself or anyone else anymore. It's always been about interviews, photoshoots, shooting music videos or auditioning for new films Carly's been throwing at me. I never really got the chance to actually sit and talk about this that day we found out we'd be in the industry. It was just rushed you know. And I was sixeen then, of course I wanted this but when you actually get a taste it's not as easy as it looks or sounds."

It was quiet for a moment and I wondered if my rattling annoyed him. I turned around now facing his beautiful, smooth pale face seeing his green eyes lit. I traced circles on his shoulders waiting for him to say something. I coudn't read his expression. "Do you ever," he hesitated to go on but I waited. "Do you ever think what our lives would be like if you hadn't signed your contract or wasn't given the deal in the first place?"

"Well it would have more drama, that's for sure." I tried to joke but his tense, serious expression didn't change. "No," I sighed answering it again as if I hadn't said anything. "I've never really thought of that. What about you?"

He nodded once. "All of this regret wouldn't of happened. I could of taken you to prom, we would of graduated together. We could of spent the rest of our teenage years with eachother." he said it like he was angry at something. I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I thought about what he said about going to prom and graduating with him. I really would of loved that. And I missed my chance at prom. I would of traded fame just being there on the dancefloor with him. I would trade the world just for him.

"Well," I pulled out of his embrace and intertwined my hand with his. "Why don't you tell me all about prom and I'm sure I'd enjoy hearing it from you." We walked back to our room and sat facing eachother on the bed. I had already put Alexis to sleep earlier and it would be soon that I'd have to rock her to sleep again.

"Easy," he said. "Prom wasn't the same without you." I could see the hurt in his eyes. Like I was the one to blame.

"Oh come on, you must of liked one part."

He shook his head. "I didn't enjoy one bit."

"Oh," my voice was dull. "What did you do the whole time?"

"I spent every second glancing at the door wishing you'd appear." I immediately felt so guilty. Why was I such a horrible person?

I sighed and gave his hand a little squeeze. He stared intently at the blanket under him. "I'm sorry I brought it up."

"It's not your fault, you were curious." he said sympathetically. I always hated how he made me feel less guilty with just the sound of his voice or a look in my eyes. It wasn't fair how much power he had on me.

"Are you tired?" he asked after a couple of minutes.

I was but this was one of the first night's I got to spend with just Edward and I. "No." I lied.

"What would you like to do then?"

I pressed my lips together thinking of a good way to spend a Saturday night. Alice and Jasper had gone to Texas for the weekend to visit Jasper's parents. Emmett and Rose were obviously out God know's where so the house was all ours tonight. This happened rarely.

"We could watch a movie..." But I had an even better idea.

He caught the hint in my tone. "Or..."

I threw him a seductive smile before pushing him back onto the bed. I crawled on top of him pulling my face about an inch away from him. My hair acted as a curtain around his face. I pulled back a peice of my hair that blocked his eyes. He did the same but tucked in the other side. "We could try this." I bent my head forwards so are lips moved in sync.

We eventually pulled away to catch our breaths. His cool breath tickled against my skin as he whispered 'I love you' in my ear. I shifted backwards so that I was kneeling on the bed. I could tell his mind was elsewhere as if he was trying to read my mind. I began unbuttoning the first three buttons of my shirt when he pulled my hand. "Bella, what are you doing?" I rolled my eyes silently, wasn't it obvious?

It felt as if a ton of bricks had hit me right in the stomach. I looked as his face clearly disapproved. "I'm sorry." Why was I apologizing?

"For what?" he was thinking the same too.

"I- I didn't mean to, you know..." my hands were shaky as he studied my face. "But... you don't want to?"

He shook his head and I tried not to make it obvious I was hurt. "Well, I do. But, not tonight Bella."

"Why not?" I hadn't realize my tone became selfish until he raised a brow at me.

"Bella, be reasonable. I want it to be perfect." Anytime was perfect as long as I had Edward with me. Why was he so against it? I sat back down on my bum and crossed my legs along with my arms.

"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" he sat at my side and pulled me onto his lap.

I didn't respond. He place a finger under my chin and pulled my face up to look at him. My eyes moved another direction though. "Bella please don't be like that."

My stomach felt so uneasy and I was blushing like mad. God this was so embaressing! I finally looked at him to see the comfort in his deep green eyes. The smile he knew I loved appeared on his face but deep down I could tell I was unwanted.

"I really am sorry Bella. I do want you," his smile was reassuring. "but I want our first time to be perfect. Something memorable." he caressed his thumb on my burning red cheek.

"Always have to be the caring, sensitive one." I muttered.

"And you're always the stubborn one who I'll always love. I promise you Bella, we will do it." He kissed my forehead and cradled me in his arms.

We stayed like that in what seems forever. I would never get tired of this though. Just siting on his lap, his hands wrapped around my waist will never get old. We relucantly broke apart at the sound of Alexis' screams and sobs. I sighed and got up from the bed. "I'll take care of it."

"Would you like to watch a movie?" he asked before I left.

"Sure I'll meet you downstairs."

* * *

It didn't take long to put Alexis to sleep. I rocked her gently in my arms and even hummed my lullaby to her. Though it didn't sound as great like when Edward sings it. She eventually fell asleep and I layed her in her crib.

Edward let me pick a movie of my likings. I obviously picked 'The Notebook' one of my favourite romances. While I got the movie set up, he popped some popcorn and grabbed us some drinks. We layed on the sofa, him in the back and I in the front. He pulled the thin gray blanket over us and wrapped his arms around me.

It wasn't even half way through the movie and I was already sound asleep. I felt the familiar strong arms lock underneath my knees and carried my up the stairs. The last thing I heard was, "goodnight my love" and a soft, gentle touch made contact with my forehead.

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**So, we feel that this story is WAY TOO DEPRESSING! Lol we're so sorry about that.  
We're going to be focusing on more Edward&Bella (obviously) 'cause we feel that all they do is argue & talk about how they feel. There isn't enough quality time!  
Hopefully this chapter is a good start. Anyway, review please D  
P.S- omg the twilight trailer! Now we absolutely CANNOT wait until the movie even more!**


	11. I'm Only Me When I'm With You

**Longest chapter so far! Over 5,000 words! Hopefully this will be enough for the week :) We tried to make it long as possible.  
We're so flattered you guys love this story. Honestly when BC:H&G came out (by the way we changed the name of BHA to Bella California: Hello&Goodbye. We thought Beverly Hills Acadamy was too simple. & This story title might change too), we thought no one would read it but wow were we wrong! We just wanna say thanks a bunch :D Enjoyy...**

* * *

"Goodbye Rose!" a loud chorus echoed all around me. I watched as men in tuxedo's and woman in formal dresses each being a different colour waved goodbye to the woman in the elegant white dress. Her hand was linked with her now, new husband as they proceeded a white-stretched limo.

I watched as my two best friends held each other shredding tears of joy. Alice looked beautiful with her new re-dyed jet black hair and new cut. Her hair was still short- just the way she liked it- her side layers were cut into a straight v going down- identical to one of Rihanna's cuts. Her tiny figure pulled off the extremely tight strapless hot pink bubble dress. Jasper wrapped his arms around her; never letting go. I smiled to myself seeing how happy the couple was.

I noticed Serena too was smiling as Jasper placed a soft kiss on her cheek. Alice beamed and turned around to wrap her arms around him. Serena stiffened a little but then brought back the smile though it wasn't as wide like before.

Serena stood there admiring the couple as well. Her long blond hair curled and hung freely down her back. The red number looked indescribable on her. Her figure was like an hourglass and had legs to die for. She was similar to Rose. The two were absolutely exquisite. My self-esteem would always lower around them.

I always wondered why Serena hasn't gotten herself someone to hold too. She felt like an outsider of the group and I too, saw it. It's not like guys had no interest in her. She was beyond beautiful and had a perfect personality. Why wouldn't any guy go for her?

Ever since she left the academy and most of all left Shawn, I've seen that she's been suffering more than she let's anyone see. She was balling all of her emotions up inside and pretending to be happy. I spoke to her once about it but was told she didn't care for Shawn anymore. I personally thought she was out of her mind but it was Shawn's lost.

"I just want to be single for now," she once told me. "I feel so free and independent and I don't need a man to prove myself."

I loved that she was so confident. She didn't hold herself back from the world. She was strong. Unlike me.

I had stored every emotion inside of me that day I left the academy with the girls. I was like a sponge. I soaked in everything and squeezed it all out with tears. I didn't have the strength Serena had when she let go of Shawn. I pulled myself away from the experience of a lifetime and screwed up.

I didn't want to be on the front covers. I never intended to be the center of attention but that's what I got for being so idiotic.

I never forgave myself for leaving Edward. That morning I woke up, it was with him beside me and I never wanted to let go. I was told shortly about my sleep talking overnight. He told me I tossed and turned, screaming his name telling him it was going to be okay. That I'd miss him and I didn't want to leave. That was true but I was stuck in the middle. Between someone I had just met and fell in love with to my sister whom I've known my whole life and two best friends.

It was either don't sign the deal and stay or sign the deal and go. I chose my second option. Be selfish and leave. It was such a rough time for me. I felt as if the weight of the world was on my shoulders and my knees were becoming weak every step I took.

I was aware of the pain I had caused Edward and the heartbreaks I gained because of my decisions. I didn't blame him for being angry at me (I assumed) when he didn't pick up my calls. I was so angry and upset after that. How could he give me a silver bracelet with a diamond heart representing his love for me and not speak to me for the next four years?

And as Serena once told me, all good things come to an end. It was a poor explanation and I didn't quite understand it.

A lot of good things have come and gone. My past relationships, I believed were going to last a life time but obviously they never worked. I was convinced when I had my first boyfriend that love was real. Love existed. We didn't last very long. He told me he loved me once but I was to scared to say it back. What if I really didn't love him? And what if he was just saying that?

So after my first break-up I wasn't too sure I wanted to date again. Then I met David. I had met him through a friend outside of school. Since Rose and I went to an all girl's school, we had outside friends introduce us to boys. David and I became good friends and eventually we became boyfriend and girlfriend. We lasted longer than my relationship with Justin but I just knew he wasn't the one.

Jacob was incredible. We were friends for a long time since our fathers were best friends. With all the moving around, I hadn't seen him very often. But Charlie, Rose and I moved back to Forks, WA when Charlie didn't have any projects to cover for a few months.

I was able to catch up with my childhood best friend. He was my sunshine in Forks. One day when we were at the LA Push beach, Jake confessed his feelings to me. He admitted he liked me for a long time but through our friendship I only thought of him as a friend. He gave me time to think when I had told him I needed my own space. I never thought about being more than friends with Jake but as the days went by my feelings for him developed. We lasted twice as long as my past relationships. About two years to be exact. But I never liked to talk or think about it. A part of me still loved him but I had Edward now.

The moment I laid my eyes on Edward I knew I wasn't the girl for him. I knew I had no chance to be with such a Greek God but it happened and I was so thankful.

I regretted a lot of things that happened between us. I didn't like that I was such a jerk to him when all he wanted was to be friends. I had hurt him multiple times and it hurt me that I caused him so much pain. I love Edward with all my heart and I wasn't willing to let go again. Once was enough.

But whenever I think of all good things come to an end, I get all nervous and shaky. What if me and Edward came to an end? I would never be ready for that day to come and if it did, I would respect his decision but know I couldn't live without him. I'd rather die than be without him.

"Love?" the familiar strong arms wrapped around me. I tilted my head up to meet his eyes. I held onto his golden tie that matched the colour of my maid of honour dress. I looked deeply into his warm green eyes and saw myself in his future. I smiled at the thought of me walking down the aisle ready to be Edward's forever. But it hurt to think about it. What if Edward didn't want me?

His lips met mine in a heartbeat. It was short but passionate. Enough to show how much he cared for me. My hands moved from his tie to his folded hands on my stomache. I placed mine on top of his and he brought our hands up to place a sweet peck on my knuckles.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked.

"What? They left already?" I looked at the now empty stairs in front of me. The red carpet was no longer occupied by Rose and Emmett's guest. Flower pedals covered most of the ground and the cool breeze brushed against my exposed skin.

"Yes," he chuckled. "Rose and Emmett were trying to say goodbye but you were just lost in your own world. Don't worry they promised to call. And Charlie left earlier."

I felt the water beginning to fog up my eyes but I held them back. I couldn't believe I didn't catch a last glimpse of the two. They were going off to their honeymoon and I wouldn't see them for three weeks at the most with Alexis. Charlie wasn't a deal because I'd be seeing him tomorrow for lunch.

I protested against Rose about taking Alexis with them on their honeymoon. It was way too much trouble for them and they deserved their peace and quiet. They deserved to be alone. After all, they had just gotten married. Rose was being as stubborn as I was with this. She had let me know I needed some time with Edward and the gang. Apparently I was over-working myself taking care of Alexis and I wasn't the only responsible one. So after a couple of hours I finally gave in. At least now I wouldn't be interrupted in a good dream at night, right?

"Did you find out where they're going?" It didn't matter to me but Emmett was keeping it a secret from us for the past weeks. He stated it had to be a surprise and wouldn't let any of us in on the plan. He didn't trust us enough and I playfully let him know it hurt and that I wouldn't make the official superhero day. He just laughed and shrugged it off.

"No. Emmett still wouldn't spill the beans. He wanted it to be a surprise for Rosalie and he figured if one of us knew, Rose would get it out of us."

"How long have I been zoned out for?" It was sad that I didn't even realize it and my own sister left without me saying goodbye. It was all my fault though.

"Not very long," he sighed. "We should get going. Alice, Serena and Jasper are already at the house." Well, that was fast.

I nodded and walked back to his car holding onto his hand. He opened the passenger door for me and closed it once I got in. Oh, I forgot to mention he also strapped me in safely. I felt like a 5 year old all over again.

I watched him drive through the entire ride. Sometimes he would catch me looking and I'd look away blushing madly. When I would look back at him he had on his lopsided grin; his eyes focused on the road.

I studied his face for the first time in what seems like forever. I was always aware of his good looks but it wouldn't hurt to see why. His jawline was fierce and hard. It outlined his face perfectly. I also noticed his incredibly long eyelashes and then his green eyes met mine.

"What are you looking at, love?" his voice was teasing. It was pretty clear he knew but I had a feeling he just loved to see me blush.

I looked down and played with my hands. I felt like a wimp ignoring him. I lifted my head back up and my brown eyes met his. "What? I can't admire my boyfriend's good looks?" I smiled.

He smiled in response. My favourite, crooked smile that could make all my rough problems disappear. "So it's my good looks that you only care for?"

"No!" I scowled. "Do you know how dazzling you are?" I couldn't help but giggle at the word 'dazzling'.

He tried hard not to take his eyes off the road. I intertwined his hand with mine and gave it a little squeeze. When we stopped at a red light he turned to me. "Dazzling?" he questioned.

"Yes." I blushed.

He cocked his head to the side. "Really?"

I nodded. "Do I dazzle you?"

"You had to ask?" I looked at him like he was foolish.

"Of course." he smirked. "Well?"

"Yes you dazzle me," I grinned. "Frequently." He leaned in to give me a chast kiss. My lips craved his for more but we had to pull apart. We didn't want to cause traffic. I giggled in my seat and leaned my head against the window.

* * *

"So Bella, Serena and I were thinking the five of us should go out for dinner." Alice came into my room and sat casually on my bed. Edward had left me alone to change and was downstairs accompanying Jasper.

"Sure I guess. I just need to change." My eyes darted to my very messy closet. Alice got up and ran over squealing.

"Yes Alice, you may pick me outfit because I gave you permission too." I rolled my eyes sarcastically.

Alice began throwing out articles of clothing. Each landing on the floor or on my bed. "Sorry Bella! You should know me by now though."

I laughed. "I know, I know. Where's Serena?"

"Getting ready of course." I sat on my bed patiently waiting for Alice to come out of my closet already.

"Okay, done." she grinned and threw something black at me.

I lifted the dress and examined it. It was an off the shoulder drop waist dress. I remember Rose bought this for me once to wear to some party but I ended up not going. The dress was simple and sexy so I didn't have a problem with wearing it tonight.

Alice went to go check on Serena leaving me with my privacy. I slipped on the dress and stood in front of the full length mirror. There was a wide fold on the top an inch below my shoulders and layered over my chest. The sleeves were 3/4 ending with satin cuffs. There was also a satin band that marked the drop waist and the dress ended mid-thigh.

"Aw Bella you look beautiful!" Serena opened her arms to give me a hug. I followed after her returning the hug. I blushed and looked at myself once more in the mirror before my eyes hovered to her. My self-esteem had definitely decreased.

She was wearing a black and purple colour-block x-front dress. It was extremely tight on her body which brought her figure out nicely. Her dress too ended at mid-thigh and her killer long legs made mine look short and ugly looking. Her pumps were deadly. Something I couldn't pull off.

"I don't like like anything compared to you." I grinned.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh shut up. You're gorgeous I don't know why you think less of yourself." She said it like I was the most clueless person in the universe. And I truely didn't think I was as gorgeous as everyone complimented me as. I always wondered what Edward sees in me.

I excused myself to the bathroom where I did my hair. I clipped up my bangs making it volumized and curled the rest of my hair. I applied light make-up on myself and grabbed a pair of my favourite brand of shoes in the world: converse. I wasn't planning on wearing killer heels tonight. I think I walked in enough of those death traps for the day. I was still stunned of how I was able to walk in them without falling.

I met the others downstairs. Alice was wearing a simple black number but still looked adorable. She grinned when she saw me coming down the stairs but then frowned when she saw my footwear.

"Bella you cannot wear that with this dress!" she cried.

I rolled my eyes. "Alice it's my outfit I can wear what I want."

"But it doesn't even match!" she whined until Jasper came over and held her by the waist.

"Alice sweetie, let's go in the car now." She didn't have a chance to argue with me again. I'd have to thank Jasper later.

"You look...wow." Edward's cool breathe tickled my ear. I giggled and turned around to meet his eyes. He was really taken in by the view before him but personally, he was the breathtaking one here.

He wore a simple black dress shirt and black slacks. His shirt hugged his torso tightly; you could see the wonderful outlines of his muscular chest. I wouldn't be surprised if he told me I was drooling.

"Wow doesn't even describe the way you look tonight." I eyed him from head to toe again before winking and skipping over to his volvo. Alice, Jasper and Serena were squeezed in the back while Edward and I were happily comfortable in the front.

The whole ride was hilarious. Alice and Edward fought over the radio. Edward wanted classical while Alice made rude comments about Debussy and demanded for some 'real music' as she put it.

Jasper was awfully quiet but was the one who calmed Alice down. Serena and I were just laughing at the entertainment before our eyes. We also played "I Spy" to past time. Edward always chose the difficult objects to spy. I was beginning to think half the things he said weren't even existing.

We made it to the extremely crowded restaurant in a matter of time. Edward helped me out the car and his hand snaked it's way around my waist. I looked up at the name and was stunned at the bright shining lights around each letter.

"Oh my gosh! Toxique! I remember this place!" Alice squealed and shot a grin to me.

I laughed out loud. "Aw, I do to." Specifically for one reason. Toxique was the restaurant I had first officially met Edward. I remember the day so well. Rose and I had gone shopping with Alice that morning. We also met Jasper. Alice asked us to accompany her to dinner with her siblings. I was nervous when I walked in and was even more nervous when I first saw Emmett. He was incredibly big- well built and so scary looking. I laughed at myself afterwards when I found out he was a playful guy. I was breathless when Alice introduced me to Edward. It was also the first day I had gotten angry with him and it was something I didn't like to think about it either.

We walked inside literally being surrounded by a whole group of fans. Edward frowned when I let go of his hand to sign a few autographs. I gave him an apologetic smile and nodded my chin towards the table where he and Jasper sat down at.

Our fans were amazing but at times I wished they wouldn't interrupt us.

We made it to the table several minutes after. I was all sweaty and gross from the body heat around me from our fan encounter. I left to go to the bathroom and cleaned myself up. I didn't look too bad after all.

"I ordered a coke for you, if you don't mind." I sat down beside Edward and snuggled closer to him.

"No it's fine. I could really use some of that right now." I fanned myself with my hand. It didn't help that there were bright lights hanging above us. Boy, was it hot in here.

"Bella are you ready for the tour?" I was surprised that Jasper was speaking now. He was so quiet so far. Not like before.

"No," I sighed knowing I'd have to be away from Edward again. "But what choice do I have?"

I kind of envied Rose. She had an excuse not to come. But I loved my job and tours weren't so bad. Very tiring but fun once your on stage and the fans are screaming uncontrollably.

"Oh Bella I hope you don't mind, I invited a few other people."

"Who?" I looked at Alice questioningly. Then to Edward assuming he knew. I was wrong.

"That's for me to know and you to find out," she grinned then pointed to the door. "Oh there they are!"

I turned around to find Shane and Jake walking towards our table. More screaming fans nearly ran over them. Our whole table shook with laughter.

It was sort of uncomfortable seeing the two of them here. One of them was my ex-boyfriend and the other had a celebrity crush on me. I also ran away with him to London. And here at the table was my current boyfriend. This was not a good mix.

"Alice of all people!" I hissed at her.

She shrugged and called the two over patting the available seats next to her and Serena.

I looked at Serena who didn't seemed bothered by our new guests. She realized the shock on my face and mouthed 'it's ok' before smiling at me. I sighed in my seat and leaned onto Edward some more. Why was I being so dramatic over this? I mean it was only dinner with friends.

"Hey Bells." I stood up to return Jake's hug and hugged Shane as well. The three of us sat down and immediately made conversation with each other. I tuned everyone out but Edward. I looked up at him and saw the masked confusion on his face.

"What's wrong?" I said in his ear. The resturant was unbelivably loud. It was hard to hear what the person next to you was saying at times.

"Nothing at all," he replied smoothly. "Are you feeling okay?"

I gave him a disappointing look. "Of course I am. Just a little claustrophobic in here."

"Do you want to go elsewhere?" I felt the rumble in my stomach and blushed a little. I was somewhat glad this place was noisy otherwise the whole table would of hear that.

I nodded. "After we eat though? My little belly's hungry."

He chuckled his sweet, melodic laugh. "Let's feed Eddie Jr, shall we?" he winked and rubbed my stomach. I laughed with him as he called the waiter over.

A handsome young man, probably our age, walked over to our table. Though no one could ever put Edward in second place. The waiter was cute but when you had Edward, all the boys were put to shame. "Hello my name is Tony I'm your waiter for tonight. Are you ready to order?" I noticed he was directing everything to me.

Edward put his arm around my waist again and this time his lips met mine and parted them slowly. His tongue escaped his lips and found it's way into my mouth. The sweet taste of his breath glued onto me. I threw my arms around his neck; his hands tangling in my hair. I pushed away shortly. His lips moved to my neck. I blushed fiercely as the waiter eyed me then glared at Edward. I chuckled nervously and pulled Edward off of me.

The whole table seemed to notice Edward's behaviour as well but turned to the waiter.

All 7 of us ordered and handed the waiter back the menus. The waiter winked at me and walked to the bar. My mouth was wide open as were my eyes. I watched his movement. Was he trying to flirt with me?

"Jealous much, Edward?" Alice laughed.

Jasper chuckled. "You should of seen the look on your face man."

"I don't like the way he was looking at my Bella." he growled through his teeth. I like how he said 'my Bella'. I chuckled sweetly at him and kissed his cheek.

"You are incredibly adorable when you're jealous." I whispered in his ear. "I think I should call him over again."

"I don't think so. Not on my watch." he warned me. Clearly he didn't take this as a joke.

"Aw, you guys are so cute!" Serena gushed. I saw the small hint of hurt in her eyes and I immediately felt guilty for some odd reason.

"So Serena," Jake began. "Where are you from?"

I swear Serena turned a light shade of pink the moment she made eye contact with Jake. But what I found strange was that she looked at Shane too who winked at her. She smiled lightly clearly trying to prevent from giggling. Something was definitely up.

"Well, I was born in Italy but was raised in Cincinnati." she stated matter of fact.

"What are your hobbies?" Shane interrupted as Jake opened his mouth to say something.

I had a feeling this whole night was going to be Shane and Jake competing for Serena's heart. Oh boy. I felt like I had just landed in one of those T.V dramas.

Alice and Jasper emerged in their own conversation. As predicted Shane and Jake dedicated their night to Serena. Edward and I snuggled in comfortable silence sitting there taking in every sweet moment.

I watched as Serena battered her eyelashes and sighing every time Shane or Jake spoke. Alice had just exploded in giggles to what something Jasper said and randomly started making-out in front of us. No one seemed to notice but me.

The waiter finally came and served us our meals. We were brought together as a group again and shared embarrassing stories.

"... It was embarrassing!" Serena was telling us about a day when she went to the mall and ordered a burrito. About twenty minutes after, she was feeling gasy and she was with her crush too and she accidentally cut the cheese. "It wasn't my fault it was a mean burrito. The gas smelt so bad and I did it right in front of my crush!"

Shane's eyes were bewildered and Jake was just drooling in his seat. "I didn't go to school for three days after that." she blushed.

"What about you Edward? Got any embarrassing stories?" Shane asked. I still felt weird being around the both of them at the same time. They looked so much alike it was insane.

"Don't even get me started on Edward!" Alice butted in. "I've got tons of him!"

"Alice don't," Edward warned. "I've got some on you too." he grinned deviously.

"Oh really?" she raised her eyebrow at him.

"Yes, I do actually. Would you like to give it a shot?"

She opened her mouth to say something but then shut it and shook her head. "That's what I thought." Edward concluded. I was curious to know what it was but if I opened my mouth, this night would be an endless argument between the two siblings.

The rest of the hour continued like that before we finally called it a night. We said goodbye to Shane and Jake. I was surprised dinner didn't become awkward at all. It was great but I tuned them out most of the time. I hardly knew what happened at the table. Edward led us to his Volvo and strapped me in once again. Why did he have to be such a gentleman?

* * *

When we got home I quickly changed into some plaid shorts and a black tank. Alice called us in for a 'family night'. She got Edward and Jasper to go out to rent a couple of movies and buy a whole load of junk food.

We made use of our alone time while the boys were out.

"So Serena, what was that back there with Shane and Jake?" Alice teased. Funny, I was thinking the same thing.

Serena bit her lip and her eyes became thoughtful. We all knew what that look lead to. "You're kidding?!"

She shook her head. "I have like huge crushes on the both of them!" she admitted.

"Well girl you better do something about that 'cause you can't have both." Alice stated. Serena frowned and layed back onto the sofa.

"What am I going to do?" She groaned.

"Go on a date with each of them separately. See which one catches your interest the most." I suggested.

"I guess I could try that but can we not talk about this right now? I need some time to clear my mind."

"Okay but next time we're definitely not letting this go." At that moment we heard Edward's Volvo purr before it was turned off.

"Just on time."

Edward and Jasper came through the door with a blockbuster bag and two other bags filled with our junk food I assumed. I ran over to Edward and pulled his face down to mine. I broke the kiss and wrapped my arms around him. "God, I missed you."

He set the bags down and lifted me off the ground. He lifted me in the air and I held my hands out like a bird. "Say I'm a bird!" I shouted out. I remembered this line from the movie, "The Notebook." It was one of my favourite quotes and I thought that scene was just so romantic.

"You're a bird." Edward said coolly before lowering me. I wrapped my legs around his list and my hands cupped his face. Our lips moved in sync like they were made for each other. The kiss was more passionate than our others, clearly stating our hunger for each other. We were abruptly interrupted by the clearing of three throats. I blushed crimson when Edward carried me bridal style to the sofa and layed me gently. He sat down beside me and pulled me onto his lap. I grinned like an idiot. I would never get tired of this.

Alice and Serena set up the table with all the junk food purchased. From chips, to chocolate bars, to popcorn, to a whole variety of candy. I was definitely going to get high tonight on all that sugar.

"Jas, can you put in a movie please?"

"Sure," he looked at the pile on the floor. "Uh, which one?"

"John Tucker Must Die!" Serena beamed in her seat. "I love that movie!" she and Alice said in unison. We all laughed while Jasper popped in the disk. I leaned against Edward who had his arms secured around my waist.

Not even twenty minutes into the movie, I had already fallen asleep. So much for the sugar rush. The last thing I heard before falling into deep sleep was Edward's soft voice humming my lullaby.

* * *

**So what do you think of Bella dropping out of her career? It's not positive that it will happen, we'd just like to see your thoughts.  
& Serena going for Shane and Jake at the same time? Who would you want Serena to be with?  
We know there was lack of Jasper in this chap but with all these characters, it's hard to keep up! But don't worry, Jasper will still have  
a big role in this story like in BC:H&G.**

You know what to do, click those "Go" buttons below and write us a little review :)


	12. With Me

**We are so, so, so, so sorry for the long wait!  
Writer's block hit us again and we were busy with 'A Whole New World' while we overcame the terrible 'disease >;]'  
Anyway enough of us, (we hope we are forgiven), ENJOY! :D**

* * *

We had just finished the tour a couple of days ago and sleep overcame us since. Sleep was hardly a routine during the three week tour across North America.

It was all about rehearsing, eating, relaxing, rehearsing again and then off to the real stage. There was hardly time for just us anymore.

The boys decided to come with us this time and Carly gladly allowed them to but the problem was Alexis. Carly strictly told us she wasn't allowed to come and as much as I tried to change her mind, I failed. So Alexis ended up staying with Carlisle and Esme.

The fans have honestly been amazing and supportive. It was nice knowing people out there looked up to us. They held giant neon posters with crazy, commical messages written across it as well as photos of the group. Fans apparently cried a few times from our performances and it was amazing that the emotions could spread out like that.

But above all, the smiles and laughter echoing from the audiences while we preformed our new album really touched me. They were having fun, I was having fun, we all were and that was an experience I was glad I could be sharing.

Though I've been having second thoughts about this type of life. Now that I had Edward and having responsibilites with Alexis, being away from the two wasn't quite right. And I couldn't do it anymore.

I didn't know if I was ready to drop out or if I was even positive about this decision. Even if I was doing the right thing for myself, it would be harder for everyone else. I wasn't sure how the group would react to it. Not to mention Carly. It'd be more difficult to speak with her and to be honest, I was quite frightened to approach her. Or anyone.

So, today was a girl's night. Just me, Rose, Alice and Serena. "No boys allowed". Alice clearly stated earlier. Which caused Rose and I to groan and we all knew Alice was dying inside too. She and Jasper soon became inseparable just like the rest of us.

Serena couldn't choose between Shane or Jake yet.

We all told her to just take the time and think about her feelings but, she just wouldn't listen. She had plans with the two almost everyday, it was starting to get on our nerves. I felt bad for Shane and Jake since that day they both spoke with me about Serena.

Shane had called me once while I was at the theatre with Edward. I had to excuse myself because Shane had called the situation, "an emergency". Of course Edward got a little upset that Shane was pulling me away for something "unimportant" as he stated but had forgiven him soon after.

_"Bella, has Serena said anything about me?" he asked curiously the second I told him I was out of the theatre and alone. _

_"Minor details but I'm not sure I should let you know. Why?"_

_"I'm going out to dinner with her tonight," No kidding. They've been going at it for weeks now. "And I'm thinking of taking our relationship to the next level."_

_My jaw had dropped right then my eyes widely open. "As in, asking her out? For real now?"_

_He chuckled at my shocked tone and said, "Yes."_

_"Oh." Was all I could say._

_"You don't seem to excited for me Bella." he pouted payfully._

_"Oh yeah, I'm happy for you really. But I have to go now. Edward's waiting and I payed 14.95 for this ticket and I'm already missing more than half of the movie!" I exaggerated. But really, it was just an excuse to stop him from speaking further._

_"Oh sorry, my apologies. Enjoy the movie and thank you."_

_"No problem. Bye." I hung up the phone and sent a quick 'S.Y.S' text to Serena. Alice supposedly invented the 'S.Y.S' meaning "save your soul" instead of "save our souls". We were suppose to use that when one of us was in deep trouble and that precise moment, it was Serena._

Then not many minutes later when I had gone back and sat down next to Edward, I had to get up and leave again. That time it wasn't Shane.

Jake was planning the same thing. Asking Serena to take their relationship to the next level and Serena didn't deal with it too well. She cancelled both plans for the next week or so and literally spent her time crying over it.

And she wouldn't let anyone in. Not one of us. So there was really nothing we could do.

So tonight was dedicated to us girls and Serena came out of her shell during the tour and things were back to normal.

* * *

"Bewa!" Alexis came running into the kitchen. I learned that Alexis' walking had improved during the three weeks I was away. Now she was running all over the place and wouldn't let any of us pick her up unless necessary because she loved walking on her own.

She still couldn't pronounce my name. Instead of 'Bella' she called me 'Bewa' (beh-wa). She couldn't pronounce most of our names yet and she had her own way of calling us.

Edward became 'Eddie'. Alice became 'Aly'. Emmett became 'tweddy bwear'. Rose because 'Wosie' and Jasper became 'Japer'. It was quite adorable.

"Lexi!" was what we called her. We only called her 'Alexandra' when she had done something to upset us and 'Alexis' was used when she demanded for something and we had to help her understand to ask politely. Like when she would say, "Bewa gimme ice cweam!" I would simply say, "Alexis, what did we teach you about manners?" Edward mostly taught her about that.

She came running into my arms when I leaned off the stove and bent down on my knees, spreading out my inviting arms. "How are you?" I smiled and kissed her forehead when she was safely in my arms.

"Gwood," she smiled back. "Eddie sways we gwoing out!" she said enthousiasticly.

"Oh really? Where will we be going?" I raised my eyebrow. Edward never mentioned anything.

The both of us were soon startled by shrieking noises coming from a very joyous Alice. Lexi covered both of her ears as I laughed at her reaction. I kissed the tip of her nose and told her it was just Alice.

"Why Aly scweaming? She okway?" I loved the way her eyes suddenly filled up with water. I hushed her for a few seconds and ruffled her hair.

"Aunt Aly is just excited, that's all."

"We're going to Disneyland?! No way!" we heard Alice scream from upstairs. Suddenly the ceiling had loud thudding noises coming from above it. I assumed Alice was jumping up and down now.

"Disneywand?" Lexi's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. I laughed then shrugged carrying her with me up the stairs to Alice's room.

"Aw man! Alice you ruined our plan!" Emmett hissed when we walked in.

"I'm sorry," she pouted. "I was just so excite- oh hey Bella, Lexi!" Alice ran over and took Lexi into her arms.

"So what's this I hear about Disn-"

"Sh!" Emmett hissed again causing me to giggle. He then pointed to Lexi and placed a finger on his mouth to inform me to shut up.

"Oh" I mouthed.

"Where awe we gwoing?" Lexi pouted in Alice's arms.

"It's a surprise Lexi. Aunty Alice is going to take over now and get you all prettied up okay?" Alice's finger tickled Lexi's nose.

Lexi nodded and then grinned. She absolutely loved when Alice gave her a makeover and dressed her up. Alice was rubbing on Lexi faster than you can say one of those annoying tongue twisters.

Lexi was strong and intelligent for a two year old. She knew right from wrong so disciplining her was very rare. She knew not to disturb anyone when they were busy. She would always knock when a door is closed and waited for the person to respond. She didn't yell or scream when she wanted something or didn't get her way. She was well manered and picked up after herself. Sometimes she was more responsible than I was.

Emmett scooped her up from Alice's arms and threw her up and down into the air and pretending she was an airplane. Emmett and Lexi I would say had the strongest bond in the house. The two were wild and playful all the time and she just loved her oversized teddy bear.

Alice had me and Emmett leave the room so she could have space to doll up Lexi, as she put it. So Emmett and I left to change. He still wouldn't tell me the details of the plan. All I knew was, we were going on a trip to Disneyland.

I walked into my room only to find a sleeping Edward. I smiled and made my way over to him placing a quick peck on his pout. His eyes fluttered open and a big widened smile appeared on his face.

He reached out and pulled me down so I was lying on top of him. He pushed my head down with his hand on the back of my head and his other resting on the small of my back. And our lips met eachother's in a heartbeat.

"Goodmorning." I breathed against his lips. Edward always knew how to make my mornings incredible. Waking up to him beside me was first on the list.

"I love you." he smiled against my lips.

I gave him another peck and said, "I love you more."

He gave me an annoyed look. "I love you the most."

"I love you more than a million chocolate dipped strawberries," I grinned. Those were my favourite kind of desert. "Oh with sprinkles on top!" I added quickly before he could respond.

He laughed and kissed my head after placing it back onto his chest. "You are amazing, did you know that?"

I hugged him closer, if that were possible, and closed my eyes nodding. "I strongly disagree though."

"Only you." he said.

* * *

We layed like that for a few more minutes, enjoying eachother's company when Serena came barging in, in just her boxers and a bra. "Hey Bella I-"

She stopped when she noticed Edward was in the room. "Oh sorry." she mumbled.

"It's fine Serena, I was just going to leave," I frowned when he placed me onto the bed beside him and he got up. "I'll be in the bathroom," he chuckled when he saw my expression. "I won't be far." he joked and left.

"That was embaressing..." Serena whispered.

I laughed and shook my head. "It's just Edward. It's not like he saw you naked," I rolled my eyes. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to borrow that green shirt you hate."

"It's somewhere in the closet," I pointed to the open space where clothes hung out and covered the ground, "if you can find it."

She nodded and threw herself in. "Hey Bella, do you know where we're going?"

"Er, I heard something about Disneyland?" I just shrugged.

"Disneyland?"

"Yeah, Alice let it out but I'm not too sure. Apparently it's suppose to be a secret from Lexi but she heard Alice's shriek loud and clear so I guess she knows now."

"Aw she's so adorable." she came out with the green shirt she wanted re-adjusting it onto herself and looking in the mirror.

I always hated when my clothes looked better on her than myself. It just brought down my self-esteem.

"Thanks for the shirt, I have to finish getting ready."

"No problem it looks good on you by the way!" I called out when she slammed the door.

Edward came out only a few seconds later with just a towel tied around his waist. His hair was dripping wet like he had just shot a commercial for some new hair gel and his body was... oh my God. Get me out of here.

I groaned out loud by accident and my hand jerked to cover my mouth. "Oops." I mumbled.

"What's wrong, love?" he flashed me his amazing, heartmelting smile. This boy- or should I say man- was driving me insane.

I stumbled onto my feet and began marching to the door. "You're killing me Edward!" Was all I said before running out. Any second longer in there and I would of jumped him just like that.

I could hear his musical laughter coming from the other side of the door as I stuggled to catch up with my breath. Stupid, amazing, beautiful, gorgeous, exquisite, crazy, wonderful... (shall I go on?), boyfriend!

Like the idiot I was, I sat on the floor outside our door and waited until I could compose myself and come in to get dressed.

But my thoughts wouldn't stop leading to the man I love behind this door, getting dressed. In my room.

The things I would do... _stop it Bella!_

The door suddenly opened, causing me to jump. Edward just laughed and bent down on his knees behind me. "You can come in now." he laughed again.

I loved the sound of his laugh and all but, not when he was teasing me. He scooped me up and placed me onto the bed. With him on top of me. Though he was holding himself so his weight wasn't on me.

"Did I upset you?" he looked into my hopes. I was already lost in them.

I shook my head since I couldn't find my voice. Did he always have to be so dazzling?

"I'm just curious," he bit his lip, "How exactly am I killing you?" he looked at me under his eyelashes in a supposedly angelic way.

I couldn't help it. The next thing I knew was my hands tangled with his wild hair and pushed his face towards mine. His hand moved to cup my face and his other hand still supported his weight beside me. His lips met mine roughly and this was one heck of a kiss.

He pulled away too soon though reminding me I was still undressed for the event and we were leaving shortly. I rolled my eyes when he got off of me and sat down on the edge of the bed instead.

Without a word I hopped out of bed and pulled out a fresh new outfit then rushed into the bathroom, turning on the warm water in the shower.

When I was finished, I threw on my clothes and straightened my hair. I didn't both putting on some make-up and didn't care if Alice threw a fit.

* * *

I met everyone downstairs in the kitchen where they spoke about who goes in who's car.

I rolled my eyes when I saw Lexi in Alice's arms. Alice had gotten her into a hot pink tutu with white stockings underneath, a thin long sleeved white shirt and black flats. She over did it with the pigtails on either side of her head and the silver crown resting on top. Not to mention the hair ties were bows and the light make-up splattered on her face. Typical Alice.

"Alice! She's not your personal barbie doll!" I gawked at her, taking Lexi into my own arms. Alice smirked while everyone else laughed.

"Bella chill, she looks so beautiful!" Rose cooed at her.

"Make-up?" I raised my eyebrow at an innocent looking Alice. "You put make-up on a two year old!"

"Only a little!" she defended. "Come on Bella, cut me some slack over here!" Lexi suddenly started crying as she burried her face in my hair.

"Nwo fwighting!" she kept yelling out but it sounded like mumbles. I patted her on the back lightly and even rocked her in my arms. Emmett came into the kitchen briefly and mouthed 'what happened'. Rose just shook her head and grabbed the keys from the counter.

"We're not fighting," Alice said comforting her. "Bella's just being silly, right Bella?"

My eyebrows pulled together and my mouth dropped open but then shut and I let out a sigh. "Yeah, yeah. All better Lexi?"

She gave me a tight hug and nodded. I wiped the tears off her face and she smiled. "There's the Lexi I know."

So when that was resolved, everyone double checked the seating plan.

"So, Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rose will ride in Emmett's jeep." Edward confirmed.

"And Serena will join us."

We all nodded and dispursed out of the house. We took Edward's volvo since it was the current car with Lexi's car seat. Serena sat in the back with Lexi and I sat in the front with Edward.

Five minutes into the drive, Lexi asked for us to stop by Baskin Robbins for some ice cream.

"Lexi we'll stop by later, okay?" Serena said in the back but Lexi groaned again.

"Nwo mwe wants the ice cweam now!" she said furiously. Edward sighed in his seat and stopped the car at the stoplight.

He looked into the mirror to see Lexi. "Lexi, we will get your ice cream but not right now. We're almost there, can you sit still for a few more minutes?"

"Nwo!" she grumbled. "Ice cweam! Ice cweam!"

"Alexis Dwyer!" I hissed but to a calm tone so she wouldn't cry and I didn't sound so mean. "Listen to Edward please."

And she started crying.

Serena began hushing her to stop and Edward started driving again. He stopped at the nearest Baskin Robins and Lexi started cheering.

"Edward what are you doing?"

"I'm getting her ice-cream. Would you like some?" he smiled at me.

I shook my head. "Edward you can't always spoil her! She needs to learn how to accept the word 'no' and she won't be learning any more if you keep letting her have her way."

He shut the door on me which caused me to gawk at him while he walked over to my side and opened the door. I could hear Serena giggle in the backseat.

He reached out his hand and I took it, stepping out of the car with him.

"We'll be back." he told Serena. She nodded and continued to play with Lexi.

"Bella, love, don't be mad." he had me leaning my back onto the passanger seat of the volvo. His hands were placed on either side of me. His face inches away from mine.

"I'm not mad Edward."

"Are you sure?"

I nodded.

He raised his eyebrow at me. "If you think I'm spoiling her..."

"And you are."

"So that's a bad thing?" he frowned a little.

I nodded. "Edward she needs to learn how to be disciplined."

"I just want her to happy."

"I know," I wrapped my arms around his waist. "And you're doing a wonderful job by buying her all the toys in the world." I rolled my eyes.

He sighed and wrapped his arms around me as well. "It makes me happy that she can accept the gift," he said. I immediately felt bad. "without fussing. It's just nice to give and she takes, you know? I can't do that with you. You would argue with me until I return the gift and get my money back."

I groaned and burried my head into his chest. I hated when he always used that with me! "Would it make you any happier if for once, I would gladly accept your gifts?" A smile stretched across his face. I could tell when I felt his jaw untense. "But always know Edward, no matter what, your love is the greatest gift of all. You've already given me you and I couldn't ask for anything more."

He kissed the top of my head and hugged me tighter. "Of course I know. I love you Isabella."

"I love you too Edward."

Lexi started screaming from instead the car so with that being done, we rushed into the parlour and ordered our ice-creams. When we came back, Lexi bounced in her car seat- kind of reminded me like Alice- and digged in cheerfully.

We gave Serena her cone and I enjoyed my share with Edward.

* * *

"Took you guys long enough!" Emmett pouted when we met the group at the front enterance. Jasper and Alice had already gone to buy the tickets and Rose stayed back with him, holding a map in her hands.

"Sorry, Lexi wanted some ice-cream."

"Hello my little princess!" Emmett scooped her up and cooed at her. She giggled and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Mwy tweddy bear!"

The couple came back shortly handing each of us out tickets. Lexi just beamed with excitement when we walked in as a group. She walked in the middle of Edward and I, holding each of our hand's. Occasionally she'd let go and point to whatever her eyes caught and ask if we could go there.

Eventually the group would be parting off. Emmett and Rose were the first to go their seperate ways. Followed by Alice, Jasper and Serena. So that left me, Edward and Lexi.

We went through various attractions during the day. I would say we covered more than half the attractions they had. Lexi was over excited and literally dragged us in line for everything. She'd see one thing, then we'd line up for it and during that ride or show, she would see another thing and then grab our hands and pull us with her. She was just filled with amusement.

It was heartwarming to see Edward picking her up and throwing her onto his back. She hung her small arms around his neck and his hands locked behind her knees, holding her up on his back. And I could see her eyes glowing the same way Edward's was. She would point to all the 'magical' things she would see and Edward would laugh and ask if she'd like to go take a look. Sometimes, she would see the characters like mickey mouse, goofy, donald duck and Edward would take her to get a picture. At one point she would get scared and hide behind him and Edward would bend to her level and say something to make the frightening face disappear. He had as much of a power on her than he had on me.

Our last ride of the day was the log ride in Splash Mountain. Lexi sat in between Edward's legs and I sat in the back of them. The ride was amazing but the annoying feeling of the adrenaline rush came when the log suddenly sprinted downwards and a huge puddle of water splashed onto us. Thank goodness Alice packed extra clothes for us.

We got changed and met up with the group at the "Hungry Bear Resturant" were we were to have dinner then leave.

Dinner was longer than usual. We sat at our table for about two hours before deciding it was time to leave because Lexi was looking exhausted. She actually fell asleep on Edward so he carried her to the car.

Disneyland was a fun experience and I shared it with the most amazing family I could ever ask for. Except for the part when Edward would go into the gift shops and end up with bags filled with toys for Lexi and presents for me. But I told him I'd accept it so I didn't fuss.

* * *

"Did you ladies have fun?" Edward asked five minutes into the drive home. I nodded my head and Serena replied a smile, "yes" in the backseat.

"You both sound dead," he chuckled. "Long day?"

"Mmhmm."

"I mostly followed Alice and Jas around. It was actually kind of boring for me. I was just a third wheel." she laughed. I shot my head up and turned around to face Serena.

"Aw you poor thing," I jutted out my bottom lip for special effects. "Why didn't you invite er, uh, one of them?" I wasn't sure who to say.

"I don't know," she shrugged. "I wanted to spend time with the family?" she smiled smugly.

"You still haven't decided?"

She shook her head. "I like the both of them!" she threw her hands in the air dramatically. "It's so hard to decide. They both like me, I like them. But I can't have both. Why can't I have both?" she pouted.

"It's simple," Edward butted in. "It would be cheating and that's not such a pleasant thing to do."

"Thank you captain obvious." She rolled her eyes and I laughed. Edward smirked at her in the mirror.

"Who would you want to be with more?" I asked casually.

This only drove her insane. "Both of them!"

"One of them has to at least draw more attention to you." She bit the bottom of her lip nervously and blushed a light pink. I knew what the look meant.

"Which one?!" I yelled out with my eyes wide open.

Edward became startled and jumped in his seat only to make the both of us laugh. "What happened?" he asked after composing himself.

Serena wouldn't open her mouth. Her blush became deeper. "Spill Welsford!"

"Oh no, you're not spilling anything in my car! You spill, you clean up!" Edward warned us. I shook my head at him.

"_Babe,_" I stretched the word out for him and placed my hand on top of his. I only called him that silly nickname to calm him down. "By spill, we don't mean we're going to spill anything in your car," I suddenly laughed at how silly Edward looked. "I mean, spill the news."

He chuckled nervously and focused his attention onto the road. "My bad." he mumbled.

I turned back to Serena after leaning over and kissing his cheek only he moved his face towards me so my lips ended up kissing his. Sneaky little devil.

"Ok, so go on Serena. I'm still waiting you know." I winked at her.

"Okay, on my third date with Shane, we sort of..." she blushed deeper. "We sort of made out. And by made out I don't mean like sitting there casually like you see in sappy romance movies. I mean the full wild-"

I laughed and cut her off. "Say no more."

Edward joined in with me soon after. "Didn't know you had it in you blondie." Blondie was Serena's nickname from Edward. It fit her well but it seemed harsh in a way. She didn't mind though. Serena's blush became firetruck red. Redder than what I usually blush. I figured she regretted telling us.

She sat quiet the whole time.

* * *

"Absolutely no boys!" Alice stomped her foot- for the first time ever- and pointed her finger to the sad looking men staring in disbelief at Alice. She was repeating the rules to them about our girl's night and they agreed on taking care of Lexi.

"But Rose!" Emmett pouted and held his arms out hopelessly.

"Sorry Em. Alice is the boss. And you don't want to disobey her." she shot him an apologetic smile. Jasper on the other hand wouldn't give up.

"Alice I'm sure we can work something out here!" his voice was so desperate. By the looks of it, Alice was trying hard not to change her mind. She shook her head calmly.

"Sorry Jazzy," she went on her tiptoes and placed a peck on his lips. "It wouldn't be a girl's night if you boys were allowed to join."

"It doesn't have to be a girl's night then," Emmett whined. "It could be family night." he grinned sheepishly.

I looked at Edward who looked just as desperate as the other two. His eyebrows were pulled together and his bottom lip lightly jutted out each time Alice said no. I couldn't help but smile to myself at how cute he looked. I was beginning to find excuses to get myself out of this girl's night and spend the rest of the night with Edward. Too bad Alice was such a control freak. You do not want to underestimate her.

His green eyes met mine and they were no longer light. It was replaced with a darker shade of green and his jaw was tensed.

I walked over to him and stood beside him, wrapping my arms around his waist. He did the same too and rested his cheek against my hair. "I don't want to be seperate from you." he said so hopelessly.

I reached up and kissed him on the lips but quickly. If I didn't pull away soon enough, it would turn out into a full on makeout session. And Alice wouldn't be too pleased.

"I'll sneak." I replied.

"...and there will be no sneaking!" Alice stated. I blushed crimson. Alice had definitely heard me. Now there was no way escaping this evil pixy. But it wouldn't be so bad. We definitely needed a girl's night but it was so hard being away from Edward.

Edward groaned beside me and glared at Alice. I squeezed his cheeks together with my one hand and moved his head to face me.

"It won't be so bad," I tried to convince him but his pout grew bigger. "I love you!" I tried convincing him again with a desperate tone. He bent his head down and our lips began moving in the many rythms we created.

We were soon broke apart by Alice. "Guys!" she said. "Come on Bella, enough with the makeout sessions you'll have plenty of time to do that tommorrow and the day after." she pulled me by the ear but I slapped her hand away and told her I could walk by myself. Then smiled at her to let her know I was playing.

I didn't even have time to say goodbye to Edward when she linked her arm around mind and towed me up to her bedroom with Rose and Serena following behind.

"Okay now that the guy's aren't here, let's get down to buisness." We were sitting crossed legged in a circle on her gigantic bed. We were already changed into our PJs so we didn't have an excuse to leave her room. Food was already brought up as well as drinks and she had her own enterainment system. There was absolutely no way I could get out of this room. She already planned ahead and had everything we needed.

We mainly started with some celebrity gossip. Then it lead to fashion, upcomming events such as movie premiers, parties we were invited to, what we were going to wear and all that jazz. We were now covering Serena's problem.

"I think you should just call the both of them and let them know about your feelings." Rose shoved a handful of popcorn in her mouth. Alice nodded throughout her whole sentence.

"Yeah I mean, if they found out you were going on dates with the both of them, who do you think they'd feel?" How could they possibly have not known? We were celebrities and celebrities were always on the news for little things. How could someone have not seen Serena with Jake then Serena with Shane in one night?

"It's just so hard!" Serena grumbled. "They both make me happy and I'd hate to hurt one of them."

"Who do you feel more comfortable around? Listen to your heart, not your mind." Alice said. The three of us looked at Serena as she bit her lip, thinking.

"I could tell Shane anything," she spoke. "And he's a great listener. He'd listen to me blab on about things that weren't even important and we he wouldn't complain once about it."

"Well there you go!" Rose clapped her hands together but then stopped when Serena said "but".

"Ugh!" Alice glared at her playfully.

"Jake is always there for me too!" she battered her eyelashes and sighed. "If I had a problem, he'd turn the situation around and make me laugh and whenever he did that, it would seem like my problems would disappear and I had nothing to worry about."

"You're right," I said. "That is hard. I know how Jake is and he's just as crazy for you and Shane's a great guy. I'd hate to be you." I grinned playfully at her which only caused her to frown some more.

"Keep frowning and watch the wrinkles start to take over!" We all looked annoyingly at Alice. She stopped smiling and looked down at her hands.

"So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I guess I just need more time to think. But anyway, enough of me. What's up with you guys?"

We each started off ranting about our past couple of days and Rose told us all about her honeymoon which really sounded amazing. Then Alice started to speak about how she and Jasper were doing until Serena kindly stopped her and ask if we could talk about another subject.

So, we started to randomly bring up Beverly Hills Academy and the fun things Emmett and Jasper told Rose and Alice about. Prom happened to be one of the subjects.

"They had it at some hotel, I can't remember the name but apparently it was all fancy and they had a DJ, caterers. Oh my gosh, it sounded like so much fun! I can't believe we missed out on it!"

"Believe me Rose," I said. "I do too and the way Edward described it was so depresseing he just spoke about how he wished I was there and I want to make it up to him. I felt so bad that he had a horrible time at his first and only prom."

"Wait," Alice's eyes lit up and her eyebrows wiggled. Rose looked at me in confusion but then laughed when her eyebrows wiggled. "I have an idea."

"Spill!" we all said.

"Okay, so, apparently the boys didn't have so much fun and wanted us to be there..."

"And..." I moved my hand in a dramatic way encouraging her to continue.

"So why don't we make prom happen again?" she bounced in her seat.

We eventually started clapping with her. "Alice that's such a great idea!" Serena threw her arms around her.

"I know." Alice grinned like a genius. Why hadn't I thought of that?

"How are we going to do it?"

"We could call up the school, and oh my gosh! We could have a reunion but a prom based one!"

We all errupted into squeals and laughter. "Yeah! We could call up the school and get everyone's numbers- hopefully they'd still live by the area so they could come down- and we'll book that hotel, invite everyone, have caterers come in, we'll have the exact same prom they had except we'd be there!"

"Oh I can't wait! This is going to be exciting!" Serena beamed. We all laughed with her. The excitement was very contagious.

"But here's the change," Alice grinned evily again. We all waited for her to continue. "We can't tell the boys and, we'll set them up on a scavenger hunt that day. We'll make up clues and have them go to places to find the next clue and all the clues will add up to a shoe that they bring to the hotel and match it with our shoes."

"Wait so like a Cinderella type of thing?"

"Duh!"

"Ooh, this is so exciting!"

And it really was. We were going to make prom happen for them again but this time, we were going to be there to share the experience.

Now prom was going to be looked back on as an amazing, wonderful experience. Not to mention the reunion with our old friends. I couldn't wait to create the excitement.

* * *

_(As you know, our chapter titles are based on songs, so we thought we'd be starting the chapter playlist & lyrics things for this story too)._

**With Me - Sum 41  
**_(Reflects on Bella to Edward)  
_  
Thoughts read unspoken  
Forever and know  
Pieces of memories  
Fall to the ground  
I know what I did and how so  
I won't let this go  
Cause it's true  
I am nothing without you

I don't want this moment  
To ever end  
Where every thing's nothing, without you  
I wait here forever just to,  
To see you smile  
Cause it's true  
I am nothing without you

* * *

**This was an exciting chapter to right (:  
Ideas for the prom/clues are welcomed, oh and songs you may want us to use.  
Reviews are highly appreciated! We had about 23 for the last one and are hoping  
to beat that for this chapter. Show this chap some love! :)  
Thanks again.**


	13. AN: IMPORTANT

_Hey everyone thanks for taking the time to read this._

Kate and I have come to a decision that we've been thinking about for a while.

We've decided to **end this sequel** without finishing it. We understand it's very unexpected and disappointing and we're sorry if we upsetted you in any way. We figured since updating was becoming longer, writer's block always comes to us when writing chapters and such, there's no point in us continuing. Again, we're sorry.

_We'd like to thank all of our readers who took the time to read this sequel to BC: Hello&Goodbye. We've come so far, farther than we expected and we really appreciate it._

But...

One thing we're looking forward to do is_re-writing **BC: Hello&Goodbye**_, so that no sequal is needed and everybody gets their happy endings. We're _not_ positive about this yet but, that's what is planned on being done.

We don't want to make this long so we'll end it off quickly.

Hollywood Here We Are will be deleted in about a week or so, so that all our readers are notified.

Thanks again, and we're really sorry if we disappointed you. We're also not happy but, it'll pass.

We loved writing this story and thank you for reading our work.

So anyway, thanks for understanding guys.

-Sarah&Kate


	14. Important Update!

Hello everyone, it's Sarah and Kate! This is just a quick message from us to you guys. So let's get down to business, shall we?

So many of you know that a while ago, stwe decided not to continue this story and told you that we might re-write BC:Hello&Goodbye so that everyone gets a happy ending. Well, as of now, we have been thinking that _**maybe we'd like to have one of you guys finish this story with us**_. As in, you'll be the **co-writer** :) If any of you have lost interest in this story because of the previous author's note, we understand and we won't consider finishing the story anymore if we lost our readers.

If we do find someone to co-write this story with us and fail to update due to our busy schedules, the story will be up for adoption or will be given to the co-writer if he/she is interested on continuing on their own.

What we are looking for in a co-writer are that you have:

1) Experience in writing (at least 2 or more stories on your fanfic account).

2) Access to a computer anytime you want so that if we were to write the chapters together, we won't have any problem on waiting for you to respond to us.

3) An e-mail account to send documents back and forth or any other method of transportation for the docs.

4) Read the first story to this sequel and reviewed at least three times with your opinion.

5) The ability to put yourself into the story and characters. (You can feel what they're feeling and imagine as if you were the character).

6) At least supported one of our stories throughout the journey.

7) That you have a wild, crazy, imagination. You can write the very emotional, depressing stages to the hilarious, tearful moments.

8) Someone we can cooperate with and is an outgoing person with a good personality.

9) And last, someone who can enjoy writing this story as much as we can :)

We plan on beginning the next chapter after exams are done so by the first week of February.

We know we have Moonless Nights incomplete as well as Kate's story "You Belong With Me" so we decided that at least once a week, we'll have an update for one story, then another. (Ex. 1st week of February could be an update for Hollywood Here We Are, then the next week, Moonless nights and the next, You Belong With Me).

So thanks again and we hope at least one of you are willing to share your ideas and co-write Hollywood Here We Are with us. We're looking forward to writing again but this time, with a co-writer! :)


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